AITA for lying about having a girlfriend to sleep with somebody?

A guy who had been casually texting a woman he found attractive noticed her responses were lukewarm. He knew she had a specific kink: sleeping with men who were cheating on their girlfriends. To spark her interest, he decided to fabricate a girlfriend and act like he was struggling with temptation—essentially role-playing the cheating scenario she enjoyed.

He looped in a close female friend, got her enthusiastic permission to use photos of them together as “proof” of the fake relationship, and then fed the story to the woman. The ploy worked perfectly, leading to the hookup he wanted. When he shared the story with friends for laughs, most found it hilarious, but one called him the asshole for lying to get someone into bed—no matter the context.

‘AITA for lying about having a girlfriend to sleep with somebody?’

The flirting wasn’t going anywhere until he learned about her kink.

He got permission from a female friend to use real photos for the fake story.

The deception worked exactly as planned, and he later bragged about it.

This scenario sits in a gray area of consent, deception, and sexual ethics. The woman has a clear kink for sleeping with men who are cheating, which inherently involves elements of secrecy, taboo, and betrayal. By fabricating a girlfriend and performing guilt, the man delivered exactly what she finds arousing—without actually betraying anyone real. No actual relationship was harmed, and both parties ended up getting what they wanted from the encounter.

That said, lying—even in a low-stakes, kink-aligned context—can cross ethical lines for some people. The critic’s point is valid: consent based on false premises isn’t fully informed consent. If the woman later discovered the girlfriend was fake, she might feel tricked or used, even if she enjoyed the experience in the moment. The man’s friend willingly participated, so no harm came to a third party, but the core deception still occurred.

Broader context matters: kink communities often navigate role-play, fantasy, and power dynamics with explicit negotiation and boundaries. Here, there was no upfront discussion; he simply performed the fantasy without her knowing it was staged. While not predatory in the traditional sense, it bypasses the mutual honesty many consider essential in sexual encounters. The lack of real harm leans it toward NTA, but the method—calculated lying to manipulate someone into bed—carries inherent risk and moral ambiguity.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Many users rallied behind the poster, calling the move brilliant and harmless since it targeted someone who actively seeks out cheaters.

A smaller group offered more measured takes, acknowledging the ethical gray area while still leaning toward excusing the behavior or calling it mutual weirdness.

Others kept things light, cracking jokes about the absurdity and creativity involved.

In the end, the poster turned a stalled flirtation into a successful hookup by leaning into the other person’s specific fantasy, using a fabricated relationship that hurt no one real. The community largely shrugs it off as fair play in a quirky, adult scenario, though a vocal minority holds firm that deception for intimacy is never okay.

What do you think—does the context of her kink make the lie forgivable, or is consent always compromised by any falsehood? Have you ever bent the truth in dating to spark interest, and how did it turn out? Drop your takes below!