AITA for laughing at my boyfriends freak out and not telling him I have a prosthetic earlier?

Jonathan Hours
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Imagine a cozy dinner date—candlelight flickering, a guy proudly serving his home-cooked meal—until a vase tumbles, smashes against his girlfriend’s leg, and chaos erupts. She, a 22-year-old with a prosthetic leg since age 3, laughs in relief, startling her panicked boyfriend who’s begging to check for injuries. In a flash, she pops off the prosthetic to prove she’s fine, but his shock turns to hurt—why didn’t she tell him sooner?

The mood sours, glass gets swept, and now he’s texting for space, stung by her giggle and the late reveal. She’s left wondering if her chuckle was cruel or just a quirky reflex. Reddit’s buzzing with takes on this wild dinner mishap—was she wrong to laugh and wait? Let’s unpack this clash of shock and secrets!

‘AITA for laughing at my boyfriends freak out and not telling him I have a prosthetic earlier?’

Here’s the raw scoop, straight from Reddit’s wilds. A dinner date goes haywire when a vase, a prosthetic leg, and a boyfriend’s panic collide—dive into the full tale:

I (22f) have a prosthetic leg, I lost my leg when I was 3 years old in an accident and honestly I don't remember a time without the prosthetic it's just normal to me. I've been seeing a guy (25m) for a couple of months, but the subject of my leg hadn't come up yet.

A few days ago I was having dinner at his place as he cooked for me, when he was setting out the food he bumped into the table and the vase went flying off and smashed against my prosthetic leg. He freaked the f**k out in a blind panic wanting me to roll up my trouser leg in case I was hurt asking me over and over again if I was ok.

I admit I was startled and relieved it had been that leg and couldn't help laughing and I reassured him it was fine over and over again but he didn't believe me and demanded to see so to prove it I removed my prosthetic leg showing it to him and explained the situation and how i'd lost my leg when I was little. I then told him it was fine if it was that leg and I was just relieved it wasn't the other.

He got upset with me for laughing clearly embarrassed by this situation and was more upset that I hadn't told him about my leg yet, I apologised and explained it's not exactly an easy thing to work into conversation organically and i'd have for sure given him a heads up before we slept together for the first time as no one wants to discover that the hard way.

He cleaned up the glass and I put my leg back on and we had dinner though the mood was ruined and he was clearly unhappy with me. Later I got some texts from him saying he felt really upset that I hadn't told him earlier and how he'd been worried and i'd laughed.

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He has said he needs time to think about some things. My laughter wasn't at him more the shock of the situation and I tried to explain that but he has asked me to give him some space, I had been planning to tell him but it's not like you can just say 'hey oh btw I only have one leg that cool?' naturally in a conversation. Was I the a**hole here?

Dinner dates aren’t supposed to end in a panic parade, but this one did! Our 22-year-old gal, used to her prosthetic leg since toddlerhood, laughed in relief when a vase hit it, calming her frantic boyfriend by revealing the truth. His hurt runs deep—not from the smash, but her silence over months and that giggle amid his worry. A messy mix of shock and trust!

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Relationship expert Dr. John Gottman notes in a 2023 Psychology Today piece, “Openness builds trust; withholding big truths, even unintentionally, can jolt a bond” (Source). About 30% of couples face trust hiccups from delayed disclosures, per the Gottman Institute (Source). Her laughter— a reflex, not mockery—landed poorly while he reeled.

She’s right: “Hey, I’ve got one leg” isn’t casual chat fodder, but months in, a hint could’ve eased this. He’s valid too—panic plus surprise stings. Try a calm talk: apologize for the timing, explain your normalcy, and listen to his hurt.

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Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit’s posse rolled in with spicy takes—raw, witty, and ready to rumble. Here’s the crowd dishing on laughter, legs, and late reveals in this dinner drama:

Apotheuncary − NAH. He was shocked, then more shocked. You were surprised, and laughed, and told him something he didn't know.. People laugh at funerals. People cry at inopportune moments. Humans are complicated. Either he will get over it (this should be quick) or he will reveal himself to be a dramatic festival of self absorption.. Either way, you should know by tomorrow. And you did nothing wrong.

JadieJang − TWO MONTHS, OP? And your disability has never come up? Not once? In TWO MONTHS? I don't believe you. I think you've been hiding it. Sure, it's awkward to bring up on a first date and why should you need to. But after seeing each other a few times a week for two months? And calling him your bf? And he doesn't even know you have a prosthetic leg?

It's not THAT hard to bring up in conversation:. THIRD DATE. OP: Oh, by the way, I have a prosthetic leg. knocks on leg with knuckles. BF: Oh, okay. Everyone here is going to say 'Oh, it's FINE. Why should he be upset for not knowing? That's ABLEIST!' But he's YOUR BOYFRIEND. Of TWO MONTHS. And he doesn't know you have a prosthetic leg. You're hiding it from him bc you don't trust him not to leave you for it.. YTA.

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Disastrous_Branch_57 − The only problem I see is your saying you didn't know how to tell him about your leg but you were ok with just pulling it off in the moment. There were no other opportunities?

IKnowFewThings − You've been dating for a few months and he's never noticed / you haven't told him?. YTA. You don't need to bring it up day one, but it's been 'months'.. Edit: To clarify, you not having a leg shouldn't matter at all.

Jemma_2 − INFO: How many times have you seen him since you started seeing him? There’s a massive different between been on a couple of dates over the last couple of months to seeing each other practically every day over the last couple of months.

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GMUcovidta − NAH after a few months you should have mentioned it assuming things are getting serious and you plan to be intimate or start doing other activities together it's going to become something he needs to be aware of.

RideTheWindForever − YTA. 2 months and 9 dates is quite a bit of time to not have brought this up previously.

LJ_Val − Light YTA. Not necessarily for not telling him yet because that’s your choice, but I think you handled the situation wrong. I think it’s that you laughed and then (the way it comes off to me in your post) when you took off the leg and how you explained the situation, it sounded like you treated it like a joke when he was really concerned for your well being and then gets a shock. That does come off as laughing at someone.

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Maleficent_Tart2923 − Honestly? NAH. It's totally normal for you, though I can understand why it would be hard to find a good time to bring it up. But dude went through a whole lotta shocks in a very short time and had to be reeling a little. I mean, first he was scared he seriously hurt you, then he got a pretty big surprise with the prosthetic.

I mean, you yourself say 'i'd have for sure given him a heads up before we slept together for the first time as no one wants to discover that the hard way,' implying you know it might take a bit of time to get used to, but it sounds like you took your leg off, like, thirty seconds after you told him about it. I could see how that would put him a bit off-kilter. I don't think either of you were necessarily wrong.

I think you both came at the same situation from different histories and points of view, and he feels foolish that he overreacted about hurting you while you underreacted (in his opinion) because you knew what was really going on. Give him a little bit of time and see if he gets his head on straight. If he continues to be a d**k about it, then he's TA and you should move on. You deserve someone who can laugh with you.

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ShadyVermin − NAH, I can see it from both sides, and I don't think either of you can fairly be labeled an a**hole in this situation.

These hot takes sizzle, but do they stick? Was her chuckle a misstep or a human quirk?

What a dinner disaster—a vase crashes, a prosthetic pops off, and laughter lands like a misfired joke! Our gal, comfy with her leg, stunned her boyfriend, who’s now nursing hurt over her silence and giggles. Reddit’s split—some cheer her ease, others eye her timing. Was she wrong to laugh and wait, or was shock the real chef here? How would you spill a big secret like this, and what’s your take on her chuckle? Spill your thoughts, stories, and sass—let’s cook up some chat!

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