AITA for kicking out my future in-laws after they lost and almost killed my dog?

The air was crisp with Thanksgiving anticipation, but in one man’s home, the holiday warmth turned to chaos. Picture a cozy house buzzing with the arrival of out-of-town guests, only for the mood to sour when a beloved dog, Lucy, bolts out the front door. The man, caught in a whirlwind of panic, spent his holiday scouring the neighborhood, heart pounding with fear. His fiancée’s family, the culprits, offered no help, leaving him to face the crisis alone.

What started as a gesture of hospitality—opening his home to his fiancée’s family—spiraled into a test of boundaries and loyalty. When Lucy was found injured, and the family showed no remorse, he made a tough call. This story dives into the clash of family expectations, pet love, and standing your ground, leaving readers wondering: was he wrong to draw a line?

‘AITA for kicking out my future in-laws after they lost and almost killed my dog?’

I'm engaged to my fiancé Meg. I own a large home. Meg spends most time at my place but technically still has her own, we are in the process of moving her in with me this fall. Since my place has a lot of room and Meg's doesn't, I agreed to host her family from out of town for Thanksgiving. I'm going to be blunt: I do not like Meg's family.

They are all extremely conservative, c**spiracy theorist, low-key r**ist, 'a woman's place is in the kitchen' types. Meg is very different from them but is close with them. She hasn't seen them in a year so I agreed that they could stay at my place for the holiday, because I can usually tolerate them enough.

Wednesday morning, Meg's parents arrive, and things are fine. A few hours later, Meg's sister gets here. I have a dog named Lucy. This is my dog, not Meg's dog and not our dog; I had her for years before Meg was around and Meg is not a big fan of dogs, although she likes Lucy. I was in the bathroom when the sister pulled into the driveway.

Meg's mom calls to me and says 'I'm going to let Lucy out front to say hi to Meg's sister' to which I explicitly said 'no, don't do that. She needs to be on a leash and I should handle her. Give me a minute and I can come help but leave her inside.' I know she heard me because she said ok.

2 minutes later, Meg comes screaming saying that her mom let Lucy outside and she ran away down the street. I ran out of the house and got in my car to drive after her, but I could never find her. I drove all around my neighborhood and adjacent neighborhoods trying to find her all day but I just couldn't.

She had my number on her collar but I was terrified she was gone or got hit by a car or something. Meg drove around in her car some throughout the day too but her parents and sister did nothing, they just spent the day alone at my house. I went home and slept and then resumed the search in the morning on Thursday, Thanksgiving day.

I continued searching and got a call in the afternoon that someone found Lucy. I went and got her and she was a mess; she had several bite marks and was bleeding in several places. I think she got in a fight with a wild animal. I took her to the ER immediately and they patched her up and she will pull through luckily, but that process took a long time so I didn't get home until Thursday night.

Today I was exhausted and basically locked myself in my room with Lucy to watch her. Meg's dad knocked on my door and told me to be a man, and that the dog was back and it was just a stupid dog so who cares. I told them all to leave right now. Meg was upset and said they didn't have anywhere, and I said I don't care but they can't be at my home.

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They eventually left after I threatened calling the cops. Meg left with them and texted that it was rude for offering my home and then kicking them out, and they made an honest mistake. I felt that her mom did not listen to what I told her, and Lucy needs quiet alone time to recover, and I never even got an apology. AITA?

Letting family into your home can feel like opening Pandora’s box, especially when boundaries are ignored. The OP faced a clear violation when his explicit instructions about Lucy were disregarded, leading to her injury. According to Family Psychology, “Clear communication and mutual respect are vital for healthy family dynamics.” The mother-in-law’s decision to let Lucy out, despite the OP’s warning, reflects a lack of respect for his authority in his own home.

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This incident highlights a broader issue: the challenge of setting boundaries with in-laws. The OP’s frustration stems from the family’s dismissal of his concerns and their failure to apologize. Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, notes, “Empathy and accountability are key to resolving conflicts” . Their lack of remorse escalated the situation, making the OP’s reaction—evicting them—understandable, though emotionally charged.

The larger social issue here is navigating differing values in blended families. Statistics show 40% of marriages involve complex family dynamics, often requiring firm boundaries (Pew Research Center). The OP’s decision to prioritize Lucy’s recovery and his own space reflects a stand for personal values over familial pressure.

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For the OP, moving forward means addressing this with Meg calmly, emphasizing mutual respect. Couples therapy could help align their priorities, ensuring her family’s influence doesn’t override his needs. Setting clear expectations for future visits can prevent similar chaos, fostering healthier family interactions.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, serving up a spicy mix of support and shade for the OP’s saga. It’s like a family dinner where everyone’s got an opinion and no one’s passing the gravy quietly. Here’s what they had to say:

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VeronicaSawyer8 − NTA. This could have been so much worse. Poor Lucy.. Did the mom say anything to you after this?? Did anyone apologize?

Methyd98 − NTA. I would leave the relationship asap. Your partner and her parents don't feel remorseful for the accident/ incident. I believe they purposely did it seeing as their reaction wasn't the normal kind,

maybe they didn't like that you had an attachment to a pet that would take attention away from your fiance. I couldnt imagine their reaction if you had a child and they got hurt (touch wood). They don't seem to have empathy at all

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MortalSmile8631 − NTA. This was not an honest mistake. Honest mistake is they opened the door, slipped and fell while leaving it open for long enough that the dog ran out. They intentionally opened the door and let the dog out after you already told them not to..

The fact that they had no remorse after the entire thing happened is insane.. To be honest, you should send them the vet bill and then rethink Meg as well. If you marry someone, their family become your family as well. Are you sure you want such toxic people in your life? Cause I sure as heck would not.

calicounderthesun − You mention Meg doesn't like dogs, is that true for her family too? Because it sounds like it. The fact that they did NOTHING and eventually Meg went back to stay with them in YOUR house is a HUGE red flag. Any normal person, even if they are not a 'pet' person, would feel horrible and be out looking with you and/or calling shelters,

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animal control etc. That you said no and the dog 'got out' anyway is suspicious to me. You need to reevaluate your future because it will be run by your inlaws. And for God's Sake do not have children with this woman.

There is no way to keep her parents away from any children you have and I'd be terrified for their safety. If they cannot follow your instruction with a poor animal resulting in a dangerous situation, there is no way they should be around a child.

The_Bad_Agent − NTA but rethink Meg. Her defense of her family is indefensible. That makes her just as bad IMO

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AceyAceyAcey − NTA. Kicking them out was reasonable. Send them the bill for the vet. If they’d apologized or expressed remorse, I would vote otherwise, but they clearly didn’t care that they caused you such distress, let alone leading to the injury of an animal. They’re sociopaths.

He_Who_Is_Person − Meg left with them and texted that it was rude for offering my home and then kicking them out, and they made an honest mistake. Nah. *This* is not an honest mistake:. ​ Meg's mom calls to me and says 'I'm going to let Lucy out front to say hi to Meg's sister' to which I explicitly said 'no, don't do that. She needs to be on a leash and I should handle her.

Give me a minute and I can come help but leave her inside.'. This is her mom sharing her husband's attitude of 'it's not my dog so I don't give a f**k'.. ​. ​ You don't seem like you're asking yourself the hard question yet: what does it say about Meg and your standing in this future marriage that she sided with them?. NTA

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lostalldoubt86 − NTA- So you basically missed the holiday they were there to celebrate because you had to care for the dog they let get injured. They did not help look for the dog. They did not apologize for letting the dog out. Her father added to the fire by being an a**hole with that being a man line.

I would have kicked them out as soon as it took more than an hour to find the dog.. Edit: AND THEY COMPLAINED YOU DIDN’T MAKE THANKSGIVING DINNER WHILE LOOKING FOR THE DOG THEY LET OUT!. Get rid of the whole woman and her terrible family.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Dump Meg ASAP. Because if she can take her parents side on this, where they are so *spectacularly* in the wrong, then she always will take their side over yours. This ends here.

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FloMoJoeBlow − “Be a man”???. “Just a stupid dog so who cares”???

These Redditors rallied behind the OP, cheering his stand but questioning Meg’s loyalty. Some called the in-laws’ actions intentional, while others waved red flags about the relationship. But do these fiery takes capture the full story, or are they just fueling the drama?

This Thanksgiving tale shows how quickly a holiday can turn into a battleground when boundaries are crossed. The OP’s love for Lucy clashed with his fiancée’s family’s indifference, raising questions about loyalty and respect. His decision to evict them was bold, but was it too harsh? Readers, what would you do if your home and heart were tested like this? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s keep the conversation going!

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