AITA for kicking my coworker out of my wife’s baby shower?

In a festive backyard filled with baby shower balloons, a young coworker’s playful “work wife” jokes turn a celebration sour. Despite a prior warning to keep things professional, Eva’s relentless quips about being the “other mom” to the couple’s unborn child unsettle the pregnant wife and guests. The husband, pushed to his limit, demands an apology or her exit, and Eva chooses the door. It’s a tense clash of boundaries, loyalty, and workplace spillover.

Readers feel the sting of a joyful event tainted by awkward overreach. This Reddit tale isn’t just about a party; it’s about respect, professionalism, and standing up for your spouse. With Reddit cheering the husband’s move, let’s dive into the drama of this baby shower showdown.

‘AITA for kicking my coworker out of my wife’s baby shower?’

I (29m) work in a pretty tight workspace. We have about 9 of us in my department and it's a pretty even split between men and women. There's one coworker 'Eva'(20f) who started working here a few months back. She's really good at her job and seems to get along with everyone.

We get along well as we work on projects together and are usually in the group of people that are the last to leave most days. I learned some weeks ago that she was calling herself my 'work wife'. I knew what the term meant, the sentiment wasn't shared and I've expressed as much.

I don't think I've been rude about it, I just let her know that I'd prefer for her to keep things a bit more professional. There's no real harm in the term, but for someone who doesn't understand the joke, it just looks and sounds wrong. I'm also a happily married man, and my coworkers including Eva know this.

I thought I had done a pretty good job nipping things in the bud after our conversation [I no longer heard the jokes from her] so I didn't think it would be an issue to invite her to my wife's baby shower. My coworkers are all vaccinated (our job helped us get them)

and my wife WFH so there wasn't much concern for the sickness that shall not be named. Eva comes in and immediately starts back up with the jokes. 'You're OP's home wife? Nice to meet you!', 'it's so nice to see who takes care of my hubby when I send him home!'

My wife is a very sweet and patient woman so she just laughed it off, albeit uncomfortably and moved on. However the jokes got worse and wouldn't let up. At one point Eva was telling people she would be our baby's second mom. My wife's friends and family were annoyed and my wife looked very uncomfortable.

I had pretty much had it by then, and took her aside and told her that the jokes weren't funny and that she could either apologize to my wife right now for being so inconsiderate and gross, or she could just leave. She chose to leave.

Word got around to our coworkers what happened and while they agree that she was acting inappropriately, that I should have let her down a little easier, as it was 'obvious she likes you OP'. Am I really the a**hole for kicking her out?

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Workplace camaraderie can blur lines, but Eva’s behavior at the baby shower crossed into disrespect. The husband’s prior request for professionalism set a clear boundary, which Eva ignored by reviving her “work wife” persona in front of his wife and family. Her escalation—claiming a role as the baby’s “second mom”—was not just tactless but intrusive, especially at a personal event. His ultimatum, offering a chance to apologize, was firm but fair, and her choice to leave speaks to her refusal to acknowledge fault.

About 25% of employees report discomfort with workplace flirtation, per a 2024 SHRM survey. Eva’s persistence after being rebuffed edges toward harassment, particularly given the power dynamic (older male, younger female) and his clear marital status. The coworkers’ suggestion to “let her down easier” dismisses her accountability, possibly enabling her crush, as some speculated.

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Dr. Lillian Glass, a communication expert, notes, “Ignoring boundaries in social settings signals deeper disregard; addressing it swiftly protects relationships”. Here, the husband’s action safeguarded his wife’s comfort and their marriage. Dr. Glass’s insight supports his decisive response. He should document the incident and report it to HR to prevent workplace retaliation. A follow-up talk with coworkers could clarify his stance on professionalism.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s dishing out fiery takes on this one, blending outrage with calls for HR action. Here’s the raw scoop from the community—bold and unfiltered.

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0biterdicta - NTA. Send HR an email about this behavior to get it on the record.

SiriusBlacksTattoos - NTA. I don’t think “work wife” is cute, especially in that situation. Your wife was probably mortified, but I am sure it helped that you handled the situation and stood up for her. She must be very patient and sweet because I’m not sure I would have been able to keep my mouth shut.

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You have addressed this with Eva before... I’d borderline say it’s harassment at this point. It’s not cute, it’s not funny and Eva needs to be a mature adult and act like a professional. Completely inappropriate, but especially at you and your ACTUAL WIFE’s baby shower.

rellyy_fishh - NTA, you already asked her to stop once before. Forcing the 'work wife' thing *outside of work* is creepy and super unprofessional. She chose to leave, rather than stop like you asked. How dare she say such things in front of your wife at her baby shower? Gross.

Davinaaa28 - NTA. Not only is she acting unprofessionally after you've discussed the issue with her, it's kinda creepy she continues the fantasy in your own home. She knows you are married with a kid on the way. There is no excuse for her behavior. 'Obvious she likes you' or not. It's beyond inappropriate and time for her to move on.

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Leafburn - WTF? Why did you invite this person to your wife's baby shower? Your wife doesn't even know her? She has her own family and friends there, yet you invite some 20yo rando from work who you have told before to keep it professional? Something fully stinks about this post. There's either a LOOT more to this story, or it's exactly that... a story. I tend to think the latter and don't believe you. So YTA OP.

Carolinamama2015 - NTA It's time to take this to HR and get it on paper before she starts making accusations against you

niallhoranstan55 - Did your coworkers mean that it’s “obvious she likes you” in a friendly, platonic way or that she likes you in a romantic feelings way? If the answer is in a romantic way, then you are absolutely NTA for shutting down unwanted advances when you are happily married.

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Honestly, even if she just likes you in a platonic way she should’ve respected your wishes to stop with the jokes. Either way, you’re NTA. It’s also very telling that she was given the choice to apologize or leave and she chose leaving. She clearly doesn’t respect boundaries. If it continues, I’d even consider talking to HR.

canadianborderguard - NTA. That is a pathetic scene, sorry you experienced it. Hope it didn't ruin the overall experience

Kettlewise - NTA. Whoa your co-worker was being incredibly inappropriate.. And you actually gave her an option - she could have apologized. SHE chose to leave.

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IAmHerdingCatz - You should have 'let her down easier?' F that. This was grossly inappropriate and possibly something you should consider reporting to HR. And if your co-workers have been encouraging this, that is problematic as hell too.. Oh, and s**ual harassment works both ways--after you told her she was making you uncomfortable she crossed that line.. Oh, in case I wasn't clear, NTA!

These Reddit opinions are charged, but do they capture the full weight of navigating workplace dynamics at personal events?

This Reddit saga asks: when does a coworker’s “joke” become a dealbreaker? The husband’s ejection of Eva from his wife’s baby shower protected his family but stirred workplace ripples. Boundaries blur when work meets home, and loyalty demands action. What would you do when a colleague oversteps at a personal milestone? Drop your stories below—have you faced a workplace boundary clash at a family event? Let’s keep the convo going.

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