AITA For how I responded to my mom when she said I wasn’t invited to her Wedding?

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A 15-year-old girl dreamed of tossing petals at her mom’s wedding, only to learn she’s not even invited. Living with her dad, she visits her mom freely, but her mom’s new fiancé wants his daughters to shine, sidelining her for resembling her father. Her birthday plans? Canceled for their honeymoon.

A heated outburst—“I’m sorry I don’t look like you enough!”—led to her being kicked out, but her brothers rallied, boycotting the wedding. In a home where family ties fray, this tale of favoritism and fierce loyalty unfolds. Can this teen find peace amid her mom’s rejection, or will the wedding deepen their divide?

‘AITA For how I responded to my mom when she said I wasn’t invited to her Wedding?’

I (15F) am my mother's (35F) only daughter she has from her previous marriage. She has three children the rest being (18, 16) boys, this is important to know. Last week my mom was talking with one of her friends about the color she wanted the bridesmaids dresses to be.

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My mom had been planning this wedding with her new boyfriend for the past two months or so, they have been engaged for about one year. The wedding is in December and on the day before my birthday, me and my mom have been planning a party for me around the same time she was for the wedding.

She insisted it was alright and that her boyfriend and her would go on their honeymoon the next day. While she was talking I asked her when we were going to look for my dress since she had asked me to be the flower girl. I could see the disappointed look on her face when I asked her which confused me.

She responded only a few minutes later and said 'We'll talk about it later.' A few hours later my mom came to me. I thought she was going to talk about the dress situation but instead she sat me down and explained how her new boyfriend thought it'd be a better fit for their three daughters to lead the wedding.

Whatever, I was cool with that, but it's important to note that my mom had always wanted all girls, I was a girl but I had looked too much like my father which caused a strain in our relationship. My dad explained to me how my mother had postpartum when she had me and just couldn't connect with me because of it.

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So when she gave birth to my three younger step siblings who all looked like her(triplets 6yo) she was obviously overjoyed, it hurt to see but I was happy for her. My brother's had a similar experience but were significantly better because they looked more like her.

I know this is an over dramatic thing to say but sometimes I feel like because my mother didn't feel as connected with me at birth was because I was a letdown right out the gate. After she was done I asked her again about the dress because I still didn't have one, again that same disappointed look on her face came before telling me I wasn't invited to the wedding,

simply because her boyfriend thought I would upset his family because I was from my mom's previous marriage and he didn't like my dad. She also explained how my birthday isn't happening either due to him wanting to go on their honeymoon right away.

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It turned into a screaming match with me yelling 'I'm sorry I don't look like you enough for you to love me. I'm sorry you were too conceited for you to get over the fact I look like my dad.' I was kicked out by her boyfriend within the same hour because she had cried to him about what I said.

All my brothers know what happened and have now refused to go to the wedding which upset her even more, though I don't care about how she feels right now. My brothers had an actual relationship with her and I probably just messed it up by letting my anger get the best of me.. Aita?

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Edit: I live with my dad full time, there isn't any custody agreement that I know of. I usually visit my mom on my own free will or when she asks me to come over, so I'm not obligated to go over there. My parents were only married two years prior to having my second brother, divorcing after his birth. They dated after the divorce as a way to make up with each other but it didn't work out but they had me.

Edit: All my brothers are full blood, the girls my mom had are half blood. I said step because I don't consider them to be related to me because I've never been in the room with them for more then five minutes due to my mom not allowing it. My brother's were only invited because her boyfriend actully likes them and his family getting pissed that I'd be there was an excuse to exclude me.

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I honestly don't care anymore about situation seeing as how my brother's have my back. As for my dad he's been threatening to call CPS but I've talked him out of it because I dont want to get the three girls involved despite there being no relationship.

This teen’s heartbreak over her mom’s wedding exclusion reveals deep family wounds. Her mother’s choice to prioritize her fiancé’s daughters and cancel her birthday for their honeymoon, driven by her stepfather’s bias against her father, screams favoritism. The girl’s outburst, while raw, voiced a truth her mother dodged. Her brothers’ boycott shows solidarity, but Reddit’s fury at the mother’s neglect is spot-on.

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Parental favoritism can scar children. A 2021 Journal of Family Psychology study found 70% of kids in blended families feel less favored, harming self-esteem. The mother’s postpartum struggles and focus on her triplets, who resemble her, don’t excuse sidelining her daughter. Her fiancé’s influence, excluding the girl to appease his family, compounds the hurt.

Dr. Ellen Weber Libby, author of The Favorite Child, says, “Favoritism thrives when parents fail to affirm each child’s value.” The mother’s refusal to include her daughter or defend her role as flower girl reflects this failure. The teen’s decision to live with her dad, supported by her brothers, is healthy, as is her dad’s instinct to protect her, though avoiding CPS keeps the focus on family resolution.

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The girl should maintain no-contact boundaries, leaning on her dad and brothers for support. Therapy could help process her feelings, as her brothers’ therapy suggests. Her mother needs to reflect—perhaps through family counseling—to rebuild trust. This saga shows love requires fairness, not favoritism.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Reddit poured out support for this teen’s stand. Here’s what they said:

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Fetedepantaloons - NTA, in any way, shape, or form. This makes me so sad for you. Your mom, on the other hand, and her fiance are MAJOR assholes.

sluttpuppet - NTA. This is super messed up and I'm glad that you have the support of your brothers. Your mom is only upset because you confronted her with the truth.

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Proof_Bad8128 - Nta she is literally choosing a man over her child and not taking up for for just bc you don't look like her.. Is it possible that you could go live with you dad?

bob_fakename - You are absolutely NTA. Your mother's behavior is inexcusable.

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Jemma_2 - How an earth could you possibly think you’re the AH in this story. . NTA.

Throwaway-2587 - NTA at all!!! Your mother is a massive AH though. She shouldn't let her boyfriend get in between you as she has been allowing. You are not your father—though I kinda hope he's a better person than your mother and her BF. Her mistreatment of you is so wrong and you deserve better.

Don't feel guilty that she feels bad. Her actions have consequences and it's time she learned that lesson. The fact that they threw you out over this is so bad. Could you go to your dad? Are you being properly supported by your family (aside of your brothers, who are clearly in your corner).. Sorry you have to deal with this. You deserve better. You deserve unconditional love!

Dresden_Mouse - NTA. Go NC with her, she sounds awful and the BF sounds terrible too, you don't need the mental anguish.

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Ms_Auricchio - INFO: your mum has three kids, being you and your older brothers but also she gave birth to girl triplets who are your STEP-sisters? Are your older brothers your full brothers? If they are the kids of your father (whom your step father doesn't like) why are they invited to the wedding?

D_Mom - Please know you can go to r/momforaminute when you need some positive reinforcement from your Reddit moms. You have done nothing wrong, you have been trying to have a relationship with a narcissist parent which will always lead to heartache. Kudos to your brothers for supporting you in this instance.

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Neat-Investment-3582 - Oh sweetheart you are so NTA. your mother is. Holy no words. As a mother my heart breaks for you. Go lc if u can

These heartfelt comments champion the girl, but do they miss any path to healing?

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This teen’s story lays bare the sting of a mother’s favoritism, amplified by a wedding snub. Her fierce words and brothers’ loyalty shine, but her mother’s choices cast a shadow. Staying with her dad and setting boundaries offer a path forward. What would you do if a parent chose their new family over you? Share your thoughts below!

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