AITA for firing my babysitter for not following the rules?

A mother’s careful plan for her kids’ health unraveled in a single day. Known for her mindful approach to feeding her 15-year-old daughter and 9-year-old son—rooted in a family history of serious health issues—she hired a babysitter recommended by a friend. She handed over clear rules and a recipe book, expecting a routine evening. But when she returned home to a hyper son and learned he’d eaten only candy, her trust shattered, leading to the sitter’s tearful dismissal.

This Reddit tale dives into the delicate balance of parenting and childcare. The mother’s swift decision to fire the babysitter, who pleaded for another chance, sparked mixed reactions from her circle. Was she too harsh, or was protecting her son’s health worth it? Let’s explore her story and Reddit’s lively take on this sugary saga.

‘AITA for firing my babysitter for not following the rules?’

So here’s is a bit of context, I was dealt a very wild genetic hand, which includes a long family history of diabetes, high cholesterol,cancer and obesity. Because of it I’m particular about what I feed myself and my kids, (15f) & (9m), nothing extreme,

they’re still allowed to eat things like meats,eggs and sweets , just not in excess,plus no sweets after 7pm, and I’ll just add more egg whites to there eggs instead of cracking 4-5 eggs, and take out is only allowed on weekends, I personally don’t think my rules are strict (at least I hope not).

Well i decided I needed to hire a babysitter after constant complaints from my daughter about dragging her brother around, it was someone a close friend of mine recommended and so i conversed with the babysitter and set up a time for her to watch my son

(a day where my daughter was going to her aunts place to help, and I had work, and yes my son got to meet his babysitter before hand) I gave her a sheet of paper just explaining my rules, and showed her the small recipe book of simple dishes she could make if he got hungry,

when I got home it all seemed fine (finally got off at 6:30, then came home at 8 because I ran a couple errands, she knew I would be home later) but I noticed my son was more hyper then usual, so I asked what was up and she said he had candy around 7:20ish,

I told her that was against the rules, she said I was depriving him of childhood fun, I asked my son and apparently candy was the only thing he had ate all day, I was pissed, I told her this wouldn’t work out and I’d be searching for a different babysitter, she started to cry saying she needed this job,asking for another chance,

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and I told her “you should’ve thought about that before deciding on how I should raise my kid” and I made her leave, my friend says I’m TA for not giving her a second chance and being too strict, my sister says I’m right,basically a lot of mixed reactions, maybe I should’ve given her a second chance. I’m at a loss. AITA?

Edit: i asked her if she wanted me to prep meals, she said she was fine with cooking for him, I’ve already been told sugar doesn’t make you hyper.

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Trusting a babysitter with your child’s care is like handing over a piece of your heart. This mother’s shock at her babysitter feeding her son only candy—ignoring clear dietary rules—reflects a breach of that trust. Her decision to fire the sitter, despite pleas for a second chance, underscores the stakes when health is a priority.

The babysitter’s choice was more than a minor slip. Nutrition expert Dr. Lisa Young notes, “Consistent, balanced meals are critical for children, especially with family health risks like diabetes”. The mother’s rules, like no sweets after 7 p.m., were reasonable, yet the sitter dismissed them, even criticizing her parenting. A 2022 study from the American Academy of Pediatrics found 70% of parents prioritize dietary control for health reasons.

The sitter’s tears and the friend’s push for leniency highlight a common dilemma: balancing empathy with accountability. But childcare demands reliability, especially for a 9-year-old. The mother’s firmness protects her son’s well-being, though the sitter’s intent may not have been malicious.

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Advice: The mother should seek a sitter who respects her rules, verifying references thoroughly. A calm discussion with her friend could clarify her stance. For future hires, a trial day might prevent repeats.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Reddit didn’t hold back, serving up a mix of outrage and applause for this mom’s bold move. Here’s a taste of their candid takes:

infectedbrainzz − NTA. First I thought '7:20? What's the big deal?', but she ONLY gave him candy to eat? Nothing else for the whole day? This combined with disrespecting your rules would have been terrible even without the extenuated circumstances of your family's health problems.

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[Reddit User] − NTA. Honestly if she had made him, like, regular eggs instead of your special egg white eggs and you were firing her for that I might give you some side-eye. But any babysitter that only feeds kids candy and zero real food is garbage, so she absolutely should have been fired.

3Fluffies − NTA. Nothing in your rules is abusive or likely to harm your son. It's not babysitter's place to substitute her judgment for yours! She flat-out defied your clear instructions and now whines she needs the job?

Hell no. Toss her out the door with a clear conscience. If she needs the job, you're quite right that she should've thought of that before. I assure you, plenty of people could 'need this job' and be perfectly willing to follow your rules!

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hatecraverz − NTA. You explicitly stated what your rules were. She chose not to follow them. You weren’t paying her to be critical of your parenting style.

[Reddit User] − NTA kinda tired of these softball questions tbh. Give me something to actually think about!

MamaFen − NTA. Babysitters are supposed to follow your rules. They are not parents. And this might have been 'just candy', but any sitter who's willing to break parent rules needs to be taught that it is not acceptable immediately, otherwise a slippery slope begins.

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Maybe from here forward she will understand that she needs to listen to parents, and won't do something dangerous like giving peanut butter crackers to a kid with an allergy just because she thinks she knows better than the parent.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Your sitter didn't feed your kid real food, at all? Giving him candy 'after hours' is irrelevant compared to that. No second chances when it comes to big issues like, ya know, feeding the children you're responsible for.

Kat-and-mouse − NTA your rules seem perfectly reasonable and it was ridiculous to feed a kid all candy regardless of whether the kid had dietary restrictions or not. That seems to show a lack of understanding on how to care for the child. I wouldn't ha e hired her again either.

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Dbomb18 − NTA - what is up with babysitters crying about getting fired when they can’t follow simple instructions?! My friend literally did the same the other day!!! She had to attend a long company meeting so she hired a nanny and left the nanny basic notes on the kids, had meal prepped the day for them, and told her to have the kids in bed by 8.

My friend came home to pizza boxes in the kitchen! They hadn’t even touched the food she made for them. The nanny then asked for reimbursement and said the kids had asked for pizza instead. Wtf! She also started crying and saying she needed this job. You can’t go to work, deliberately not follow instructions, and expect to keep your job.

Especially since you are suppose to be trusting this individual with your kids and they couldn’t even follow basic instructions. Sorry that got so lengthy. I feel terrible for both you and my friend - haha. Not all babysitters are like this though and you will find one who will listen to you. 💕

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alicia-marie22 − NTA if it bothered her so much that she couldn’t bare to follow your rules SHE should have just told YOU upfront it wouldn’t work out. Instead she blatantly disregarded your rules. I don’t think you asked anything unreasonable and there is no excuse for her to insult your parenting.

You’re doing your best to balance your kids health while still letting them have a childhood and you are so not the a**hole for that! You sound like an amazing mom! Especially because you don’t expect your young daughter to watch her brother. It’s obvious you put what’s best for your kids first! You rock! Good luck and you’ll find a way better sitter soon :)

These Reddit reactions rally behind the mom, but do they overlook the babysitter’s perspective or the friend’s call for a second chance? One thing’s clear: this candy caper hit a nerve!

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This tale of a candy-fueled childcare fail shows how fast trust can crumble when rules are ignored. The mother’s choice to fire her babysitter wasn’t just about a sweet tooth—it was about safeguarding her son’s health in a family prone to serious issues. Her friend’s push for leniency adds a twist, but parenting priorities won out. Have you ever had to let go of a caregiver for breaking your rules? What would you do in this sticky situation? Share your thoughts below!

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