AITA for filming my toddler crying instead of comforting him?

A toddler’s wail echoed through a quiet home, tugging at a mother’s heartstrings—yet her first instinct was to grab her phone. When her 2-year-old son toddled into his father’s empty office, expecting his usual lunchtime chat, his confusion turned to tears. Rather than scoop him up, the mom hit record, capturing a bittersweet moment to share with her husband, away on a business trip. To her, it was a tender snapshot of their son’s love.

But not everyone saw it that way. Her stepsister’s sharp rebuke—calling her cruel for filming instead of comforting—cast a shadow over the act. Was it a harmless memory or a parenting misstep? This small moment spiraled into a debate about love, parenting, and priorities, pulling readers into the messy, relatable world of raising a toddler. How far would you go to capture a fleeting family moment?

‘AITA for filming my toddler crying instead of comforting him?’

My son is 2 and my husband has worked almost exclusively from home since he’s been born. Usually, my son will go into his dad’s office around lunch time to call him but when this happened my husband was on a business trip. For the first two days my son went into his office and started crying because he couldn’t find his dad.

ADVERTISEMENT

It was really cute and I wanted to show my husband so on the third day I knew it was coming and I filmed it so I could send it to him. I showed my family too, including my stepsister who didn’t find it so cute and told me I was awful for standing there and filming him while he cried instead of comforting him.. AITA?

Parenting is a balancing act, and this mom’s choice to film her son’s tears teeters between heartwarming and questionable. The act—recording a toddler’s distress to share with an absent parent—reflects a desire to connect, but her stepsister saw neglect. Both perspectives hold water: the mom wanted to preserve a moment of her son’s bond with his dad, while the critic prioritized immediate comfort.

This dilemma ties to a broader issue: how parents navigate emotional moments in the digital age. A 2023 study from the Pew Research Center found 70% of parents share family moments online, often to strengthen bonds, but 30% face criticism for oversharing (source: Pew Research). The mom’s brief recording aligns with this trend, but timing matters.

Dr. Tovah Klein, a child psychologist, says, “Toddlers need to feel secure, but brief moments of distress can foster resilience if followed by comfort”. Here, the mom explained her son’s distress and distracted him after 30 seconds, suggesting no lasting harm. Still, filming first could signal misplaced priorities to some.

ADVERTISEMENT

For balance, she could comfort first, then recreate the moment for filming, ensuring her son’s needs come first.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Reddit didn’t hold back on this one, serving up a mix of chuckles and raised eyebrows! From defending the mom’s sweet intentions to questioning her delay in comforting, the community’s takes are as colorful as a toddler’s tantrum. Here are the top comments:

mybloodyballentine − NAH. Come on, folks. Everyone’s gonna laugh about this in the future. “Haha, remember mom filmed me while I was in tears because dad was gone?” My family STILL laughs about the time my father watched me put my finger in a bowl of hot mustards, taste it, and burst into tears all while he laughed.

ADVERTISEMENT

Izzyborn − Nta Honestly everyone saying YTA is assuming you didn’t comfort him. She could of recorded for a few seconds then went to comfort him. Y’all overreacting, toddlers cry over all sorts of cute or silly or serious things, and there’s nothing wrong with wanting to show your husband, who can’t be experience that because he’s at work, a video of his son crying for him. Sheesh lighten up

wintersjourneyy − INFO: Did you comfort him afterwards? I don't know how to judge as I have seen videos of me crying because I was a grumpy baby. But in those videos my dad was the one filming and my mum was comforting me (or spilling hard facts if I was the unreasonable one) so it's a different scenario.

ADVERTISEMENT

Edit: NTA the video sounds like good material to show your son when he's older like 'remember when you used to miss Dad when he went to work but forgot about it at the mention of your dino plate?'

Cryptographer_Alone − NTA. Look, I know that many people replying want the kid comforted. But! This is a two year old who doesn't understand why his parent has disappeared. This adjustment to understanding that routines aren't absolute, but that dad will be back and everything will be ok takes time.

ADVERTISEMENT

Time more than comforting words, time more than hugs. Son is going to meltdown when he can't find his father for a while. Period. And a lot of people seem to be assuming that OP filmed for a long period of time. Most parents film moments like these for two minutes or less.

You have your momentary reaction of 'awww, someone really loves and misses their parent' and then you stop filming and start helping the toddler calm down. And you don't start calming immediately because it's important to give the toddler a chance to self-soothe first.

ADVERTISEMENT

And how is OP shaming her kid? She found it endearing that he's upset his father is gone for a few days. She's showing it as 'see how much my son misses my husband' not 'look what kind of brat I need to put up with.'

TheGrateCommaNate − NTA- got two year olds now. They'll cry for a few minutes and then they'll be fine. Unless they bumped their head, comforting them makes them worse because they'll start crying for no reason. Sometimes they know they can get a reaction out of you if they cry.

ADVERTISEMENT

OpinionatedTradWife − NTA as long as it was a relatively short recording (just enough to show how cute it was he missed his dad) and you comforted him after. Crying for a minute isn't going to hurt a toddler. They cry over everything. The people who think this is bad either aren't parents or they're raising entitled little narcissists.

AsharraR12 − NTA. Clearly these people have never raised a toddler. Plus they are overreacting and assuming you NEVER comforted him or explained that his Dad wasn't there. If your that afraid of tears, I think you need to evaluate why you feel the need for a toddler to never express their sadness in a healthy way,

ADVERTISEMENT

rather than evaluate OP filming it.. Facts for those not reading her comments:. - she did explain beforehand but he's a toddler 🤷‍♀️. - he cried for less than 30 secs before she distracted him with a toy 30 secs is NOT long to cry for a toddler,

anyone who says otherwise had never had one, the kid was not traumatised nor laughed at. Take chill pill. Personally, my husband would love that kind of video, it would validate him as a parent to know he is loved and missed. OP, I think you captured a beautiful moment of their bond.

ADVERTISEMENT

new_clever_username − Nta presuming it was for a quick moment and then you comforted him.

Prestigious_Blood_38 − NTA At all. It is adorable. People who are upset probably don’t realize that toddlers Cry at the drop of a hat and letting them manage their feelings that’s how they emotionally grow

ADVERTISEMENT

[Reddit User] − Depends on how long you were recording but probably NTA. Toddlers cry over silly things all the time, and recording for a few seconds isn’t going to hurt anyone. I feel like most of the people on this thread probably aren’t parents…

These Reddit opinions are lively, but do they capture the full picture of parenting in the moment?

A toddler’s tears, a mother’s phone, and a family spat—this story reminds us how quickly small choices can spark big debates. The mom’s instinct to record her son’s love for his dad clashed with expectations of instant comfort, leaving us to ponder: where’s the line between capturing memories and meeting a child’s needs? Have you ever faced a similar parenting dilemma? Share your stories and thoughts below—what would you do in her shoes?

Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *