AITA for filing a police report for my gf selling my iPad?

Filing a police report against a long-term partner is not a decision most people expect to face. In this case, a man found himself torn between forgiveness and frustration after learning that his girlfriend had sold his iPad without his consent, then repeatedly denied it.

What makes the situation more complicated is that the couple has been together for nearly a decade and shares three children. Although he initially chose to forgive her, the unresolved issue of retrieving his stolen property pushed him to take official action. This story raises uncomfortable questions about trust, accountability, and whether forgiveness truly means letting go of consequences.

‘AITA for filing a police report for my gf selling my iPad?’

The discovery that a missing iPad was secretly sold.

I want my iPad Pro back. Seriously. Like in the worst way. So I pinged it at Walmart maybe 5 days after it was missing. I have a friend who...

Confrontation, denial, and reluctant forgiveness.

We been together 8-9 years. 3 kids together. But she denied denied denied until I finally have proof. She cried and cried and after a few days I finally gave...

We talked and the only way to make this right is if I get it back. I don’t wanna press charges but I’m sure the state will.

Filing the report and facing backlash.

So a weeks gone by and I just now started the police report after I found out u can do it online. I’ve never filed one, never even called the...

She mad bc she thinks it’s kinda fucked up for doing it now since we’re over it. She thought I would have been done it. But fuxk that. I want...

AITA for filing a police report to get my iPad back even tho I chose to forgive her. I don’t wanna press charges and probably won’t go to any court...

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The poster believed forgiving his partner emotionally did not mean surrendering his right to reclaim stolen property. From a relational standpoint, that distinction makes sense, especially when trust has already been damaged. However, what makes the situation more complicated is the legal reality that filing a police report can trigger consequences beyond his control, regardless of his stated intentions.

Opposing views focus on consistency. Critics argue that staying in the relationship while involving law enforcement creates mixed signals and escalates conflict. Others emphasize that theft within a relationship is still theft, and excusing it sets a dangerous precedent, particularly with children observing the dynamic.

From a broader social perspective, this situation highlights how long-term relationships can normalize behavior that would be unacceptable in any other context. When shared history and family ties blur ethical boundaries, people often struggle to balance compassion with self-respect. The issue is less about the iPad itself and more about trust, responsibility, and the example being set for the children involved.

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These are the responses from Reddit users:

Many users supported the decision to report the theft, stressing accountability and personal boundaries.

SigSauerPower320 − Info: Since I don't know what it is, I'm gonna ask why you didn't contact Walmart and inform them that your property was illegally traded/sold to them.

Personally, I would have contacted them immediately and informed them that it was a stolen item. This should cause them to get into contact with whomever bought it (if it's...

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I'm not saying you shouldn't have filed a report, but this could have been avoided by letting whoever had it/has it that they came into possession of it illegally.

All that said, most people in law enforcement and the courts would greatly appreciate it if you didn't file reports if you have no intention of following through with said...

helican − NTA. It **was** stolen from you. It still sucks for everyone though because of your history together and the kids.

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But if your GF so desperatly needs money that she is willing to steal from you, there might be something at play that you don't know about.

ValuableMine9 − NTA, but are you aware that it's not the victim who presses charges but the police/prosecutor? You can refuse any further cooperation after making a report,

but if there is video evidence, then they can still proceed with a theft charge. It's very unlikely if you dont want to take it further, but possible. Honestly, this...

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MoulanRougeFae − NTA for reporting it. But why the hell are you staying with her? This can't be the first time she's done something awful like this right?

Why did she do it? What was the money for and where is the money? This type of theft is something addicts do. Shopping, drugs, gambling which is hers?

What you need to do is allow the consequences to happen for the theft and leave her. If you stay you're only setting the example for your children that being...

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If your children had a partner as adults pulling the same s__t your long term girlfriend has would you advise them to stay? No? Didn't think so. Then don't set...

There's a reason that you haven't married her after 3 kids and all this time. Now step up and show your kids this isn't acceptable.

Some commenters offered mixed or critical perspectives, questioning motives and choices.

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Special_Acadia247 − Nta but what is this relationship? Y’all be together that long, have 3 kids, and still acting this childish? Why y’all not married?

S__t like this I assume… but yeah she shouldn’t be having more kids acting like this. Unless you are not telling us the truth of your iPad use…?

sallystruthers69 − You forgave her? ? Christ. Yta to yourself. You deserve all the bad that comes your way if you continue staying with this thief. Get her the f__k...

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Individual_Metal_983 − You have a bigger problem than your i-pad. The woman you share three kids with sold your property and denied it. Why did she do that? Where did...

A few responses used humor or bluntness to cut through the tension.

jellybooster − You are definitely an a__hole if u pursue legal action AND STAY WITH HER. That is probably the a__hole-iest thing you could probably ever do.

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Now its a different story if you break up with her, then that would be fine! If my bf pursued legal action toward me he would no longer be my...

Either forgive her and move on and forget it or break up with her and press charges. Because the state will pick the charges up, she will be jailed and...

and they probably wont even bother with getting it back for u honestly, so u would be doing it all for nothing. So yeah, as of now youre an a__hole...

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FriendlyBrother9660 − Together 9 years. 3 kids. And you still write like a 14 year old.

JadeArgonar − Info: why did she want to sell it in the first place?

This case shows how unresolved trust issues can turn a single incident into a relationship-defining moment. The conflict was never just about an iPad, but about honesty, accountability, and whether forgiveness should erase consequences.

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Should forgiveness mean dropping all action, or can accountability still coexist with reconciliation? If a partner steals and lies, is reporting it self-protection or escalation? And what lessons are being taught to children watching this unfold?

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