AITA for evicting my pregnant roommate?

In a cozy apartment, where shared spaces hum with routine, a landlord’s clear rules clash with an unexpected twist. A 29-year-old woman, lucky to own her inherited home, rents out a room to keep it afloat, with a contract banning babies and cats. Her roommate, a friendly 26-year-old, drops a bombshell: she’s three months pregnant. The landlord, sticking to her boundaries, calmly reminds her to find a new place before the baby arrives.

But the roommate’s friends ignite a firestorm, branding the landlord heartless for “evicting” a pregnant woman. As texts buzz with accusations, she questions her stance. This tale of contracts, personal choices, and clashing expectations pulls readers into a sticky dilemma, where fairness and empathy duke it out in a shared living room.

‘AITA for evicting my pregnant roommate?’

I (F29) own my own appartment. It was inherited, and I know I’m extremely lucky. However, to be able to keep the appartment I rent out a room. We share kitchen, livingroom and bathroom, and have seperate bedrooms.

When my current roommate (F26) signed the contract, I went over it with her. Mostly standard stuff, but one section is added that no cats or babies/children are allowed. Cats because I am extremely allergic and children because i dont want to live with a child (children visiting is ofc fine.

We have an agreement that any long term visitors will need to be cleared with the other person). Breaking those rules will lead to eviction. We get along great, we are quite similar in our habits, she always pay her rent on time, and there are no food stealing. After about a year she calls me into the bathroom one day.

Shes standing in front of the mirror in a formfitting stretchy dress and looks at her stomach. She asks me if I think the dress still fit her. I could see her stomach was bigger, but I look like that in the evening sometimes too, so I just assumed she was bloated.

I brush it off and say she looks fine, we should normalize being bloated at the end if the day. She gives me kinda a weird look before she say shes not bloated, shes 3months pregnant. Yup thats how she decided to tell me. Anyway, I’m kinda taken aback as it came out if the blue.

Shes never mentioned it before, never mentioned wanting a kid, or a boyfriend (found out the pregnancy was from a ons). After probably looking like an i**ot for a few seconds I calmly congratulate her. Not with alot of enthusiasm per say, as I dont really get excited about the idea of pregnancy and babies and this really was a surprise, but I was polite enough.

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After followed an awkward silence before I made up an excuse to have to go study. A few weeks go by and we kinda just go back to normal. While making dinner one evening I ask her if shes found a new place to stay. Shes really confused and ask what I mean.

I remind her of the contract she signed, that say no babies can live here. I tell her that she can of course stay up until the baby comes, but it would probably be wise to look for a new place soon. I dont know if she assumed she would he able to continue to stay here with the baby, but I guess so??

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A few days later I started getting texts from her friends calling me an a**hole for kicking out a pregnant women on the street. She has like 5months to find a new place, and I charge a pretty average rent for the room, so its not like she cant afford other places with roommates.

I completely understand why I might seem like the a**hole to some, but I genuinely think Im in the right here. Why should I ignore my own boundries and comfort because my roommate decided to have a baby? When she knew from the beginning its a dealbreaker to live here? Anyway, i guess im here to get a wider perspective on this.. Edit: Im not in the USA!

Enforcing a contract in a shared living space can feel cold, especially with pregnancy in the mix. Dr. Susan Heitler, a clinical psychologist, notes in The Power of Two , “Clear agreements prevent conflict, but empathy in delivery preserves relationships.” The landlord’s no-baby clause, agreed upon by the roommate, protects her comfort and health, given her cat allergies and lifestyle preferences.

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The roommate’s surprise at the eviction notice suggests a misunderstanding or assumption she’d be exempt. Studies show 68% of renters prioritize clear lease terms to avoid disputes (Forbes, 2024, Rental Agreements). Her delay in disclosing the pregnancy may have been strategic, but it doesn’t negate the contract’s clarity. The friends’ backlash, while emotional, overlooks this agreement.

Heitler suggests balancing firmness with compassion. The landlord could offer resources, like rental listings, to ease the transition, maintaining goodwill. Her five-month notice is generous, giving ample time for relocation.

For readers, upholding boundaries is crucial, but timing matters. Address breaches early with written notice to avoid surprises, and offer support to soften the blow, ensuring clarity without burning bridges.

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Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

The Reddit squad swung in with gusto, dishing out support with a sprinkle of snark. From backing the landlord’s contract to questioning the roommate’s plan, the comments were a lively mix of logic and laughs. Here’s the raw scoop:

Pronebasilisk − NTA - it's your apartment, and she signed a contract. Getting knocked up does not automatically qualify you for exceptions.

Selenite_Moon − I tell her that she can of course stay up until the baby comes, but it would probably be wise to look for a new place soon. NTA. You haven't 'kicked her out', you've given her notice that she needs to find a new living situation. She has months to find a new place and all those friends that are calling and texting you can offer up their place for her to stay.

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dizzydance − NTA. I'm also very confused. Did she think you were going to help raise this baby and just forgot about the contract? When was she going to tell you lol? 😅

If she thinks she's gonna do this all by herself, maybe she doesn't understand what's about to happen here... because it's hard for me to imagine how you *wouldn't* get pulled into helping *all the time*.

Or at the very least, being very inconvenienced and looking like a jerk when you tell her you won't help out when she's exhausted and sleep deprived. So I completely understand why you'd want to keep the boundary.

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Like, does she have a plan or a support system at all (other than these 'friends' calling you names who I kinda doubt are going to be changing diapers or up with a screaming baby at 3am)? Are her parents in the picture? I mean, ultimately not your problem. But I am kind of curious.

Huge_Industry_1259 − NTA. You are evicting a roommate for breaking the rules. Would you hesitate if she brought home a cat? Believe me a cat is a lot quieter and a lot less work than a baby. It know it seems heartless on the surface, but you put those clauses in the contract for a good reason.

It is really lousy that your roommate is telling her friends about this. This is her responsibility and she needs to deal with it. You were very smart to bring this up early. 5 month is plenty of time to find a new place to live.

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AspiringCrone − NTA. She did agree to the contract. And you gave her 5 months notice as well. Her financial situation is not yours to solve. And it's much kinder to be firm about this now than when she comes home from the hospital and finds her stuff on the curb.

Paevatar − NTA. She signed the contract. She knows she can't live there with the baby.. I don't blame you for not wanting to live with a baby in yoiur place. All the complaints and harassment from her friends aren't going to make you change your mind, and she should be told that.

If they are so concerned, let one of them take her in. If she continues to have them do this, you might be able to start immediate eviction proceedings and get her out sooner than the 5 months has. Not sure about the laws in your town, but check.

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Doctor-Liz − You're NTA! 'No babies' means 'no babies', you were never the kind of besties that you'd put up with *somebody else's baby* for. That said, you could have handled this better.

You were right to just 'oh okay' your way out of the initial convo - the correct response to 'I'm pregnant' is *not* 'better get househunting' - , but after that you should have given her formal, written notice for the end of the pregnancy ASAP. Finding out in a casual convo that 'oh, you're evicted' isn't ideal.

AnjuWess − Nta. (1) it was in a contract that she signed. (2) you specifically said she does not have to leave until she has the baby, so she has time to look. (3) if she told you sooner she could been searching sooner, but that's kinda on her.

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You aren't kicking her out on the streets. You are giving her time and she knew that kids weren't allowed to stay in the house. it's kinda on her in my opinion. Also to make you feel better this is coming from someone who has a child and another on the way.

Known-Programmer1799 − NTA. It's not illegal in many places in the US to have stipulations like that if the landlord lives on the premises, or shares space with the tenant. She signed a contract. You're not immediately removing her either, you said she can stay while she finds a place, she has 5 months to do so.

I know English isn't your first language, so probably not in the US but if we have stipulations like that, I can imagine other countries do too. You're not renting a flat to her, you're letting her stay in a room in your house. It's different rules.

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People might say you're not empathetic or whatever but you're allowed to determine what sort of roommates you'd like to have. It doesn't sound like you've got the best space to raise a kid anyway.

[Reddit User] − NTA. First point. You are not making a pregnant woman homeless, as her friends suggest. Rather, you are giving a pregnant woman several months notice that she needs to find a new living arrangement. If she fails to use that opportunity, it is her issue, not yours.

And, parenthetically, I note that she would have had **more** notice if she had disclosed her pregnancy to you in the first trimester. Second point. A pregnant woman is entitled to a certain amount of deference. Not going to argue there.

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But that generally pertains good parking spaces, the nice seat on the subway, assistance when handling heavy objects, and a ride to the hospital if she unexpectedly goes into labor. That deference does not demand that you give up your own rights.

Third point. If you were her landlord living across town or something, I'd be giving you some serious side-eye, condemning you, and noting that you're possibly breaking discrimination laws. But since you're also living in the place, a whole other set of rights come into play.

You are her **landlord and roommate**. If you were merely her roommate, I believe you would be entirely within your rights, ethically speaking, to negotiate either your exit from the rental or hers. But given that you own the place and landlord -- only her exit is a viable solution.

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Fourth point. As you note, she knew damn well when she signed her rental agreement that the pregnancy would require her to move. That's why she didn't tell you until she could no longer conceal it. That kind of thing is bad faith on her part. Not to mention (as I said above) that she could have had more notice from you if she had been truthful.

Fifth point. She also knows damn well that she's in the wrong. That's why she's getting her friends to bombard you with appeals to emotion and social status. If she had a leg to stand on, ethically speaking, she would appeal to an ethical theory.

Not to mention that if you yield to her friends' social pressure, then you're on the hook to be a doormat for the foreseeable future, as they harangue you for making a woman with a newborn, woman with a toddler, woman with a young child, woman with a tween, woman with a teenager, and woman with a twenty-something slacker son homeless.

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It's a good idea to cut that noise off here. Oh ... and if her friends are concerned about her being homeless and pregnant, one of them could put her up or they could take a collection to get her an apartment. Sixth point.

You've taken the polite, human approach by telling her she needs to find a new place. Since she's not amenable to that, it's time to take the business approach. First step is to offer some kind of settlement. Maybe offer her a month of free rent if she agrees to vacate by the end of December.

Yeah, that's a bribe and it sucks. But it's cheaper than the alternative, both in terms of dollars and psychic costs. If she's not willing to play ball, then you drop the hammer. Is she a month-to-month tenant? Then forget the pregnancy clause and give her the minimum notice to move out.

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if she doesn't take it seriously, then haul her into court and start the formal eviction process. In doing so, pile on every conceivable theory you can for not just requiring her to move, but also extracting money from her on the way out.

And make it clear that the suit goes away if she signs a settlement agreement, packs her bags, and leaves.Seventh point. Consider this an early, painful lesson. In life, some people are going to try to take advantage of your kind nature.

When you stand up for yourself and refuse to let them take advantage of you, they will call you an a**hole. Often, standing up for yourself will make you feel like a Grade-A a**hole. But sometimes the only way to defend yourself and your rights is to be willing to face that kind of opprobrium.. Eighth point. Find some new friends.

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Redditors cheered the landlord’s stance, calling out the roommate’s oversight and her friends’ overreach. Some wondered about her support system; others urged tougher action. But do these hot takes solve the mess, or just stir the pot?

This apartment drama shows how fast a clear rule can spark fiery backlash when life throws a curveball. The landlord’s commitment to her contract clashes with her roommate’s new reality, raising questions about fairness and flexibility. Her story invites us to weigh personal boundaries against empathy for others’ challenges. What would you do if a roommate broke a dealbreaker rule? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s unpack this one!

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