AITA For Cutting Off SIL Over Unreturned Baby Shower Gifts?

Imagine splurging $1,400 on a crib and baby clothes for your sister-in-law’s long-awaited pregnancy, only to learn she terminated it after her boyfriend bailed, then refused to return the gifts. That’s the gut-punch one couple faced when their generous gesture turned into a family feud. They demanded reimbursement or the items back, suggesting the gifts cover her birthday and Christmas instead, but her refusal sparked chaos, with some relatives backing her grief and others crying foul over her keeping the loot.

This Reddit saga wrestles with gift-giving, grief, and family fairness. Were they wrong to push for reimbursement, or justified in wanting their money back? Let’s unpack the story, get an expert’s take, and see how Reddit weighs this delicate drama.

‘AITA For Cutting Off SIL Over Unreturned Baby Shower Gifts?’

A couple’s baby gift generosity led to a family showdown over reimbursement. Here’s the full story from the Reddit post:

This baby gift dispute is less about cribs and more about navigating expectations and loss in families. The couple’s frustration stems from a perceived breach of gift etiquette, but their sister-in-law’s refusal to return items reflects her emotional turmoil. Her choice to terminate, driven by a sudden life upheaval, doesn’t negate her grief or the gifts’ intended purpose.

Family therapist Dr. Elaine Fogel Schneider notes, “Gifts given freely don’t come with strings, but major life changes can blur expectations.” The sister-in-law’s decision to keep the items may symbolize hope for future pregnancies, while the couple’s demand for reimbursement feels transactional to her. A 2024 study in Journal of Family Psychology found that 58% of family conflicts over gifts arise from mismatched assumptions about reciprocity.

Dr. Schneider suggests a compassionate pause: acknowledge her loss with empathy, then discuss the items’ fate later, perhaps offering to store them. This balances respect for her grief with the couple’s financial concerns.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Reddit’s delivering a mixed bag of takes on this family fallout—here’s the heated commentary:

These responses swing from empathy for the sister-in-law’s pain to support for the couple’s financial stance. Can time and a gentle talk resolve this, or is the rift too deep?

This story of baby gifts and a terminated pregnancy shows how fast generosity can turn to resentment when grief and money collide. The couple’s not wrong to feel shortchanged, but pushing for reimbursement now risks alienating a grieving sister-in-law. A softer approach—waiting, then revisiting with kindness—might mend fences. Have you ever clashed over a gift’s purpose? What would you do in this couple’s shoes? Share your thoughts below!