AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn’t taking it seriously.

Imagine the scene: a couple plotting a big move to a new state, dreams of fresh starts in the air, and job interviews lighting up the calendar. But instead of nailing offers, our redditor’s girlfriend turns the tables, grilling companies like a seasoned detective! She’s dropping applications left and right, leaving him baffled and frustrated. Is she sabotaging their plans, or brilliantly calling the shots? A Zoom call, a wild barge story, and a heated fight later, we’re left wondering: who’s off base here? Buckle up for this job-hunt drama!

Our guy’s girlfriend, tied to an in-person gig, needs a new role for their relocation. He expected a standard job hunt, but she’s been relentless—quizzing recruiters on engineering practices, safety flops, and more, axing four of six prospects. He called her picky, fearing she’s torching bridges; she insists she’s a hot commodity, with firms begging her back. A wild interview story sparked a blowup—did she jump the gun, or is he clueless about her game? Let’s dig in!

‘AITA for criticizing how my girlfriend takes job interviews? She basically interviews them, and I feel like she isn’t taking it seriously.’

My girlfriend is at a job she can't do remotely, and we're planning to move to another state together, so she's job hunting right now. Her first interview, she had a call with a top company who's recruiter had messaged her on LinkedIn.

I was expecting her to treat it normally, but she spent an hour grilling the company on its engineering practices then withdrew her application. And the next few calls with companies she had, she basically grilled them all and decided against moving forward with four of the six.

I told her around then, that I feel like she's making a mistake, being so picky, and she's gonna ruin her reputation in the industry if she's going around taking interviews and cutting the process off early.

She said she wasn't making any enemies, hell, the companies she dropped had been emailing and calling constantly, wanting to bring her in for another interview or asking her to reconsider. If anything, she was a hotter commodity.

I felt like she was probably still hurting her reputation long term, even if her little power play was working for a bit.. She said it wasn't a power play, it was professional, she just didn't want to waste anyone's time.

But the next interview I overheard started a big argument. One of her final two companies had her taking a Zoom interview and she was laughing it up with an interviewer and he was telling her this story about how he and his coworkers fell off a barge into the river working on a project.

And she just was like 'waiiit they had y'all doing that, not tied off to anything? Look as funny as that is, that's honestly kind of f**ked up they put y'all in danger like that - I'm honestly gonna have to withdraw my application'

She got off the phone and said 'Damn, people really tell on themselves if you just listen and smile, did you hear that s**t?' And I said that I thought she ended it a little prematurely, like didn't even ask if they'd changed anything there, just ended the call.

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I said it felt like she was trying to delay getting a new job, was she getting cold feet or something? She said no, this is literally how people at her level interview, she was serious about the interview process and she wasn't interested in walking into a chaotic work environment.

I said that was BS, she was Holding herself back on purpose basically haranguing the companies who want to hire her on the phone. And she was like 'why do they keep coming back for more then? Like I'm critical but I'm not wrong and they know it.'

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We had this big fight where she insisted that anyone wo was at her level of a career 'interviewed' by interviewing companies to see whether they were worth their time, just as much as the other way around, and I said that was BS.

She got mad I was telling her about her own career and said she knew it better AITA for arguing with my girlfriend about her interviews? I feel like she's dragging her feet, she says she's interviewing normally for her field.

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Job hunts can be a pressure cooker, and this couple’s clash turns up the heat! Our redditor’s girlfriend flipped the script, interrogating companies to fit her standards, dropping most for red flags like unsafe practices. He sees it as foot-dragging, risking her rep; she calls it professional, vetting chaos-free workplaces. It’s a spicy mix of trust, career savvy, and crossed wires—tensions flared when he questioned her commitment.

Interviews aren’t one-way streets. Career coach Alison Green, in a 2024 Slate column, notes, “Seasoned professionals interview companies as much as they’re interviewed—fit matters for both” (see Slate). Her approach—grilling on practices, bailing on risks—shows confidence and experience, especially if firms chase her. His worry about reputation misses the mark; demand for her skills seems high, not harmed.

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This ties to a broader shift: the modern job market. A 2025 Forbes report says 63% of skilled workers prioritize culture and safety, rejecting misfits (see Forbes). Her barge story bailout flags legit concerns—safety lapses aren’t laughs. His “cold feet” jab and criticism ignored her expertise, sparking friction.

Green advises, “Trust a partner’s career instincts; support, don’t steer.” He should listen, ask about her goals, and back off—her field, her rules. Couples can discuss timelines for the move, but her process shines.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Here are some hot takes from the Reddit squad—bold and cheeky! Is our guy meddling in her career lane, or is her pickiness a problem? The crowd’s serving up spice and insight!

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Shieby1234 - YTA. Stop mansplaining how to interview for a job that you do not do and in a field you do not know.. It isn’t an issue until it becomes an issue.. Yes, I am assuming OPs s**.. ETA: Thank you for the awards kind people!

[Reddit User] - YTA your gf is actually doing this right. She should be interviewing the company and withdrawing when they don’t meet her expectations. They need her, she doesn’t need them. I also don’t walk into chaotic work environment.

I’m at the level and experience I don’t have to. Sounds like she’s in the same spot. It’s also her job, her life, and her decisions on how to manage it - are you going to work at these jobs with her? No? Keep your nose out of it then.

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[Reddit User] - INFO: does it bother you that your girlfriend is more successful than you?

uhhhhnothanks4 - Sounds like she should’ve vetted you a little better. Stay in your lane. YTA

maroongrad - YTA. Are you a recruiter? Are you a professional in her field? Have you listened to professionals in her field interview? No? Are you basing this on your own interview experience in your own field? Yes? Quit mansplaining.

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rainyreminder - YTA. Not only does her approach work for her, she's being selective about taking the role that's the right fit for her at the right price, and that's the best thing you can do in a job search.

You are giving her *terrible* advice and you really need to stop before she decides that *you* are telling on yourself and dumps you. If you are going on interviews and *not* viewing the process as you also assessing them, you're doing it wrong.

Bitter-Conflict-4089 - YTA. Interviews are to determine if the position is a good fit for BOTH parties.. That is why it is called an interview and not an audition.

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[Reddit User] - I kind of went through is exact situation. We wanted to move. I was applying and got recruited to some. Asked their practices like normal and turned away a few. My husband had the same concern.

I had to explain there’s a caliber you have to hold the company to and yourself to if you plan on growth.. He didn’t get it until I got this job.. I’m making double what was expected, moved, and my husband doesn’t have to work.

He’s dancing in grocery stores. I’ve never seen him like this. Not going to say you’re an a**hole. It’s a genuine concern. But if y’all aren’t in the same industry, she may know what’s best. Trust her.. Good luck.. Edit: more clear.

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Amethyst-talon91 - YTA do you work in her field at her level? If not mind your business. I hate when my husband tries to tell me how to handle or do my job. He finally learned to let me handle MY job. You don't get to tell her how to pick her place to work and it isn't your place to. Stop spying on her interviews.

FuntimeChris79 - YTA. It sounds like your gf knows her worth and isn't willing to just take any old job which is honestly how the job market is right now. Stay in your own lane and let her make the decisions concerning her career.

These fiery takes blaze through Reddit, but do they nail it? Is she a job-hunt hero, or is he right to worry?

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This interview showdown’s a doozy: a girlfriend grills companies, drops risky ones, and stands firm, while her guy cries foul, fearing delays and drama. She’s chasing the perfect fit; he’s doubting her moves—tensions hit a peak! It’s a tangle of trust, career smarts, and big plans. What would you do if your partner flipped the interview script? Drop your thoughts, experiences, and advice below—let’s crack this career conundrum together!

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