AITA for Considering Reporting My Doctor for Breaching My Privacy?

In a sterile exam room, an 18-year-old woman, fresh into adulthood, expected a routine checkup to mark her independence. Instead, her longtime pediatrician blindsided her by sharing medical details with her mother without consent, spinning a lie to cover it up.

The sting of betrayal left her questioning trust in healthcare. This Reddit tale weaves a gripping story of privacy, professionalism, and personal boundaries, where a doctor’s misstep threatens a young adult’s autonomy. Let’s dive into this medical drama and explore what it reveals about trust and accountability.

‘AITA for Considering Reporting My Doctor for Breaching My Privacy?’

I just turned 18 two weeks ago and had a doctors appointment yesterday. I went with my mom and little sister, but drove separately because I had a class right after. This is relevant to the story. Now, when we went to the front desk to check in, the woman there asked me if I wanted to sign a form that allowed my mom to see my medical records from now on.

I said no, I would think on it (I was going to say no either way but I felt uncomfortable saying that with my mom standing right next to me). I went into the exam room alone and everything went fine, then my doctor came in to go over some things with me. This doctor has been seeing me and my two younger siblings since we were babies, and knows my mom well.

This doctor has always annoyed me because she always gets on my case about my weight, saying i'm too skinny and accusing me of not eating. When she came in yesterday, after asking me some follow up questions, she abruptly left the room saying she needed to ask my mom if she wanted me to get the flu shot.

I was sitting on the exam table dumbfounded. I'm 18, isn't this my decision to make? She came back and said my mom had said yes to the flu shot. I got it, then the nurse handed me my papers and I went home. When my mom and sister got back, my mom said that she told the doctor that it was my decision to get the flu shot

(I was going to say yes of course, but she didn't even ask me. Only my mom) and that the doctor told her that I had asked her to ask my mom. That's absolutely not true. My mom also told me that the doctor said she wasn't supposed to tell my mom, but she told her details about my check up saying I was fine with it. Which of course I was not, i never gave her permission to do that.

I know this whole thing seems small, but I'm worried that it will compromise my visits to the doctor in the future. My parents, expecially my mom, are kind of strict, and there are some things I just want to stay private. How can I trust my doctor if I feel I have to lie to her so I won't get in trouble with parents? I don't want to lie to my doctor, especially about serious things. Is this some sort of violation?

Info: She is a pediatrician, I won't be seeing her much longer anyway, but now I want to see what can be done about this.

Edit: For those asking, my mom was not in the room with me! The doctor said walked out saying she was going to ask my mom, and i didn’t have a chance to stop her. Also, i didn’t sign any papers to those who mentioned that, though i’m not sure if that makes a difference. Thank you to all those who have given me advice on this ❤️

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Edit 2: I’m hesitant on this because since she’s been my doctor for so many years, she may have done it out of force of habit. The thing that doesn’t sit right with me is that she told my mom that i had asked her to check with my mom, when i didn’t at all.

Edit 3: for those asking why i went w my mom: my sister had an appointment the same time as me, and she’s a minor so she needed my mom to be there with her. as i mentioned: i was in the exam room alone and the appointment went totally fine other than her asking my mom about the flu shot, and her telling my mom about my appointment after i left to go home.

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This medical mishap exposes a serious breach of trust in healthcare. The doctor’s actions—sharing details and lying about consent—violate patient autonomy, especially for a newly minted adult. Her history with the family doesn’t excuse bypassing permission, and her lie suggests awareness of the error.

Dr. Barron Lerner, a medical ethicist, notes in The Good Doctor, “Patient confidentiality is sacred; breaching it undermines trust essential for care.” Studies show 25% of young adults avoid healthcare due to privacy fears, often stemming from such violations. The doctor’s habits from pediatric care don’t justify ignoring legal boundaries like HIPAA.

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Reporting is reasonable to protect future patients, though her long tenure might explain the lapse. The woman should switch doctors and file a complaint with the clinic or licensing board.

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit erupted like a crowded waiting room with this one—imagine a virtual clinic buzzing with outrage! Most backed the woman, slamming the doctor’s blatant privacy violation.

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SauteedRedOnions − NTA, this is a flagrant HIPAA violation. This situation right here is precisely one of the reasons HIPAA exists at all.

HowardProject − NTA You absolutely need to report this because this is one of the reasons that teenagers tend to walk away from Medical Care. They find that they can't trust the doctor that they have known for many years,

and wind up not trusting doctors in general for avoiding medical care if it has to go through their parent's health insurance because they are afraid that any doctor will do what this doctor did. You have the right to keep your Healthcare information private and you have the right to make your own medical decisions.. Report this.

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Final_Commission4160 − NTA report her now both to the clinic and the relevant licensing board. And get an new doctor ASAP don’t see this one again unless you have no other choice. I’d even change practices if it’s a mixed specialty one.

CrankyBrick − NTA. Not only did the doctor violate your right to privacy but they lied repeatedly to you about it. Report her and find a different doctor immediately.

SammyLoops1 − NTA - 'I know this whole thing seems small' It's absolutely not small and the doctor could be seriously in trouble for what she did. This was a violation of your privacy and I know you said that you won't be seeing her much longer anyway,

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but I would make that the last time you use her. And I don't blame you for reporting her. Who knows how many other people she's doing this to. Probably many since she seemed very comfortable doing it to you.

YeahIgotanopinion − NTA this is a serious HIPPA violation. Good luck, and sorry this happened.

Ask_Aspie_ − You should go to a different doctor. She is a pediatrician, so her actions of consulting your parents is probably habit, due to the fact most people by your age have already stopped seeing a pediatrician.

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the-sunshine-slut − NTA. You need to report her. Not only is she being wildly unprofessional, she’s violating every HIPAA law there is to violate. I would also be willing to bet everything I own on the fact that she has done this and worse to other patients. Report her. If not for yourself, for other patients, because the next one she does this to may have abusive parents who use medical information to abuse them.

Spreepodcast_r − Absolutely report her. The fact she lied to both parties means she knows she's wrong. As you said, she could disclose sensitive info about a vulnerable kid in the future, if she hasn't already.. NTA

[Reddit User] − NTA. That was a clear breach of PHI (protected health information). Report the incident to the clinic manager.

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But do these Reddit rants hit the mark, or are they just stoking the drama?

This doctor’s blunder turned a routine checkup into a trust-shattering ordeal. The woman’s urge to report feels justified, but is it too harsh for a longtime doctor’s possible habit? Privacy is non-negotiable, yet mistakes happen. What would you do if your doctor crossed this line? Share your thoughts—have you faced a breach of trust that made you question a professional?

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