AITA for Calling Out My Friend’s Instagram Stalking After Her Apology?

Picture this: a bustling university campus, where new friendships bloom over shared meals and late-night study sessions. For one international student, navigating dietary choices as a halal eater was just part of the adventure—until a friend’s gossip turned a simple meal into a social media storm. The sting of betrayal lingered as whispers spread, all because of a misinterpreted photo from years past. What happens when a friend’s obsession with your Instagram history stirs up drama?

This Reddit tale dives into a clash of assumptions and apologies, with a 21-year-old student caught in the crossfire. Her commitment to halal eating sparked an unexpected feud, leaving her friend group divided. The story unfolds with a mix of cultural misunderstanding and social media sleuthing, pulling readers into a relatable saga of loyalty, gossip, and the power of a well-timed clapback.

‘AITA for Calling Out My Friend’s Instagram Stalking After Her Apology?’

I (21f) eat only halal. I’m an international student and I made a new friend, let’s call her B from my course recently. We’ve been out to eat a few times with people from our course and a few mutual friends. The places we went to had really good food but weren’t halal, which was more than fine. I just ordered a vegetarian meal or something from their seafood menu.

Still delicious.. I guess me not eating meat offended B?. I swear the weirdest things set people off. Recently I start hearing stuff from our mutual friends that B’s been going around saying I don’t actually eat halal and using a picture of me eating McDonald’s as proof. Here’s the thing. I’m not very active on social media. I post on Instagram maybe once or twice a year.

That doesn’t mean I don’t like going out and doing stuff, I just don’t like posting about it. But my friends do, and whenever we do something they post it and tag me. So if you go to my insta, there’s a ton of pictures of me in my tagged photos. My friends are social media crazed. I opened my insta account in 2015. I honestly don’t think I’d have the patience to scroll down that far.

That photo of me eating McDonalds was taken in 2016 when I was with my friends back home in Singapore. In Singapore, all major fast food chains are halal.. B obviously didn’t know that. Someone got around to telling her, because she did apologise to me. I didn’t appreciate her, you know, talking about me behind my back and accusing me of stuff I didn’t do but I heard her out.

And I did mention that it was impressive that she managed to find that photo since it was taken in 2016 after she apologised. My friend group is split. Half of them just think that was funny and the other half think I embarrassed her even more after she acknowledged her own mistake and apologised to me willingly.

This tale of Instagram detective work gone wrong is more than just friend-group drama—it’s a window into the complexities of cultural assumptions. When B spread rumors about the OP’s halal diet, she didn’t just misjudge a meal; she weaponized social media to question someone’s identity. This kind of gossip can erode trust, especially in diverse friend groups where cultural nuances matter.

Psychologist Dr. Susan Krauss Whitbourne explains in a Psychology Today article, “Gossip can serve as a form of social control, but it often backfires when it’s based on false assumptions” (source). Here, B’s actions reflect a need to assert influence, but her lack of cultural awareness—ignorance about Singapore’s halal McDonald’s—fueled the conflict. The OP’s response, highlighting B’s obsessive photo-scrolling, subtly called out this overreach.

This situation ties into broader issues of cultural sensitivity in multicultural settings. A 2020 study by the Pew Research Center found that 59% of young adults in diverse communities encounter misunderstandings due to cultural differences (source). B’s assumption about the OP’s diet reflects a failure to ask questions or seek context, a common pitfall in cross-cultural friendships.

For the OP, moving forward means setting boundaries. Experts suggest open communication to address misunderstandings—perhaps a candid chat with B about respecting dietary choices.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

The Reddit community didn’t hold back, and their takes are as spicy as a plate of Singaporean chili crab! Here’s what they had to say:

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[Reddit User] − NTA, look B here, talked about you behind your back without you not knowing about it, how do you know if she didn't do that before? And why would she try to tell others that your not halal? I mean she kind of tried to ruin you by lying to your friends, and if she scrolled all the way down...., that she tried to find a reason to lie to your friends about you *lying.*. Edit: Mom, I'm famous

Chrestys − NTA - You called out someone who was gossiping in an attempt to make people like you less and she got called on it. I'm not really sure why you'd want friends like that, but that's your choice.

beetleink − NTA what a weird thing to get mad and obsessive about. You pointing out that B's actions were strange wasn't inappropriate at all.

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Cutie3pnt14159 − NTA... But it's cool and interesting to learn that McDonald's in Singapore is all halal. Not something I ever would have thought of.

[Reddit User] − NTA I'd down grade her from friend to acquaintance based on that behaviour. Does she scroll thru her Jewish friend's social media trying to find a picture of them eating a cheeseburger? Trifling.

HeckinZebra − NTA, it WAS weird. She spread lies about you behind your back, and then got offended when you told her the truth, wtf. She SHOULD be embarrassed by her creepy ass behavior.

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Oh, and I LOVE Singapore, the food is fantastic. House of Kebab on Arab Street is amazing, even the cheap Indian restaurant in the cafeteria in Punggol Plaza was incredible.

I miss the Serangoon mall, the zoo(I got to pet a lemur lol), Gardens by the Bay, Sentosa, Clarke Quay(new years there was baller), exploring underground shops and crosswalks, waking down Orchard Rd looking at Christmas decorations, hanging out on Lor Halus.....sorry, didn't mean to go on a tangent hahah. I miss Asia.

[Reddit User] − nta, seems a little over obsessive on the “friends” part, why go through so much trouble looking for hate

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Korrin − NTA B apologized because she realized she was incorrect about the food being halal, which isn't even the problem with her behavior. Your comment called her out for digging through photos more than 5 years old in order to feel like she had ammunition to start s**t talking you behind your back which is f**ked up all by itself. It wasn't just 'a little misunderstanding.'

It was her being annoyed enough by something to go digging through your history for proof of who knows what wrong doing she suspects you of and going out of her way to try to turn people against you. She should be called out for that. That kind of behavior is crazy and she should be embarrassed by it.

ClearWaves − NTA. But that girl isn't your friend.

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[Reddit User] − I think your comment was pretty subtle. Most definitely NTA. Though she really has some issues if she’s scrolling your Instagram for images.

These hot takes from Reddit are bold, but do they capture the full picture? Is B’s apology enough, or does her social media sleuthing demand a bigger reckoning?

This story reminds us that friendships can be a minefield when assumptions and Instagram stalking collide. The OP’s quick wit exposed B’s overzealous digging, but it also sparked a divide among friends. It’s a tale of loyalty tested and cultural gaps exposed, leaving us wondering about the balance between forgiveness and accountability. What would you do if a friend turned your old photos into gossip fodder? Share your thoughts—have you ever faced a similar social media showdown?

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