AITA for bringing up a report against my guidance counselor and getting her taken out of the running for an award + potentially hurting her career?

Imagine a middle school hallway, buzzing with chatter, where a chronically ill student steps back into school after months of absence, only to face a chilling threat from the one person meant to guide them. For this Redditor, a single encounter with their guidance counselor—marked by harsh words about truancy and family separation—left a scar that lingered into high school. Years later, a casual mention of that incident in a college application meeting upended the counselor’s chance at a “most loved staff” award and sparked a deeper investigation.

Now, with family calling the teen’s actions “uncalled for” and guilt creeping in, the Redditor wonders if speaking up was a step too far. Readers feel the weight of this dilemma—balancing justice for past wrongs against the risk of derailing someone’s career. Was the teen wrong to revisit old wounds, or did their truth shine a necessary light?

‘AITA for bringing up a report against my guidance counselor and getting her taken out of the running for an award + potentially hurting her career?’

This story starts a few years back, but the events I feel I might be the a**hole for happened this past week. So short backstory, I’m chronically ill and I used to be out sick from school for months at a time. I was in middle school the first time I was out of school for a long period of time.

It started out really hard to get the proper documentation for my absences and then for an “extended medical leave.” Aka: I needed to be tutored from home because I couldn’t physically come to school. Eventually I got a doctor who was extremely helpful and had continued contact will the school.

The issue of truancy that popped up because of the time between my first absence and my first tutoring session was dropped, and it seemed like everything was going smoothly. However, when I started feeling better I had to slowly transition back to school.

On my first day back I was supposed to go to three classes, then meet with my guidance counselor to discuss how I was feeling. While I was walking to my 2nd period class and talking to friends that I hadn’t seen in awhile, my guidance counselor pulled me away from them and told me (these are the exact words, quoted from the report we made years ago):

“If you are absent one more day and cause another ounce of work for me I’ll raise truancy charges against your family and have you taken away from your mother”. We later reported her to the principal. They didn’t care, she’s still employed.

Here’s where I think I’m a bit of an a**hole. Four years later I’m in my new counselor’s office talking about my college application process. My new counselor tells me that my old counselor is being highly considered for “most loved staff member.”

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I kinda chuckled at the news and told my current counselor about what happened and the report my family made. Apparently this caused some discussion about the old counselor. She is no longer being considered for the award and now from what the school has told my family privately the matter is being reopened and looked into.

Something about her having multiple complaints. I feel pretty guilty and like a bit of an a**hole because it happened so long ago, it’s not exactly a good thing to potentially ruin someone’s career. AITA?

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EDIT: I didn’t mention it, but I totally should of. I told a few family members about what was going on and they told me that my actions were uncalled for because it happened so many years ago. They also said I was an a**hole because it was probably just one bad day.

Hence my doubt. I also wanted to thank you all for being so kind, and for giving me so many awards. I went to bed last night and had no idea it would blow up this way. I also finally understand what rip my inbox means.Thank you guys for clearing up that what she did was really bad.

A lot of people used to tell me that it wasn’t a big deal. I also totally forgot until 504s were brought up in the replies. While I was transferring into high school she completely removed my 504 because she thought it was pointless.

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My mom had to go to the state to get it reinstated. (A 504 plan is a plan which provides accommodations and protection for disabled students). So yeah, no more sympathy for her here.. Thank you guys!.

A guidance counselor’s role is to support, not intimidate, yet this teen’s experience reveals a troubling abuse of power. The counselor’s threat to a chronically ill student—warning of truancy charges and family separation—was not just unprofessional but deeply harmful. The Redditor’s decision to share this years later, prompted by the counselor’s award nomination, wasn’t vindictive but a natural response to unresolved injustice. The multiple complaints now surfacing suggest a pattern, not a one-off “bad day.”

This case reflects broader issues in school systems, where 1 in 5 students with disabilities report inadequate support, per a 2023 U.S. Department of Education report. Dr. Amy McCart, a school psychology expert, notes, “Educators must prioritize empathy, especially for students with medical challenges; failing to do so undermines trust”. The counselor’s removal of the teen’s 504 plan further highlights her disregard for student needs.

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For resolution, the school should ensure thorough investigations of such complaints and provide training on supporting students with disabilities. The teen could seek closure by discussing the impact with a trusted adult or counselor.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

The Reddit crew came out swinging with support and sass—here’s what they had to say about this counselor conundrum:

7thSparro − NTA!! YOU didn't ruin her career. Her lack of empathy did.. She shouldn't be a counselor. And she has more than one complaint, so it's not on you. I've eaten enough crow in my life, I have little sympathy for others who need to have their share, you know?

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PeachyNOLA − NTA. She was soooooo wrong to have said that to you, plus you said there were other reports too. You shouldn't feel guilty for her being a s**t person & it finally catching up to her.

HowardProject − NTA 'Multiple complaints' means she's still doing this, and getting away with it until a student who had a legit medical problem and is college bound wasn't as easily ignored now that complaints are piling up.

Open-Yogurt − NTA. She told a chronically ill child that if they continued to be ill (and therefore forced her to do her f'ing job) she would get them taken away from their mother; she's the a**hole, along with whoever didn't fire her reprehensible ass years ago after the intial report.

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ChickNamedVenus − NTA. Giving any type of staff award to a person that's an incredibly s**tty worker and, frankly, a s**tty person in general is wrong. They need to save that award for the staff member who truly deserves it.. What goes around comes around and it just came back to her.

ozwilde − NTA. She got a four year year delay on consequences, and it sounds like she probably hasn't become a better guidance counselor or person in that time

LitChick2000 − Thinking that principal was a buddy and swept many concerns under the rug. Now, this being brought up opened her file to review to confirm your complaint, and 'lo and behold! She is not so sweet nice and beloved. Quite the opposite.

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McSuzy − NTA. She ruined her career.. if in fact she experiences any actual repercussions.

geistkind − NTA That comment of hers was uncalled for. With her having multiple complaints, it seems that she is treating others as harshly as she treated you. It was her own actions that caused issues with her career, nothing you did. Hopefully your health is getting better. I have chronic health issues as well so I can sympathize.

[Reddit User] − NTA - you told the truth, you have nothing to feel bad about. The old counsellor should feel bad, as she’s the AH for being so rude to a child who was transitioning back into school from a long period of illness. Counsellors are supposed to be empathetic, and she wasn’t. She was very unprofessional.

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She should have faced disciplinary action for her unacceptable behaviour. She was no longer considered for the award, not just because of what you said about her, but from other complaints too. It’s only right that they should be looking into her conduct. The old principal who did nothing about your complaint should also be looked into, as he enabled her bad behaviour.

These Reddit takes are full of fire, but do they capture the full weight of this teen’s tough call?

This story of a teen speaking truth to power shows how past wrongs can ripple into the present, demanding accountability. The Redditor’s honesty didn’t just cost a counselor an award—it exposed a pattern that needed addressing. Schools should be safe havens, not battlegrounds, and one student’s voice can spark change. Have you ever had to call out someone in authority for their actions? Drop your experiences below—how would you balance guilt and justice in this situation?

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