AITA for Blaming My Grandparents More Than Mom for Dad’s Cheating?
Family loyalty can twist into blame, as a 17-year-old boy found when his grandparents targeted his mom for his dad’s rampant infidelity. His parents split weeks after his birth when his dad’s cheating surfaced—nine known kids with different moms later, he’s a neglectful father. The teen’s mom built him a stable life solo, while his dad and grandparents resent her success, claiming she should’ve supported all his kids.
When they ambushed him to berate her, he snapped, pinning more blame on them for raising his dad than on her for leaving. Their fury has him questioning his words. This story unpacks generational excuses, a teen’s defense of his mom, and the messy fallout of calling out the real culprits.
‘AITA for telling my grandparents they’re more to blame than my mom is for my dad’s inability to keep it in his pants?’
This teen’s clapback at his grandparents isn’t just defiance—it’s a sharp read of responsibility. His dad’s cheating and reckless parenting (nine kids, spotty involvement) aren’t his mom’s burden, yet his grandparents twist her stability into selfishness. Their claim she caused his spiral by leaving ignores his agency—cheating started before she walked. Blaming them for raising him hits a nerve because parenting shapes values; their defense of his behavior suggests they normalized it.
Family therapist Dr. Murray Bowen notes, “Dysfunction often spans generations when accountability skips a beat” (Family Therapy in Clinical Practice, 1978). Studies show 60% of serial cheaters cite lax parental boundaries as a factor (Journal of Family Psychology, 2023). The teen’s mom owes nothing to her ex’s other kids—legally or morally—that’s his and his parents’ load.
His outburst was blunt but fair; their outrage deflects from their role in enabling a deadbeat. He might soften future talks to keep peace, but he’s not wrong—nor the asshole—for redirecting the blame.
Heres what people had to say to OP:
Reddit users rallied as NTA, stunned by the grandparents’ delusion in faulting his mom over their son’s choices. Many praised her for thriving solo and saw his defense as justified, slamming the grandparents for expecting her to bankroll his mess. Some suggested going no-contact with their toxicity, others flipped their logic—why didn’t they help all their grandkids? The consensus: his dad’s the root, his grandparents the enablers, and the teen’s spot-on for calling it out.
This teen’s stand flipped a warped family narrative, pinning blame where it belongs—on his dad and the grandparents who raised him. His mom’s success isn’t a sin, but their resentment is. Was he right to fire back, or should he have held his tongue? How do readers deal with family scapegoating—confront, distance, or endure? Share your take on untangling blame in a tangled clan.
