AITA for being more excited about my moms pregnancy than my stepmoms?

Shirley Stafford Hours
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In a living room thick with awkward vibes, a 16-year-old girl sat through her dad’s big pregnancy reveal, mustering a polite smile for her stepmom Molly. But when her mom shared her own baby news days later, her face lit up like a fireworks show—pure, uncontainable joy. That contrast didn’t go unnoticed, and soon, her dad was knocking on her door, ready to lecture her about “fixing her attitude.”

This isn’t just about babies on the way; it’s a tangled web of divorce scars, loyalty, and a teen caught between two homes. Her blunt honesty about Molly’s role in the past stirred a storm, leaving her grounded and questioning herself. Readers might feel her heart racing, wondering if she crossed a line or just spoke her truth. Step into this family drama where old wounds meet new beginnings.

‘AITA for being more excited about my moms pregnancy than my stepmoms?’

I (16f) have divorced parents. They divorced when I was 10 years old after my dad cheated. The court gave my parents 50/50 custody. My dad (48) quickly married his mistress Molly (36) (fake name) and he also adopted Molly's 2 other kids, Grace (10) and Oliver (7) (both fake names).

I didn't find out about my dads cheating until I was 13 and my uncle (on my moms side) let it slip while drunk during a family gathering. When I confronted my dad he tried denying it but the stuttering and the red face gave it away. After that I lost all respect for my dad and Molly. I don't like Molly.

She split up my family and keeps trying to force a relationship between us, even introducing me to her friends as 'her daughter' or 'her special daughter'. I've asked her to stop but she won't. She even tries calling me about random things when I'm at my moms house, I used to pick up but now I just ignore them.

I don't see her as a mother figure and I never will. My mom (39) took the divorce hard, but slowly started rebuilding her life and 2 years ago she met Greg (49). Greg is the greatest. He and I get on very well and we have the same interests. He also doesn't try to force a relationship between us and gives me all the space I need.

Recently my dad and Molly sat me, Grace and Oliver down to announce that Molly was pregnant. Grace and Oliver were ecstatic and I congratulated them but wasn't jumping up and down as much as Grace and Oliver. Something about her being the one to have my half sibling is just wrong.

The woman who split up a family is now starting her own with my dad. Well, not long after my mom came to me and told me she and Greg were expecting as well. Of course I was more excited for this since my mom is like my best friend, Greg and I have a fantastic relationship and I know that they'd be great parents.

I guess Molly realized I was quite happy about something and asked what. Here's where I might be the a**hole. Instead of just saying my mom was pregnant, I kind of went on a rant about how excited I was and how I can't wait to met the baby and how I wanted to plan a huge baby shower etc.

Molly nodded along and didn't say much else. I didn't think much of it until my dad came into my room that night and sat on my bed. He says Molly's feelings were really hurt that I didn't show the same excitement for her pregnancy than I did for my moms and that I shouldn't feel any different towards her because they are both carrying my half-siblings and that I needed to apologize to her and 'fix my attitude'.

I listened to him but the more he talked the more angry I got. I told him that if she wasn't a homewrecker than I'd be more happy and they shouldn't expect the same treatment from me that I give my mom because I have little respect for them and their blended family they force down my throat.

My dad went off at me, saying what he and my mom went through was none of mu business and if I wasn't such a brat then I'd realize that him and Molly are trying their hardest to get through to me and have a relationship. He said I was 16 and needed to stop acting so juvenile etc. He then took my phone (I'm typing this on my laptop), grounded me and left without another word, refusing to hear me out.

Its only Tuesday and I still have a whole week until next Monday with them. Tensions are high but honestly I don't feel like apologizing or starting to act different around Molly. However I know that he's my dad and I probably shouldn't've called her a homewrecker and she's pregnant but I just don't know what to do, so like AITA, should I apologize and move on?

Edit: So I posted this yesterday and I wanna quickly clarify that the timing doesn’t match up because I lowkey wrote it in a fit of rage on Tuesday (when everything went down) and I kept it in drafts then yesterday I decided to post it because my friend said I should. Anyways, I didn’t expect this to blow up so fast(I know I sound like one of those AI generated things right now but I’m serious this was crazy).

I really wanna thank some people because it kind of felt like a groupchat of support, idk I cried reading them because it's been a lot so thanks for the support and stuff.. Also from reading the comments I do want to clarify some other things: Lots of people mentioned family therapy and to be honest I can’t ever imagine my father agreeing to therapy, he’s not very big on emotions.

He’s either happy or mad and I think it also reflects on how he cheated on my mom and won’t hear my feelings out, I just don’t think he has a very high EQ or whatever. (No I don’t think he’s a s**iopath, but not very understanding of others emotions).

Some people asked if my mom or dad bought my phone because if my mom did then legally he had to give it back or something, but my parents actually bought my phone together like 2 weeks before they told me they were getting a divorce (I think they thought it’d help me through the divorce or something but it just caused me to discover Billie Eilish at 10).

So I guess they both have control over my phone. Others say I should take a look at the custody and try to get my mom full custody. But like he’s my dad, you know? I dunno, I don't want to cut him off and we do have good memories. I just have little respect for him. Like it sounds confusing but I don’t want to cut him off but I also don't like him.

I think I’m stuck in the middle and I don’t want to stress my mom out more with her pregnancy and with custody battles. Also I DO blame my dad for the affair, not just Molly, however I didn’t write much about it since it was more about Molly's pregnancy and my moms pregnancy than my dads infidelity and I’ve mentioned In the first post that I have little respect for him about it.

But since it's been a week (since I first wrote the post) I do have a little update. (By little I mean long-ass update). So like the next morning I got ready for school and stuff. I get up at like 6.30 to 7-ish, Molly usually doesn’t get up until 8 and my dad sometimes doesn’t wake up until like 10 (he works from home) so I’m usually alone in the mornings (which I don’t mind) but I was thinking about it on the bus the whole way to school and I told my friends about it and they all agreed with me which was nice,

but a few of them did say maybe I should just apologise because I live with them and stuff. So after schooI went home. My dad was waiting in the lounge and I tried to sneak upstairs but he called me in. Molly was also there and I knew I was in for it. He started by asking if I was ready to apologise.

While I probably would’ve, seeing them sit there all disappointed in me like they were innocent and I was evil struck a nerve so I sort of muttered ‘I’m sorry’ and then of course my dad went on another rant about how that wasn’t enough and he’s really upset with me blah blah blah. I (naturally) started crying and quite literally just walked out the front door.

I didn’t have anything though since I had already dropped my bag on the floor at home . So I just aimlessly walked around my neighbourhood for a little bit and I was really tempted to just walk to my moms house but I knew I’d probably get another lecture and it was like 20 minutes away so I went home and my dad went off at me AGAIN for walking out during conversation and stuff but its not a conversation if 2 adults are just yelling at a minor.

So I apologised again (for walking out) but I told him I was upset about the whole baby thing and explained how I’m closer to my actual mom then Molly, how I’m hurt that they split up my family and they never tried to give me space or fix anything so of course I’m happier for my mom.

Then I got another lecture which made me want to rip my hair out, and I yelled back and we went back and forth in a bit of a screaming match, except it ended in my dad yelling that if I hate them so much (I never said I hated them, I was just telling them how I felt and brought up the affair one to many times) then I should go stay with my mom for the rest of the week.

So long story short I ended up at my moms and I felt really bad because I didn’t wanna intrude on her and Greg's time since they weren’t expecting this. But they were really chill about it and Greg (being the absolute GOAT he is) agreed to do a starwars marathon on Friday with me to make me feel better (it's wednesday evening at this point).

When mom found out the reason for me being at her house she was furious with dad and said she would handle it etc, but then I started crying again because mom was pregnant and I didn’t wanna stress her. She and Greg calmed me down and I went to bed. So from Thursday to now I haven’t heard from my father.

My parents custody is one week with my mom and one week with my dad and it's going into the week when I’m actually supposed to be with my mom so I won’t have to see him for another week. Things are kind of weird though because I feel like this has been blown out of proportion.

I understand calling Molly a homewrecker was mean and I should be more mature than that but I didn’t really think my dad would fully kick me out. I really wanna hear from him soon because I’m scared he's never gonna talk to me again or give up custody rights. I know what he did is bad but mom has moved on and is happier and I think he and Molly were trying.

I told my school counselor about it and ended up having a panic attack in her office because I was so stressed and scared and my mom had to get called in. My mom said she’s starting me in therapy and Greg hasn’t said much about it but is always asking if I’m okay which is nice (yes, we did our starwars marathon and it made me feel so much better).

Mom has been really mad at dad and I’m really scared that I’m harming both my mom and Molly’s pregnancy because that wasn’t the intention. Everything is very quiet now though and I don’t even know if my dad is gonna contact me (he gave me my phone back while he was calling my mom to come and get me) I’ve been texting him but I’m left on delivered.

So that's the current situation (sorry for it being so long) Idk if you guys would want another update if anything else happens. I really hope my dad texts me and we can talk it out but talking things out aren’t really his thing, he just expects apologies and to move on so yeah idk. But literally thank you so much for all the nice things it's helping literally so much. I’ve replied to some comments and I want to read more comments and advice since you guys are being honest about it.

Two pregnancies, one teen, and a whole lot of baggage—talk about a family plot twist. The girl’s louder cheer for her mom’s baby over Molly’s isn’t just favoritism; it’s a neon sign flashing unresolved pain from her parents’ divorce. Her dad’s demand for equal excitement ignores the affair that reshaped her world, leaving her stuck in a loyalty tug-of-war.

Molly’s push to bond, calling her “daughter,” feels like an invasion to a teen still grieving her old family. Meanwhile, her dad’s anger dismisses her valid hurt. Dr. Patricia Papernow, a stepfamily expert, notes in a 2017 Psychology Today article, “Kids in blended families need adults to honor their losses, not erase them”. Papernow’s words highlight how forcing closeness can backfire, deepening resentment.

This reflects a bigger issue: blended families often stumble over past wounds. A 2020 study by the American Psychological Association found 60% of stepfamily teens report loyalty conflicts (https://www.apa.org/topics/families/stepfamily). The girl’s outburst wasn’t polite, but it was honest. Her dad could rebuild trust by listening, not lecturing. Therapy might help her process anger without lashing out.

For now, she could try a calm talk with her dad, owning her harsh words while explaining her feelings. Molly might ease off on the “daughter” label to respect boundaries. Readers, what’s your take? Can this family find common ground, or are old scars too deep?

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s serving up a buffet of opinions on this blended family blowup, and they’re not shy about picking sides! Here’s what the internet crew had to say, with a sprinkle of sass and spice:

Chaoticgood790 − NTA but you’re 16 and most places would let you choose who you want to stay with. See if you can be with your mom and Greg full time

MelodieClean − It’s only natural to feel closer to your mom’s pregnancy given the history, your dad and Molly can’t expect you to ignore the hurt they caused while demanding the same excitement.

professionaldrama- − NTA  If your mom bought you that phone, call her from a friend and make her demand your phone to be given back to you. He has no right to punish you because of your feelings, especially when they’re valid. 

Careless_Welder_4048 − NTA. Just say are you sure it’s even yours? She’s a cheater.

Rich-Respond5662 − It’s wild that parents that cheat have the nerve to tell their children that the relationship that destroyed their child’s family and forced their children into a new family dynamic is none of that child’s business. That is the most selfish, short-sighted, and immature crap I’ve heard. Your father needs to grow the hell up.

Bitter_Animator2514 − You called it how you saw it. They destroyed your family by having an affair. You got to watch your mother find. Strength and rebuild a life your father just carried on with his mistress and her child making them his own. What trauma did he or her face. You got thrown between 2 houses whilst their children stay in one home.

He has no right to punish you for your feelings. NTA All actions have consequences just because he’s settled with the life he chose he doesn’t have a right to force you to accept his new redo family It’s normal for you to be happier that your mum who your closer to be having a baby. With your stepmom is to you the whore who helped destroy your family

Spirited-Lychee-9942 − No I don’t think you’re the a**hole for being more excited about your own mom’s pregnancy, considering the circumstances of your dad and Molly’s relationship. I think it’s actually juvenile and immature of him that he can’t see why you aren’t warming up to Molly and his new family. Sorry you’re in this situation

nick4424 − Firstly, what your mum and dad went through is most definitely your business because it directly affects you to this day. Also has Molly ever apologised to you for what she did?

ihadone − NTA, you’re 16, of course your response was juvenile, you’re not fully grown yet. Also, you were right, Molly was his affair partner, she literally contributed to the breakdown of your family unit. It’s quite normal for you to be more excited about your mother being pregnant than your stepmother being pregnant,

your relationship with your mother is much closer than the one you have with Molly, and your dad wanting it to be different doesn’t make it different. Seriously, he’s the one who needs to grow up here, expecting you to show the same level of excitement for both pregnancies is unrealistic at best.

Lucky_Bit_5649 − NTA - in what world is it juvenile to be more excited about your biological mothers legitimate child and not your father’s mistress’s love child (idc if the parents were divorced at this point, the child was a product of their marriage which was a product of their affair, this is my personal opinion and no one has to agree with me).

Especially when said mistress is shoving herself, her children and her friends down your throat. Oh ETA - how is an affair/divorce none of the child’s business when they are a child of divorce because of it? Especially when you bring your mistress into their life as a “permanent” new mummy that she doesn’t want, like or respect.

These Redditors brought the heat, but do their verdicts nail the truth? Or is this family puzzle trickier than they think?

This teen’s louder cheer for her mom’s baby landed her in hot water, but it’s hard to blame her when divorce ghosts still haunt her heart. Her dad’s hoping for one big happy family, but forcing it might push her further away. Should she swallow her pride and apologize, or hold her ground? If you were 16, caught between loyalty and resentment, what would you do? Drop your thoughts below—let’s untangle this messy web of family ties together!

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