AITA For being mad at my wife when she insisted on including her parents in dinner plans?

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A lakeside family getaway promised relaxation, but one couple’s dinner plans turned into a recipe for drama. Excited for a fancy restaurant meal, a man secured a coveted reservation for his family, only for his wife to insist on waiting for her late-arriving parents. With the restaurant fully booked, her plan to hold the table for hours was a non-starter, sparking a heated clash.

Was he wrong to lose his cool? The argument left them dining apart, with tempers flaring and pizza replacing fine dining. This Reddit tale dives into the mess of family expectations and vacation hiccups—let’s dig in.

‘AITA For being mad at my wife when she insisted on including her parents in dinner plans?’

My family spent the 4th of July weekend at a lake resort this year. We all rented cabins there. It was my parents, my brother and his wife, and my wife and I and our 3-year old son. My wife's parents were also going to be there, but they were driving from out-of-state and weren't expecting to arrive until Saturday. The rest of us arrived early on Friday.

There is a pretty upscale restaurant on the resort property that I wanted to try and we were told when we arrived that we would need to make reservations as the restaurant fills up quick, especially on a holiday weekend. So, that was pretty much the first thing I did once we got settled in.

I made a reservation for all of us for Friday night at 6pm. I confirmed this time with everyone before making the reservation. Not even 30-minutes after I made the reservation, my wife tells me that her mom just texted and they were way ahead of schedule and would be there around 8-9pm Friday night.

They were sharing a cabin with my wife and I so that wasn't an issue. However, my wife said that I need to call and change the reservation so that her parents can join. I called and tried to change the reservation, but they were completely booked up past 7pm. I asked about Saturday night, but they were already completely booked.

Same thing for Sunday night. I asked about getting a table as a walk-in and they said the wait time could be up to 2-3 hours without a reservation. When I got off the phone I told all of this to my wife and she tried to insist that we include her parents somehow. I told her it doesn't seem like that's possible.

She suggested keeping our reservation and trying to keep the table until her parents arrive, but I told her there's no way we can just keep a table for 2-3 hours while we wait for her parents. The restaurant wouldn't allow that.

After going around in circles for almost an hour, I finally told her that if she needs to include her parents in our dinner plans, then I'll cancel the reservation and we can all order pizza instead. She didn't like that idea either because she was excited about the nice restaurant.

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She wasn't offering much help besides 'lets just see if we can keep the table until my parents arrive.' Finally I had enough so I told my brother and parents that they should go have dinner without us since we need to wait for my in-laws and we'll figure out our own dinner plans. They weren't very happy about it, but they went on their own and had a good meal.

My wife was moping about the entire thing and was mad at me for sending my family without us and not being willing to try and keep a table for 3 hours. I told her that's an impossible ask of a fully-booked restaurant, but she wasn't getting it.

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I ended up just feeding our son and myself because my wife was upset. Of course, when her parents finally showed up it was almost 10pm and they had already eaten. My wife could tell I was mad at her and I'll be honest, I didn't try to hide it. I was pissed.

This lakeside spat is a classic case of clashing priorities under vacation stress. The husband’s frustration stemmed from his wife’s unrealistic push to include her parents in a fully booked dinner, disrupting plans for their 3-year-old and extended family. Her insistence on holding a table for hours ignored restaurant realities and group dynamics.

Relationship expert Dr. John Gottman notes, “Successful couples navigate conflict by validating each other’s perspectives and finding compromise” (source: Gottman Institute). The wife’s focus on her parents’ inclusion, while heartfelt, overlooked practical limits—restaurants often turn tables every 90 minutes during peak times (source: OpenTable). The husband’s decision to send his family ahead was practical but fueled resentment.

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Both sides have merit: she wanted family unity, he wanted a smooth evening. Dr. Gottman suggests “soft startups” in conflicts—calmly stating needs rather than escalating. The couple could’ve texted the in-laws to confirm their plans or arranged a separate meal.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Reddit jumped in with gusto, slamming the wife’s table-holding fantasy while backing the husband’s practicality. From restaurant worker rants to sympathy for the missed meal, the comments are a feast of opinions. Here’s what the community served up:

IHaveSaidMyPiece - NTA. People that behave like your wife are super annoying.. It's great she wants her parents included, however it wasn't possible this time through no one's fault. You tried, she should have seen sense and let the people who were there enjoy the plans that were agreed on.

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[Reddit User] - NTA Restaurant worker here, holding up a table on a super busy night like that is not going to happen and it’s incredibly annoying when people try to do that.

PaintLicker_2022 - NTA. Did your wife forget you have a 3yo and having them sit at a table for 3+ hours, into bedtime, would’ve been a nightmare? Or, did she even ask if her parents wanted to wait that long to eat before trying to do this?

mzpljc - NTA. For the record you would have been completely justified in going to dinner anyway.

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saddiebabbie - NTA. Not one bit. Your wife acted like a child and ruined the night for you, it's as simple as that. She needs to apologize and be more considerate next time. Literally nothing else can be said about this.

[Reddit User] - NTA ~ your wife on the other hand. How hard would it been for her to have had some simple communication with her parents? She could have saved both of you a whole lot of aggravation if she’d simply asked them if they were grabbing dinner on their way or explained that you guys were eating out before they arrived and that they should stop and grab dinner on their way.

girlfromdundee - NTA damn you're on vacation, where schedules are meant to be flexible, and ppl can pursue special experiences. So many things are not in our control, but pleasing our partners is...plus her parents are grown-ups who ought to understand. I hope that they don't always require your wife to go to such lengths when they're around.

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Phoenixfangor - NTA; you were being very reasonable and offering up several alternatives. It would be rude to keep a table at the restaurant for that long, if they would even let you. I would guess that they would have thrown you out, honestly.

lipstickandlimes - NTA at all, she was being a brat about something common and reasonable that you couldnt control.

[Reddit User] - NTA. You can’t hold a table like that. I’m sorry you still had to miss out on the dinner. Before I got to the part where they arrived and had already eaten I thought that might’ve been the case.

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This dinner disaster shows how quickly vacation vibes can sour when plans clash. The husband’s snap was born of frustration, but his wife’s push for inclusion missed the mark. A quick chat with her parents could’ve saved the night. Ever had a family trip derailed by last-minute demands? What would you do in this restaurant rumble? Share your stories below!

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