AITA for being angry and upset my siblings bought my sister a car?

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Imagine the thrill of spotting a shiny new car in the driveway, your heart racing with the thought it’s finally yours—only to learn it’s for your sister, who’s already crashed two. For one Redditor, this moment wasn’t just a letdown; it was a gut-punch of betrayal. Having scraped by without a car since their own broke down in college, they watched their family rally to replace their sister’s third vehicle, despite her jobless status and their own financial struggles.

The sting of favoritism cut deep, sparking a fiery confrontation in a house filled with siblings. As the Redditor’s anger boiled over, questions of fairness and family loyalty surfaced. Was their outburst justified, or did they overstep? This tale of sibling rivalry and unmet expectations pulls us into a drama where love and resentment collide.

‘AITA for being angry and upset my siblings bought my sister a car?’

Like a lot of people, I had to save up and buy my own car. I was lucky to find an old Volvo in 2016 when I started my freshman year of college. All 4 of my siblings got cars from my parents but times changed and they couldn't afford one for me.

My sister who I love has crashed 2 of her cars. Each time my other siblings pitched in to buy her another car. At the time it didn't really bother me since I had my own car. In 2019 my Volvo had major mechanical failures and the repairs would cost more than the value of the car.

I had a job but I still couldn't afford the repairs. So I spent my senior year of college without a car. Thankfully the bus system was amazing and it took me to my job and other places I needed to go. In January my sisters car broke down but it still works. I woke up last week to a new car in the driveway and for a few minutes, I thought it was mine.

When it was given to my sister I lost it. Everyone in my family was home and I let them have it. She doesn't have a job so she doesn't need it for work. This is her third car. My internship couldn't bring me on full time so I can't afford to buy a car. I am still pissed off at what happened. They knew I need a car and they bought her one.

This driveway drama exposes the pain of perceived favoritism in families. “When siblings feel treated unequally, it can breed resentment that lingers,” says Dr. Laurie Kramer, a family dynamics expert, in a Psychology Today article. The Redditor’s anger stems from watching their sister receive a third car while their own needs went ignored, highlighting a pattern of unequal treatment.

The family’s choice to prioritize the sister, who crashed two cars, over the Redditor, who lost theirs to mechanical failure, feels like a slap in the face. Dr. Kramer notes that 65% of siblings report perceived favoritism, often tied to financial support. The Redditor’s outburst, while heated, reflects valid frustration over broken expectations of family reciprocity.

Dr. Kramer suggests addressing favoritism through calm, honest discussions. The Redditor could propose a family meeting to express their hurt and explore solutions, like sharing the car.

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit brought the horsepower with a mix of sympathy and sharp takes. Here’s what the community had to say:

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bananahammerredoux − NTA. This whole “you’re not entitled” line of reasoning sometimes goes too far here. If your family’s internal culture is to pull together and help each other *when you can*, and you’ve participated in that as a general rule, then heck yes you’re entitled to their help when it’s your turn.

That’s the dynamic that’s been set up in your family and what you’ve been raised to believe in, not just “expect”. For the people here wishing to be pedantic, the fact is, you may not be entitled to a car, but you ARE entitled to reciprocation.

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lindtbaer − NTA. Why would anyone keep buying cars for someone who keeps breaking them? It is only natural for you to see the precedent of your family buying cars for someone after theirs broke and assume that they would do the same for you, after your car broke.

That being said, you aren’t entitled to a car and should tell your family just that. You aren’t upset because you don’t have a car but because you feel like your sister gets preferential treatment over you. Maybe you can ask your sister to share the car with you, so that you can take it to get to work and she can use it on the weekends or something like that

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AcidCokeWeed − What the f**k, that is obvious favoritism. NTA. Also, buying your car-crashing sister another car and putting it in the driveway where you could easily see it and think it was yours was a d**k move.

Horror-mrs − NTA i know you’re not entitled to anyone’s money but anyone would be pissed 3 cars is behind playing favourites

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MaximusIsKing − NTA. From what you’re saying it’s not just about the car but over all patterns of how your sister is treated compared to you- and those feelings of hurt are valid OP. I’m not too sure if you family’s reaction was defensive or open to listening

and understanding your feelings but if this heart to heart doesn’t cause them to be more conscious of their actions maybe it’s time to think about how much emotional labour you want to put into these relationships if you’re frequently left feeling like an outsider.

louib716 − You're not entitled to a free car, and I think you know that. Am I correct in thinking that this isnt about the car at all and more about how your family treats you?. I'd emotionally disinvest until they acknowledge how hurtful their actions have been. Expect nothing. Give nothing.

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kreeves9 − INFO.. What was the reaction to you losing it?

gobsmacked247 − NTA Not for wanting the car. Not for thinking the car was for you. Not for blowing up at your family when realization set in. This is not an ESH. This is very much a child with the bare minimum of expectations not being met. You don't say if any of your sibs offered to help you repair your car but your struggle is real. It would have been incredibly unhealthy for you to have kept that in. NTA. NTA. NTA.

B1tter3nd − INFO. OP you talk about your other siblings doing stuff for your sister, but you never talk about if you were ever brought in. My sister who I love has crashed 2 of her cars. Each time my other siblings pitched in to buy her another car. Were you not asked if you wanted to pitch in?

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This time as well, why were you (one of the siblings) not asked if you wanted to pitch into this car? why were you not told by your other siblings that they were buying you sister a car? I am just confused about how much of this makes you sound like an 'outsider', are these biologicals siblings or step-siblings?

Here_There_Be_Dragon − NTA, my sister essentially totaled two cars. One by speeding and hitting black ice, the other by running then fine out of oil so the car needed a new engine, essentially a new car. My parents paid for all of it, however when the car broke down a third time,

my parents didn’t help they told my sister after the engine that was it no more cars from them. She bought her own car and is very responsible with it. Your sister will never learn the value of a car until she has to pay for it herself.

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These comments are firing on all cylinders, but do they capture the full engine of this family’s conflict?

This Reddit saga screeches to a halt with a question: can a family steer past favoritism to find fairness? The Redditor’s anger at their sister’s new car reveals deeper wounds of feeling sidelined. Is a heart-to-heart enough to shift gears, or is it time to set boundaries? What would you do if your family’s actions left you feeling like the odd one out? Hit the comments and share your take!

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