AITA for banning my friends “emotional support dog” from my house?

In a bustling San Francisco apartment, the constant hum of city life is interrupted by an unexpected guest: a so-called emotional support dog that’s more chaos than comfort. The homeowner, fed up with puddles on the floor and relentless barking, draws a line in the sand, banning the furry troublemaker from his space. But when his friend flashes a doctor’s note and cries foul, the situation turns into a full-blown drama, leaving everyone questioning boundaries and legitimacy.

This Reddit saga from the AITA subreddit has sparked a lively debate about personal space and the murky world of emotional support animals (ESAs). With the dog’s antics pushing the homeowner to his limit, the story dives into the clash between friendship, responsibility, and the right to a peaceful home. It’s a tale that makes you wonder: when does “support” become a burden?

‘AITA for banning my friends “emotional support dog” from my house?’

To start things off, I don’t think his emotional support dog is legit. I don’t know the process for getting one or what the requirements are so I could be wrong but from my understanding all he did was fill out a form online, print a certificate and bought a ESA vest from Amazon.

He brings his dog with him everywhere but it’s not trained at all. It barks at people, pisses everywhere and barely listens to any command. When he brings it over his dog pisses on my floor even after being outside, gets slobber all over the floor after drinking, barks/lunges at the tv, barks when there’s a noise outside (I live in San Francisco, noise is non stop), he’s pooped a couple times

but that’s a rare occurrence thankfully and when we order food he shares his food with the dog and gets crumbs all over. I tried to be understanding that he needs the dog but the more I’m around it the more I’m starting to think there’s no way this dog could be legitimately certified as a support animal.

He claims his doctor certified he could get one and as I said I could be wrong since I don’t know the process for getting one or registering one but his dog is not behaved enough in my opinion. I told him we can hang out but he can’t bring that dog with him, I don’t care if it’s inside or left outside.

Cars and people are constantly going by so the barking is very annoying. He got pissed off and pulled up something on his phone trying to say he’s allowed to bring the dog wherever he wants, it’s not safe for him to be without his dog and everything under the sun.

I told him tough luck, that dog is not welcomed on my property under any circumstances. An hour later he sends me a picture of a letter supposedly from his doctor certifying he needs a support animal and outlining how support animals work.

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I said I don’t care what his doctor said or what the ESA website says, that dog is not coming in my house until he at the very least potty trains it. The last thing he sent is “I need time separated to comprehend what is transpired and be where I am appreciative and welcomed.”

I think he’s being a drama queen about it because he wants sympathy but a mutual friend of ours thinks I’m being extreme and making whatever his problem is worse by “stripping him of his right” to have an emotional support animal. Am I an a**hole or is his dog’s behavior not justified just because it’s an ESA?

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This furry fiasco highlights a common tension: balancing personal boundaries with a friend’s needs. Dr. Stanley Coren, a noted psychologist and dog behavior expert, explains, “Unlike service dogs, emotional support animals require no specific training, which can lead to behavioral issues in public or private spaces” (Psychology Today). Here, the OP’s frustration is understandable—the dog’s lack of training turns his home into a chaotic mess, undermining any “support” it’s meant to provide.

The OP’s friend seems to misunderstand ESA rights, assuming they grant universal access. In reality, ESAs have limited protections, mainly for housing and air travel, not private homes. The friend’s insistence, backed by a doctor’s letter, doesn’t override the OP’s right to a clean, quiet space. This clash reflects a broader issue: the overuse of ESA designations. A 2018 study in Frontiers in Veterinary Science found a surge in ESA registrations, often with minimal oversight, leading to public skepticism (Frontiers).

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The friend’s dramatic response—texting about needing “time to comprehend”—suggests an attempt to guilt-trip the OP. But the OP’s boundary is fair: a home isn’t a free-for-all for untrained pets. Dr. Coren suggests clear communication to resolve such disputes. The OP could propose meeting in pet-friendly public spaces or urge his friend to invest in basic training. This approach respects the friend’s needs while protecting the OP’s home.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit didn’t hold back, dishing out a mix of cheers and jeers for this canine conundrum. From calling out the friend’s shaky ESA claims to defending the OP’s right to a pee-free floor, the comments are a lively roast of bad doggy manners. Here’s the unfiltered take from the crowd:

[Reddit User] − NTA. This is an untrained emotional support animal, not a service animal. Regardless, this is your private home and you have the right to keep the dog off your property.

ten_before_six − NTA. A doctor needs to write a letter or prescription for an ESA, and they are a legitimate need for some people. But they are NOT the same as service animals for the disabled and don't have all the same legal rights. ESAs have legal protections for airline travel and housing but do NOT have the same public access rights as service animals.

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That is, he can't take his ESA 'wherever he wants.' That's for task trained service animals, not ESAs. Edit to add: And even service animals can be denied public access if they are disruptive, aggressive, or destructive. So he's wrong on all counts.

[Reddit User] − NTA this whole Emotional Support Animal thing is getting out of hand, and sounds like you friend is a s**tty dog owner who can't be bothered to house train his pet.

yokelawns − NTA - friend sounds like he is lying, so many people unnecessarily getting these forms and saying their home pet is an ESA, ESAs should be properly trained and shouldn't be behaving like this. You are right to call your friend out

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pettyprincesspeach − NTA. Service dogs have to be trained rigorously. Emotional support dogs do not. There’s big movement against emotional support animals because literally ANYONE can get one. Like you said, all you have to do is pay a fee and register it online. I could do so right now for my cat and voila, emotional support animal.

If he wants a proper support dog, his dog would have to go through costly training or he’d have to adopta pre-certified dog. A support dog doesn’t bark, doesn’t pee on the floor, doesn’t bother humans when they’re eating, etc. I don’t blame you for not letting the dog in, I wouldn’t either.

pluriplay1 − NTA you’re friend legitimately has an ESA, but he’s treating it like it’s a service animal. Those are very different things. In order to get an ESA you just need a doctors note that essentially says you are better off medically with the animal around.

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The animal requires 0 training where I live to be an ESA, and in certain states (California for me) places that rent you housing have to allow the animal. However, that doesn’t mean I’m allowed to take it into stores & businesses. That’s reserved for service animals, which are specially trained to perform a specific function.

rogeliana − NTA. Could he demand to visit ANYONE'S house because he's got this dog? He can't barge into my house with his dog. He doesn't get to go into your house either.

TotoroSmash − NTA - support animals are supposed to be trained. Also, your home is not a business the law does not obligate you to allow support animals into your home.

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IsitWHILEiPEE − I mean, he doesn't have to come over to your place. I wouldn't want someone to bring a dog over to my place that pisses and shits in my house. NTA

RagaMuffinSun − NTA- I understand that I may get hate for this but I don’t feel you have to allow any animal into your home that is not trained, disruptive, destructive etc... ESAs aren’t allowed anywhere the owner wants and there are rules especially in someone else’s home.

These Redditors backed the OP, slamming the dog’s behavior and clarifying ESA misconceptions. Some called the friend entitled, while others urged the OP to stand firm. But do these hot takes capture the full picture, or are they just barking up the drama tree?

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This tale of a rogue “support” dog shows how quickly a friendship can hit a rough patch over a poorly behaved pet. The OP’s stand for a clean home underscores the importance of boundaries, but it also raises questions about empathy and compromise. Could training or a neutral meetup spot save the day? What would you do if a friend’s pet turned your home into chaos? Drop your thoughts below and let’s keep the conversation going!

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