AITA for asking my sister to replace my ukulele after she ruined it?

In a cozy family home, where the strum of a ukulele once filled the air, a 17-year-old’s simple loan to their sister sparked a storm of its own. After the sister left the cherished instrument outside to be ruined by wind and rain, a request for replacement turned into a family showdown. This Reddit tale hums with the sting of broken trust and the clash of responsibility, served with a bittersweet note of sibling rivalry.

It’s not just about a $40 ukulele it’s about accountability and the weight of promises made. With the teen’s mobility challenges adding a layer of frustration, their stand against their sister’s negligence strikes a chord. As family tensions flare, this story invites us to ponder who’s really out of tune when it comes to respecting others’ belongings.

‘AITA for asking my sister to replace my ukulele after she ruined it?’

Ok so I’m 17 my sister is 20 she’s in college but we both live at home. She asked to borrow my cheap $40 ukulele and I said sure. She said she was using it outside so I said just make sure you bring it back. 8 hours later she was inside, my dad asked why there was a ukulele on the porch.

Her room is closer to the door, I just texted her saying ‘hey bring the ukulele back in’. She said ‘yh dw I will’ so I thought that was that. Two days later I found the ukulele on the ground near the porch (there was a storm so there must’ve been a fairly strong wind) completely ruined. I brought it in and asked my sister to buy me a new one.

This was my first ukulele I’ve had for 10 years and frankly I’m fairly upset that she ruined it. She said it was an accident and she’s not getting me a new one. She also started yelling at me and my dad said I had to apologize to her for asking her to replace it as it was ‘obviously an accident’ despite her lying about going to bring it in twice. So, AITA?

Lending a beloved item can feel like handing over a piece of your heart, and this teen’s ukulele saga shows what happens when trust gets weathered. The sister’s failure to bring the instrument inside, despite reminders, wasn’t just a slip it was negligence that destroyed a sentimental possession. The teen’s request for a replacement was reasonable, yet the sister’s refusal and the dad’s defense reveal a family dynamic skewed toward excusing irresponsibility.

This situation reflects broader issues of accountability in family relationships. A 2019 study in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that unresolved conflicts over personal property can erode trust among siblings. Dr. Jeffrey Bernstein, a family psychologist, notes, “When someone damages another’s property, taking responsibility through replacement or apology rebuilds trust”. Here, the sister’s denial dismisses the teen’s valid feelings.

Bernstein’s insight suggests the sister needs to acknowledge her mistake, perhaps by offering to replace the ukulele or discussing a fair resolution. The teen, meanwhile, could calmly explain the instrument’s sentimental value, especially given their mobility challenges, which made retrieving it themselves difficult. The dad’s role as an enabler could be addressed by encouraging him to support accountability over blind defense of one child.

Practical solutions include setting clear borrowing rules in the family, like written agreements for shared items, or mediating a discussion to ensure mutual respect. This story reminds us that small items can carry big emotional weight, and owning up to mistakes is key to harmony. By standing firm, the teen struck a chord for fairness.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s community strummed a unanimous tune, backing the teen for holding their sister accountable. Users saw the sister’s negligence—ignoring reminders to bring the ukulele inside—as inexcusable, with many calling out the dad for enabling her refusal to take responsibility.

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The consensus highlighted that accidents don’t erase responsibility, especially when borrowing someone’s property. The outpouring of support underscored the importance of respect for others’ belongings, with a few jabs at the sister’s carelessness adding a playful sting to the debate.

PugRexia − NTA It being an 'accident' doesn't absolve you from fixing what you ruined. She asked to use your stuff so she is responsible for its care until she returns it to you, she didn't take care of it and therefore should pay for the damages. That's how the real world works, your dad isn't helping her by not teaching her that lesson.

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cyfermax − She said it was an accident and she’s not getting me a new one.. So if I hit someone with a car by accident I don't have to pay to fix their s**t?. It can be an accident and still her responsibility.. NTA.

DDarlinNikki − NTA - your sister has no sense of responsibility and your dad is an enabler.

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Bean_Boi_666 − I’d say NTA. You told her 3 time to bring it in, and you even had to text her. Same thing happened with my brother a while back but it was a whole collection of Pokémon cards.

BriBriKinz − NTA. Your sister and your dad are both the assholes. Your sister borrowed your belongings and then wrecked it. It being an accident isn't an excuse. She needs to own up for what she did and replace it. It's her fault for being so careless. Your dad should be teaching your sister that if you ruin someone else's belongings then they should replace it.

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My roommate's boyfriend drunkenly broke my friends wine glass holder of a white tiger and immediately went on Amazon and bought her a new one. That is how your sister should be acting instead of being huffy and saying it was an accident but not doing anything to fix her mistake.. After this dilemma, if so were you I wouldn't ever let her borrow anything ever again.

ShoddyCheesecake − NTA. Negligence isn't an accident, she was just too lazy to bring it in.. She sounds like a lousy borrower. Don't loan her your stuff again. :/

mortalsuffering − This feels like a validation post... You know you’re not an a**hole for asking her to replace it, you just want people to back you up

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morhp − Obvious NTA, it doesn't even matter if it was an accident or not, if you ruin something that you've borrowed from someone else, you replace it.

WVildandWVonderful − NTA. It wasn't an accident (you reminded her to bring it in); it was negligence. And you shouldn't have to remind someone who borrowed your stuff to take care of it.. She's an adult and needs to do the right thing here. And also learn respect for other people's s**t.

SaltzerPoo − NTA, you asked her to bring it in and she said she would, but didn't.

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This ukulele uproar shows how a small oversight can hit a sour note in family ties. The teen’s push for a replacement wasn’t just about a $40 instrument it was about respect and accountability. With the sister dodging blame and the dad playing referee, it’s a reminder that owning mistakes matters. Have you dealt with broken promises or ruined belongings in your family? Share your stories below let’s riff on how we keep harmony at home!

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