AITA for asking my friend to leave my birthday party because she brought her crying baby?

At birthday parties, the vibe is everything—laughter, good food, and lively conversations are meant to fill the room. But sometimes, unexpected disruptions can quickly derail even the best-laid plans. In this story, a 27-year-old woman hosted a low-key birthday bash in her apartment, inviting close friends for an evening of snacks, drinks, and fun.

Everything was running smoothly until one of her dear friends, Sarah, arrived with her 7‑month‑old baby. Though the host loves Sarah and understands the challenges of motherhood, she wasn’t prepared for a crying baby that set off a chain reaction of awkwardness and discomfort among the guests.

With the baby’s incessant crying dominating the atmosphere for nearly an hour, the host found herself torn between compassion and protecting her own right to enjoy her celebration. In an effort to restore the party’s energy, she asked Sarah to step outside with her baby until things calmed down—a request that ultimately led to a rift between the two friends.

‘AITA for asking my friend to leave my birthday party because she brought her crying baby?’

Relationship expert Dr. Laura Markham observes, “Clear communication and setting boundaries are essential in any social setting. When unexpected issues arise, it’s important to address them calmly and respectfully.” Dr. Markham explains that while parenting can be unpredictable, hosting an event comes with the expectation of maintaining a certain atmosphere, especially at an adult gathering. “It’s reasonable for a host to ask that disruptions be minimized so all guests can enjoy the occasion,” she adds.

Dr. Markham further emphasizes, “If a guest brings along a baby to an event without prior discussion about childcare arrangements, it can lead to misunderstandings. While empathy is important, so is honoring the host’s plans. In these situations, a quick discussion before the event might prevent last-minute conflicts.” She suggests that both parties could benefit from discussing expectations ahead of time. “A balance can be struck where a parent’s needs are respected without overshadowing the purpose of the gathering.”

Lastly, she advises, “If emotions run high during the event, it might help to have a neutral party mediate. This not only preserves the friendship but ensures that everyone’s needs are considered fairly.” Her insights underline the importance of mutual understanding and proactive planning to avoid such disputes in the future.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

One redditor explained that it’s not the host’s responsibility to babysit, especially at an adult event. They pointed out that if a parent can’t organize proper childcare and ends up bringing a fussy baby, the consequences are on the parent—not on the party host.

They stressed that a birthday party is for adults to enjoy and if the baby’s constant crying disrupts the mood, it’s fair to ask the parent to step outside until the situation improves. They firmly believe that responsibility for managing a child lies solely with the parent.

This incident isn’t just about a frozen meal or a minor party disruption—it’s about the delicate balance of respecting personal boundaries while accommodating real-life challenges like parenting. While our host’s decision to ask her friend to step outside might seem harsh to some, it’s clear she was trying to safeguard her own experience on her special day.

What do you think? Should hosts be held accountable for maintaining the party vibe even when unexpected disruptions occur, or is it reasonable to expect parents to manage their children’s behavior? Share your thoughts and experiences—what would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation?