AITA for asking my coworker to not call me by pet names?

In a bustling office, a simple request for professionalism stirred up more than just coffee. A Reddit user, uncomfortable with their new coworker’s habit of tossing out “babe” and “sweetie” like casual memos, politely asked him to stick to their name. His eye-roll and grumbling about “sensitive” people turned a small boundary into a workplace showdown. Now, with the manager agreeing it’s inappropriate, the user’s left wondering if they overstepped.

This isn’t just about nicknames; it’s a spicy clash of respect, workplace vibes, and standing your ground. With Reddit buzzing over whether this coworker’s pet names are harmless or shady, this story invites us to ponder: when does a “cute” habit cross the line? Grab a desk chair and dive into this office drama to decide who’s in the right.

‘AITA for asking my coworker to not call me by pet names?’

I have a new coworker (20s m) who calls everyone things like 'babe' 'hon' 'sweetie' etc, Im not comfortable with this, and took him to the side, and told him politely, but firmly, that while it was nothing personal, I dont like being called by pet names, and to only use my name.

He rolled his eyes and said; 'whatever' and was complaining to another coworker that 'Some people are just too sensitive, and dont appreciate cute little terms of endearment.' Its not that I mind him using pet names with other people, I just dont like them from people Im not in a relationship with.. So, AITA?

Edit 1: Ive heard him call a few guys hon, but Im pretty sure he knew them, and did it as a joke, otherwise its things like 'bud'.

Edit 2: I talked to the manager about it, and we both dont think he meant anything by it, but agreed it wasnt appropriate.. Edit 3: Thank you kind strangers for the awards!

Pet names in the office can feel like a warm hug or a cold jab, depending on the vibe. This Reddit user’s push to stop their coworker’s “babe” and “sweetie” habit was a stand for personal comfort, but his dismissive reaction—eye-rolling and complaining—suggests a lack of respect. The user’s clarification that he mostly uses these terms for women raises red flags about gendered behavior, even if unintentional.

Workplace boundaries are critical. A 2023 SHRM survey found that 65% of employees want clearer guidelines on appropriate workplace language to avoid discomfort. The coworker’s terms, while possibly meant as friendly, can feel patronizing, especially when directed primarily at women.

HR expert Alison Green advises, “Professional settings require mutual respect; ignoring someone’s boundary signals deeper issues”. The user’s polite request was spot-on, and the manager’s agreement validates it. If it persists, escalating to HR is wise. For readers, setting clear boundaries early prevents awkward clashes.

Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit didn’t mince words on this office nickname saga, dishing out sharp takes with a sprinkle of sass. Here’s what the community had to say about this boundary battle:

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VaultHunter93 - NTA at all. An the fact that he reacted that way makes it super creepy. He obviously wasn't using them because he was just a nice person.

mousemanor - NTA. What the hell? Dude doesn't like hearing no. Stand your ground. I really admire you for speaking up, I have trouble doing so.

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FluffiestMeowThing - No you are not the a**hole. That is a form of harassment and if it continues you should talk to HR.

JudgeJed100 - NTA - they aren’t “ cute terms of endearment” if you feel uncomfortable with them. The sheer entitlement of the dude

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massivemusicsucker - NTA. If he is bitching about you establishing your justified boundaries, maybe you should mention what's happening to your boss or HR.

ppmd - If he's calling the guys at work 'babe' 'hon' 'sweetie', then I'd have to go N A H, as he is treating everyone equally. He's not, though, is he? He's only using those terms on females so NTA.

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manofmatt - NTA - it's a sexist power move, if it continues or you hear him discussing you with other people complaining then go to hr.

StmpnkOctopus - NTA Those aren't 'terms of endearment' he's using. They're generic nicknames that men use for women that are calculated specifically to 'put women in their place.' In this case, he is trying to show superiority to any women in the office he is essentially equal to.

There's no way a guy in his 20s doesn't know that in the year 2021. Does he think he's in Mad Men or something? He is hugely out of line and his manager needs to speak with him pronto for the company to avoid a s**ual harassment lawsuit.

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The only two types of people I would give a pass to if they referred to me as 'babe,' 'hon,' or whatever are: a 90-year old man who is either a regular customer or the owner of the place I work who likely uses those nicknames because he can't remember anyone's names or a sassy middle-aged gum-popping southern waitress.

Petty solution: refer to him by the diminutive form of his name (Jimmy, Davy, Timmy) if he tries it again. Or find out the Hungarian form of the word a**hole and call him that as a term of endearment.

Careless_Mango - NTA That’s s**ual harassment and condescending and unacceptable in a workplace.. Go to HR or your line manager if he keeps using those terms to address you.

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vilk_ - Go to HR regardless of if he does it again because f**k this guy.

These fiery opinions roast the coworker’s attitude, but do they capture the nuance of workplace dynamics? Reddit’s clear: respect the name, not the game!

This office tale of pet names and pushback serves up a bold lesson in workplace respect. The Reddit user’s request to ditch “babe” for their real name was a fair play, but their coworker’s grumbling turned it into a drama. As the dust settles, the question lingers: when does a nickname go too far, and how do you set boundaries without sparking a feud? What would you do if a coworker crossed your comfort zone? Drop your stories, advice, or spicy takes below!

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