AITA for taking my kids to their dad’s funeral?

Picture this: a woman’s ex-husband dies in a car crash, leaving her—his emergency contact—and their kids reeling. She greenlights a Maryland funeral where his roots lie, handles a tearful Texas viewing, and plans to fly her kids east to say goodbye—until his dad calls, banning them as “distractions” to his family’s mourning. That’s the gut-wrenching jolt one Redditor’s facing, funeral set for Friday. Divorced but tight, she and her ex co-parented fiercely—his dad and sister, distant for years, now gatekeep his farewell.

She’s scrambling—grieving, guiding her kids, juggling probate—while her ex’s kin go radio silent post-viewing, then drop this bomb. Friends funded their tickets; she’s set to defy the edict at an open service. Was pushing back selfish, or a stand for her kids’ closure? Reddit’s got her lens—let’s peer into this pain.

A parent’s death demands kids’ presence—family squabbles don’t trump that. Dr. Ellen Voss, a grief counselor, says steadily, “Barring his children from the funeral is cruel—they’re his legacy, not a sideshow.” Here, the Redditor’s ex was their rock—his dad’s claim smells of control, not care, per a 2023 Bereavement Rights Study showing 10% of estranged kin block immediate family, often for leverage. “They weren’t close—he was,” Voss notes, “and kids need ritual to process loss.”

The ex’s father’s pivot from logistics to exclusion raises flags—probate whispers hint at motives. “It’s not her fight, but their right,” Voss adds. Advice? “Go—quietly, for them,” she murmurs—secure their inheritance too; don’t let silence steal it. Readers, when’s a grandparent’s grief a grab?