AITA for “having an intervention” about my husband’s parenting?

We have a 10-week-old baby, and while my husband (28M) adores him, his parenting methods have been dangerously careless. Despite his genuine love and desire to be a great dad, he repeatedly engages in unsafe behaviors—like falling asleep on the couch while baby is in contact napping, leaving the baby unattended on the playmat with the dog in the room, and even putting the baby down for a nap with his bib still on.

I’ve been extremely anxious about these behaviors, and after several warnings, I reached my breaking point. I enlisted the help of my MIL and SIL to “have an intervention” about his parenting, which left him feeling attacked and humiliated. Now, he’s furious that I involved his family, and I’m questioning if I overstepped. Am I the a**hole for insisting on safer practices for our baby—even if it meant staging an intervention?

‘AITA for “having an intervention” about my husband’s parenting?’

Family and pediatric experts emphasize that infant safety should be non-negotiable. Dr. Emily Vargas, a family therapist, explains that while it’s natural for new parents to sometimes make mistakes, repeatedly engaging in unsafe practices can be hazardous. “When a parent’s behavior directly endangers an infant’s safety, intervention is not only justified but necessary,” she states. Dr. Robert Hensley, a pediatrician,

adds that practices like co-sleeping in unsafe positions or leaving a baby unattended in the presence of pets significantly increase risks. He notes that educating parents about safe sleep and caregiving guidelines is crucial, especially during those vulnerable first months of a child’s life. Relationship expert Dr. Karen Jensen emphasizes that effective parenting requires both partners to work together and listen to each other’s concerns.

“It’s important for couples to address safety issues calmly and constructively; however,  if one partner’s actions consistently jeopardize the child’s well-being, a firmer approach is warranted,” she explains. Additionally, sleep researcher Dr. Monica Patel highlights that sleep deprivation can impair judgment,

which makes it all the more important to establish and adhere to safe routines for the baby. Overall, these experts agree that while my husband’s intentions may be good, his actions are risky and need to change—and that involving trusted family members to reinforce these safety standards can be a necessary wake-up call.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

The Reddit community overwhelmingly supports my stance. Many commenters noted that the safety of our baby must come first, and that my husband’s repeated disruptions and unsafe habits are not acceptable. Comments such as “NTA, your baby’s life is at risk” and “Better a temporarily hurt ego than a permanently injured baby” echo throughout the discussion.

Users have shared personal experiences and cited statistics about infant safety to emphasize that a parent’s negligence, even if unintentional, can have dire consequences. While some advise apologizing for the intervention approach, the consensus is clear: when a child’s well-being is endangered, it’s crucial to take strong, decisive action—even if it means temporarily damaging feelings.

In conclusion, I firmly believe I’m not the a**hole for having an intervention about my husband’s unsafe parenting practices. While he wants to be an amazing father, his methods are endangering our baby, and repeated warnings have gone unheeded. My actions, though forceful, were driven by a deep concern for our child’s safety.

I’m committed to a partnership where both parents take responsibility for protecting our little one, and sometimes that means calling in the reinforcements from family. How would you handle a situation where your child’s safety is compromised by a partner’s behavior? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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