AITA for pressing charges?

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Imagine waking up to a birthday surprise—not the fun kind with balloons and cake, but the kind where your shiny new car looks like it lost a fight with a grocery store prank aisle. One Redditor stumbled into this nightmare when their 18-year-old cousin turned a “no” into a full-on vandalism spree. Eggs, toilet paper, and a family feud later, this tale’s got more twists than a teen drama—complete with legal charges and a whole lot of finger-pointing.

Our story kicks off with a freshly leased Ford Escape, a disappointed birthday girl, and a cousin who’s not about to play chauffeur. When the Redditor denied a joyride request, the fallout was epic—think baked egg yolk and TP streamers ruining a pristine paint job. Security footage caught the culprit red-handed, and now the family’s in chaos. Was pressing charges too harsh, or just desserts? Buckle up for the full scoop below!

‘AITA for pressing charges?’

My cousin turned 18 recently. She’s in high school. She doesn’t have a car, and during her birthday weekend, thought her parents were going to buy her one. They didn’t get her one and she was pretty upset. I should note that I’m not very close with my cousin. Or the rest of my extended family for that matter. I only heard about this through the grapevine from my dad. Anyway.

My cousin texts me on the Friday before her birthday asking if she can take my car (I just leased a new Ford escape) to the mall and then for an out of town road trip with her friends over the weekend. I tell her no. She begs and pleads with me. I tell her no again. My car is for me to drive and for me only. If she wants her own car she can save up and buy one.

She calls me a b**ch and says that I ruined her birthday and that she’s embarrassed because her friends think she got a car for her birthday and she doesn’t have one. I don’t respond to her and think nothing of it. The weekend comes and I sleep in very late on that Saturday, waking up at 1:00 pm (don’t judge lol).

Even though my car is parked in my driveway and my gate is closed, I come to realize that someone egged and TP’d my car. With many, many eggs and 5-6 rolls of TP. And since the weather was warm outside, the raw egg baked into my car, along with the dried up toilet paper, destroying the paint.

Since I have security cameras around my house, I decide to go back and watch. At around nine thirtyish that morning, I see my cousin and a bunch of her stupid friends vandalizing my car. I’m surprise she didn’t smash the windows and poke holes in the tires too. To save my post from the 3000 character limit, I obviously pressed charges and my cousin is in legal trouble.

Her and her parents are pissed off at me for pressing charges, her parents telling me that she’s “just a kid” and that she’s been through a lot of ‘emotional stress’ doing virtual schooling for this past year and that I should take that into consideration, and that I should be ashamed of myself for pressing legal charges against my baby cousin, that I’m almost 30 and dont I remember what I was like at that age?

(I do remember, and I wasn’t stupid enough to egg anyone’s car) and can’t she work something out with me like doing chores around my house for money if I drop the charges... that she’s young, that she doesn’t need a felony on her record, etc. and that it was just a prank. Right after I press charges, my cousin was calling and texting me over and over saying that this could’ve been avoided had I let her take my car.. Am I the a**hole in this situation?

I need to add that my cousin already has a felony on her record, a DUI. She’s not remorseful of anything. Also, my aunt and uncle will not pay me for the damages. They just want me to drop the charges and pay for everything myself like nothing happened. They are cheap.

Nothing says “family bonding” like a good old-fashioned car-egging, right? This Redditor’s cousin took entitlement to a new level, turning a birthday letdown into a driveway disaster. The Redditor’s stance? My car, my rules—and now, my lawsuit. The cousin’s parents cry “she’s just a kid,” but with a DUI already on her rap sheet, this 18-year-old’s not exactly a rookie in the consequences game. Let’s peel back the layers.

The Redditor’s in a tough spot. Saying “no” to a car loan shouldn’t mean scrubbing egg off your hood—especially on a lease that’s barely broken in. The cousin’s tantrum reeks of entitlement, and her “you made me do it” defense is flimsier than wet TP. But the family’s plea for leniency tugs at the heartstrings—nobody wants a felony haunting their “baby cousin.” Still, chores as payback? That’s not fixing a paint job; that’s sweeping the issue under the rug.

This mess mirrors a broader trend. A 2022 National Institute of Justice report notes juvenile property crimes often spike with parental enabling—think kids who’ve never heard “no” sticking around. Here, the aunt and uncle’s refusal to pony up for damages screams coddling. Psychologist Dr. Wendy Walsh weighs in: “Boundaries are critical for young adults; without them, accountability falters” (source). The cousin’s prior DUI and zero remorse suggest she’s missed that memo—big time.

So, was pressing charges overkill? Not really. The Redditor’s protecting their turf, and legal consequences might be the wake-up call this teen needs. That said, a pre-charge family powwow could’ve softened the blow—though with this crew, good luck getting a dime. A compromise like restitution over jail time might balance justice and mercy. Readers, what’s your call? Is this tough love or a family feud gone too far?

See what others had to share with OP:

Reddit’s dishing out takes hotter than a summer egg bake—dive in! [comment block] Are these comments pure gold or just online popcorn chatter?

pennywhistlesmoonpie − NTA. Sure, you could have spoken with them first before pressing charges, but that last sentence was very telling. That she would text you and basically retroactively threaten you to let her take the car or she’d vandalize it says a lot about her character, and she’d probably have charges pressed against her at some point in the future anyway.

Hopefully she learns a lesson to avoid that happening again. Also, chores around the house to make up for it? It’s called community service ordered by the judge.

[Reddit User] − NTA please update us as well, I wanna hear her suffering the consequences of her actions.

bethsophia − NTA. I was

SomethingClever70 − NTA. Your cousin is a gaping a**hole for blaming you, and her parents are assholes for enabling her BS. Press charges and make her pay for the damage.

LunaPick − NTA she's 18 and is an adult.. If she's going to act like that she can deal with the consequences.

pepper_amore − She lied to her friends, refused to accept no for an answer, trespassed and committed vandalism and property damage.....and YOU are the a**hole??..... I'm trying desperately to understand that leap..... anyone else??

allilivefor − NTA. She's not

DaiZzedandConFuZed − NTA. She decided to do something criminal because you said “no” and her parents are trying to enable her. Her excuse is... well if you didn’t say no I wouldn’t have done it? No. You are not to blame for this.

HowardProject − NTA. And the fact that she's *BLAMING YOU* because you refused to lend her the car says that her parents have been running interference for her entitled behavior for too long.. She's 18, she's a legal adult - play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

BandicootBroad2250 − NTA. And with how enabling her parents are, I am genuinely surprised they didn’t get her a car.

From a birthday bust to a legal dust-up, this Redditor’s tale is a cautionary carwash nightmare. Was pressing charges a fair flex against a reckless cousin, or did they oversteer into family drama? How would you handle a teen tornado with no regrets? Hit the comments with your hot takes—we’re all ears!

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One Comment

  1. She’s a very entitled & manipulative AH , with AH ‘s for parents and no wonder they wouldn’t buy her a car . She must be delusional as well and I hope they do make her repay the damages .

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