WIBTA If we forbid an obese girl to take part at a scouting trip to Norway?

A scout leader considers banning a 16-year-old girl from a Norway hiking trip. The two-week trip involves rigorous 10-20 km daily hikes, and the girl, weighing 130 kg, struggled during a test event, quitting after 5 km. Her inability to continue could halt her group, impacting everyone’s experience due to the scout “leave no one behind” ethos. The leader worries about fairness to others and safety risks.

Despite discussions with her parents urging daily training, the girl hasn’t prepared adequately, and pickup isn’t feasible daily. With the trip three weeks away, the leader fears her participation could ruin the group’s holiday. Reddit debates balancing inclusion with practicality. Would excluding her be unfair? How can leaders ensure safety without alienating scouts?

‘WIBTA If we forbid an obese girl to take part at a scouting trip to Norway?’

The trip involves intense hiking:

As mentionend in the title i am a scout leader from germany. This year is a huge trip to Norway for all scouts between the age of 12 to 18....

The girl struggled in a test event:

No problem for most of them, but there's one girl that keeps us worrying. She's 16 yo and weights about 130 kg. There was a test event where everyone carried...

The trip is in 3 weeks and i know that she cant make it. Problem is: If she stays somewhere and cant go on, nobody in her group does, because...

In my opinion its unfair that the whole group needs to f__k up their trip and hollidays just because of one unfit girl. She knew that she is not capable...

WIBTA if we forbid her to take part because she would destroy the trip for everyone else?. Ps. Sorry for bad grammar i'm still learning ;)

She hasn’t trained despite warnings:

Edit: we already talked to her parents an her saying that she needs to train every day but it seems like she's not doing it at all. And its not...

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The scout leader’s consideration to exclude the 16-year-old girl from the Norway trip prioritizes safety and fairness for the group. The demanding 10-20 km daily hikes require physical stamina, and her inability to complete a 5 km test hike with equipment indicates significant risks. If she cannot continue, the scout ethos of staying together could delay or derail the entire group’s experience, affecting seven other scouts and potentially compromising safety in remote areas.

Her lack of preparation, despite parental discussions, suggests she may not fully grasp the trip’s physical demands. The leader’s frustration is valid, as her participation could lead to health risks or group resentment, especially given the financial and emotional investment of other families (Kerr & Price, 2016). However, singling her out based on weight risks stigmatization, and her failure to train may reflect deeper motivational or health issues.

The leader must approach this sensitively to avoid alienating the girl or her family. Focusing on her test performance rather than her weight ensures the decision is objective. A retest could clarify her current fitness level, but her prior failure and lack of training suggest she’s unlikely to meet the standard. The leader’s responsibility is to ensure all scouts’ safety, which may necessitate her exclusion if she cannot keep up.

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To address this, the leader should hold a transparent meeting with the girl and her parents, explaining the fitness requirements and safety concerns. Offering an alternative, less strenuous scout activity could maintain her involvement. Implementing a standard fitness test for all future trips would prevent similar conflicts. A compassionate approach, coupled with clear communication, balances inclusion with the group’s safety and enjoyment.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit backs the leader’s concerns, urging safety-first decisions with spirited debate.

Many support excluding her for safety reasons:

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Mojojojo3030 - NTA—I think you handled it perfectly. You made an objective test and she didn't pass.

thiscouldbemassive - NTA. She's not physically up to this trip. You can't put her at risk by taking her and it's not fair to the other kids.

RamblingManUK - NTA. You'd be TA if you did take her. It's a 10-20km per day hiking trip. If she can't manage more than 5km then she simply can't go....

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It would be unfair on the others because they wouldn't get anything even close to the trip they were promised and it would be unfair on her because she is...

[Reddit User] - I’m enormously fat. I’ve had two spiral fractures of my right tibia basically because when I hit the ground the bone goes snap. If she falls or...

Never mind her being able to keep up. ... If she was fat but fit and doing the training and ready to carry her gear and do 20 km a...

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Some suggest a retest for fairness:

Cipher_3 - NTA but is there any chance you could set up another stamina test as a requirement? Like, if they can’t pass it they can’t go? Might be easier...

And if she’s supposedly been training for a month, then a retest would make sense, anyway. If that’s not possible, I’d say you’re fine with telling them she can’t go....

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valandrice - NTA If she’s unable to do the hike and it would force the rest of her group to stay behind, ruining their time, you have reason to refuse....

Socialbutterfinger - NTA. Do another test, call it a dress rehearsal to make sure everyone has their gear and can pack/unpack it. Hike 10k or a set distance and set...

Be clear that this is also a test and anyone who can’t do the hike is out of the trip. Also offer that anyone can now voluntarily change their mind...

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Yaaauw - Maybe, for bureaucracy sake, set up a test where scouts have to complete it in order to be able to go on the trip. She doesn't complete it,...

And you should probably just keep the test in place from now on. Not only does it prevent a repeat of this situation, it's also an extra safety measure so...

Others emphasize group dynamics and fairness:

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[Reddit User] - NTA - scout mentality might mean you're all in together as a group, but don't for one second think that other kids won't resent the ever loving...

snakeinsheepclothes - NTA but for me the parents are, they let her go to 130 kg. You have seen that she isn’t fit for it, so she should stay home.

If her parents would care better for her they would see that it would a health risk for her to go from zero to hiking 15 km a day and...

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sorrylilsis - NTA. She simply is not fit enough for the hike. Seriously it's time to go up the chain and tell her she can't come. I've done a lot...

I've been in were when we had to pick up someone who had vastly overestimated her level. Took us 5 hours getting her down the via ferrata she had got...

Some criticize the leader’s tone and professionalism:

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LumpyGenitals - NTA, but not because of your other comments. You made an objective test, she failed, and at this point she would be a liability, not just for the...

There's a reason trips like these have an expectation of fitness. BUT, reading your other comments, I think you have a lot to work on regarding professionalism and thoughts towards...

I'm fit, but I used to be fat - if I had heard what you were saying to me at that age I would've been devastated. While you're not an...

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njinok - More info. Are you able to sit her and her parents down and state that this is a tough walk with no quitting? If she does come along,...

nickmcgimmick - I do not understand how she failed the test yet is still able to be signed up for the trip.

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The scout leader’s dilemma over excluding a 16-year-old girl from a strenuous Norway hiking trip weighs safety against inclusion. Her failure in a test hike and lack of training raise concerns about her health and the group’s experience, given the scout ethos of staying together.

Reddit supports prioritizing safety but urges sensitivity. Would the leader be wrong to exclude the girl from the trip? How can scout leaders balance inclusion with group safety? Share your thoughts below!

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