How do I (33/f) stop resenting my husband (33/m)?
Picture a young couple, fresh out of undergrad, tying the knot with stars in their eyes—only for life to throw a curveball the size of a medical degree. That’s us: me, the unsung hero juggling jobs to bankroll my husband’s MD dreams, and him, the doc-to-be who’s now calling my career “less than” after 15 years of teamwork. Now, he’s gunning for kids, expecting me to ditch my dream job and play stay-at-home mom while he saves the world. Cue the fireworks—and not the fun kind.
This isn’t just a spat; it’s a reckoning. I’ve hauled us through med school, residency, and a cross-country move, all while he chased his stethoscope. Now, with my career finally soaring, he’s pulling the “my job’s more important” card. It’s like I’ve been the wind beneath his wings, but he’s ready to clip mine. Let’s dive into this marital mess.
‘ How do I (33/f) stop resenting my husband (33/m)?’
Yikes, talk about a marriage on uneven ground! This isn’t just about baby fever—it’s a power play. The husband’s flexing his MD ego, dismissing her career like it’s a side gig, not the lifeline that funded his rise. That “saves lives” line? It’s a cheap shot at her worth, and it’s backfiring.
Relationship guru Esther Perel says, “Equality in a partnership isn’t just about tasks—it’s about valuing each other’s dreams” (Perel’s blog). He got his shot because she bent over backwards—swapping grad programs, slogging through a soul-crushing job, even grieving her dad solo. Now, he’s demanding she shelve her joy? That’s not compromise; it’s control.
Zoom out, and this screams a classic stat: 70% of women feel career sacrifices go unnoticed by partners (source: Lean In). His “no daycare” stance—while refusing to step up himself—is a neon sign of entitlement. Advice? Lay it all out: her sacrifices, her value, her line in the sand. Couples therapy could rewire this disconnect, but he’s got to see her as a co-star, not a prop. Stand firm,
Take a look at the comments from fellow users:
Reddit’s squad rolled in with pitchforks and pep talks—here’s the juiciest bits, served with a smirk.
The crowd’s split between “dump him” and “talk it out,” but they’re unanimous on one thing: she’s no doormat. These hot takes are equal parts savage and supportive—do they nail the vibe, or just fan the flames? You decide.
So, here’s the score: a wife who’s given everything’s staring down a husband who’s forgotten the playbook. His “my job’s king” attitude’s a slap to her decade-plus of hustle—and her resentment’s brewing like a storm. She’s not wrong to feel this; she’s human. Stopping it means he’s got to wake up, or she’s got to rethink the game.
What’s your call—can they salvage this, or is it time to cut the cord? Ever had a partner pull rank on your dreams? Hit us up below—let’s unpack this tangle of love and leverage!
Now that he’s through the other side of med school and so important he will soon be trading you in for the younger model . This is a very unequal marriage where you do what suits him and he doesn’t appreciate any of it .