AITA for wearing crop tops and tanks to annoy a Mormon teammate after she shamed me for wearing them?

The sun beats down on a California track, where sweat and determination collide. For one 16-year-old runner, the heat is a familiar foe—she’s fainted before, so her tank tops and shorts are more than a style choice; they’re a necessity. But when her Mormon teammate, Suzie, calls her outfit “immoral” and slings a shocking insult, the track becomes a battleground of beliefs and boundaries. What happens when personal expression clashes with religious conviction?

This fiery exchange has Reddit buzzing, with opinions as varied as the team’s uniforms. Our young runner, hurt but defiant, doubles down with crop tops to make a point. Was she wrong to push back, or is this a bold stand for self-expression? Let’s dive into her story, the community’s take, and what experts say about navigating such clashes.

‘AITA for wearing crop tops and tanks to annoy a Mormon teammate after she shamed me for wearing them?’

So I (16f) am on the track team and previously did cross country with this girl 'Suzie' (16f). She's Mormon, and is pretty religious and conservative. For example in the 75 degree heat, she'll wear long sleeves and leggings, because regular running clothes are 'immoral.' I have Mormon friends who don't do this, and they will wear tank tops, crop tops, shorts, etc.

Suzie and I aren't close, but our coach recently made her part of the 4 x 100 meter relay with me, so we practice together a lot now. I wear a lot of tank tops, spaghetti straps, crop tops, and short shorts to school, and my running clothes are a tank top and some running shorts.

I've fainted from heat a few times, so I try and stay as cool as possible when I run. At practice on Monday I wore a tank top that was a bit low-cut, and some shorts with mesh cutouts. Suzie came up to me and asked me to please change. I asked why, and she said, 'It makes me uncomfortable to see you walk around in that outfit. Y

ou look like a s**t, and are being immoral. I've tried to put up with you, but it's very hard to ignore your...' (she looked pointedly at my chest) '...flashy clothing, especially with all the boys here.' I said '*Excuse me*?! In case you haven't noticed, you're the only one who's wearing long sleeves!

I don't give two sh\*ts about what guys think, I don't want to pass out and go to the hospital!' I was kinda loud/harsh when saying this, and Suzie sort of flounced away looking self-righteous. So on Tuesday, I wore a spaghetti strap tank to practice,

and today I wore a crop top (I don't always wear these, but they are a part of my wardrobe). I was complaining to my friend about what Suzie did, and said 'Oh, I hope this is *immoral* enough for her now!' Suzie was walking by, and heard it, and glared at me, and mouthed 's**t'.

My friend said she was way out of line with the original comment, but by purposely wearing clothes I knew would annoy her, I was just being an AH and taking it too far.  But I was honestly shocked when Suzie called me a s**t. It's never happened to me before, and I couldn't believe that a girl my age who I'd known since middle school was saying it.

Maybe I did take it too far, but I was angry, surprised and hurt. I could be an AH since Suzie does believe in covering up bc of her religious beliefs, and I feel slightly bad for purposely trying to make her mad because of them.. so reddit, AITA?

EDIT: Just want to say that this is not totally bc of Suzie's religion. Her parents are very conservative and h**ophobic/misogynistic on their own, and also are very very religious too. They cut her brother's face out of photos and told people they just had 5 kids after he came out. EDIT 2: For everyone who is asking, I'm in California not Utah.

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Our town doesn't have a huge Mormon community- it's Suzie's family and like 2 others. EDIT 3: Thank you for all your help guys! I talked to my coaches about this, and my friend who lives near Suzie told our counselor that she was worried about Suzie & her siblings after what happened to her brother. I'm gonna log off now and go back to my main, but I really appreciate the help!

This track team spat is more than a wardrobe war—it’s a clash of personal and cultural values. Suzie’s harsh words reflect her upbringing, but shaming a teammate crosses a line. According to Dr. John Duffy, a clinical psychologist specializing in teen dynamics, “Judgmental comments, especially in a team setting, can erode trust and cohesion” . Here, Suzie’s insult stems from her conservative lens, but it unfairly targets the OP’s practical clothing choice.

The OP’s response—doubling down with crop tops—packs a sarcastic punch but risks escalating tension. Teens often use defiance to assert identity, especially when feeling attacked. Data from the American Psychological Association shows 70% of teens face peer judgment over appearance, making this a broader issue of self-expression versus conformity.

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Dr. Duffy advises, “Open dialogue, not retaliation, fosters understanding.” The OP could calmly explain her health-driven clothing choices to Suzie, setting boundaries without malice. Coaches should also step in—team environments thrive on mutual respect, not moral policing.

Respecting beliefs doesn’t mean surrendering personal comfort. The OP’s health concerns justify her attire, and Suzie’s discomfort doesn’t trump that. Encouraging empathy, like asking Suzie why she feels strongly, could defuse tension while maintaining team unity.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, dishing out support with a side of sass. Here’s the raw scoop from the trackside peanut gallery:

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thedarkpup − NTA. Suzie gets to decide how she dresses, not how you dress. She shouldn’t have shamed you. Your anger is justified.

1Tallboi − NTA. Report her to your coach

georgethealbinofish − NTA. You made your point very clear to her and that was your intention, so honestly no shame there! Also with your health on the line, it’s not unusual for runners to wear crop tops. My high school girls track/cross country team wore crop tops and Speedo like shorts in competitions because of heat reasons,

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and the fact that extra clothing can add even the slightest amount of time to your running time. More power to ya! And obviously your teammate can wear whatever she wants for whatever reason she wants...but she can’t enforce her rules on others.

[Reddit User] − NTA - Please report this girl to the coach & possibly the principal. S**t shaming (I know you aren’t a s**t) is considered s**ual harassment. I find it odd this holier than thou girl is the only one staring/looking at you & commenting on your attire. If it truly bothered her she would stop looking. If she can’t stop looking then she should quit the team.

By the way, the word “modest” means “to not call attention to one’s self.” I know some people running track dress the way she does but what you wear is normal in your context. Therefore it is modest. Please do not quote Scripture to her. Mormons do not believe the Bible is the word of God. They believe The Book of Mormon is the ultimate authority, followed by The Pearl of Great Price.

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lolat90 − NTA, her religion has no place in your wardrobe. One of my favorite sayings is “Religion is like a penis, it’s okay to be proud of it, but it is not okay to shove down other people’s throats.”

justaweightedblanket − NTA. I've done track and it gets blazing hot where I live. Also, you've previously fainted from being overheated. Is she suggesting you cover up at the expense of your own health?

blondie-- − NTA. Tell the coach what she's been calling you. That is disgusting and unacceptable. You could point out that your religion or lack thereof didn't think of black people as subhuman until the 70s if you're being petty

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[Reddit User] − NTA- She deserved what she got. And she’s a major a**hole for trying to dictate what you wear. Mormons are just f**king crazy sometimes. You should tell the teacher that she made those comments towards you. She’s s**t shaming and bullying you and has probably done this to other girls do. If she said this s**t to a girl in the workplace, she could get fired. This behavior is 100% wrong.

spider-gwen89 − NTA. Show her the image in this article, from one of BYU’s (college owned by the LDS church) official sports pages. This is BYU’s uniform for their cross country team, and they are wearing normal running attire. If it’s good enough for the school owned by her church, they she shouldn’t be giving you a hard time.. [BYU Women’s Cross Country]

royalic − Eh. No, you're not the a**hole. I grew up in a situation that valued modesty above all else. Girls, and boys, were trained to look for immodest clothing so the girls didn't tempt the boys. When you're trained to look for it, it stands out, a lot.

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It took me years to deprogram. What helped was comments from friends, and my own realization, that what I was saying/thinking was mean, and nobody else was thinking that.. If she's being 'tempted' you should reassuringly take her hand and point her to some LGBTQ resources.

These hot takes show Reddit rallying behind the OP, cheering her stance while slamming Suzie’s judgment. Some urged reporting the incident, others pointed to BYU’s own runners rocking similar gear. But do these fiery comments capture the full picture, or are they just fueling the drama?

This track team tale shows how quickly personal choices can spark conflict. The OP stood her ground, prioritizing health over judgment, but her clapback stirred the pot. Suzie’s words were out of line, yet both girls are navigating the messy terrain of teenage identity. With expert advice pointing to dialogue and empathy, there’s a path to mutual respect. What would you do if a teammate tried to dictate your style? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

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