AITA for giving up on working from home because my wife kept interrupting my meetings?

In a cozy suburban home, the hum of a laptop signaled a new chapter for a medical professional thrilled to work from home. With visions of morning cuddles with his four-year-old daughter and shared suppers, he saw a brighter family life ahead. Yet, the dream quickly frayed. His wife’s relentless interruptions during confidential meetings turned his home office into a battleground, leaving him torn between family time and job security. Readers, brace for a tale of boundaries, misunderstandings, and a lock that couldn’t keep the chaos out.

What happens when a well-meaning plan unravels? This story dives into the heart of a couple’s clash over work-from-home rules, sparking debates about respect and responsibility. It’s a scenario many can relate to, as remote work blurs the lines between personal and professional life, testing patience and partnerships.

‘AITA for giving up on working from home because my wife kept interrupting my meetings?’

I work in the medical field. I often discuss confidential information with clients and doctors. I am not a doctor myself. In July of this year I finally had an opportunity to for employment that would give me the option of working from home. I sat down with my wife and explained that this was a good thing for us.

I would be home three more days every week. I would still be going into the office on Tuesday and Thursday. But the other days I could skip out on the commute. I could help with the my daughter in the morning and throughout the day. I could help with supper. I could see my 4 year old daughter more. Not all the time of course.

I was still going to be working. But our car would be home three extra days. My wife could take our car and drop off our daughter with our parents or a sitter if she needed. We say and talked to my daughter and explained that even though I was home I could not spend all my time with her.

I explained that if the door was closed she needed to knock quietly and ask permission to come in. And to accept it if the answer was no. My daughter understood. My wife did not. She was constantly coming into the office when I was in meetings. I had to excuse myself to get her out of the room. More than once I saw my daughter trying to keep her out of my room.

One time my wife was trying to carry my daughter into the room and my kid was holding onto the door jamb so she didn't get in trouble for coming in when the door was closed. I finally put a lock on the door. She said she didn't like being locked out of a room in her house. I explained that the door being closed and a sign saying that I was in a meeting didn't stop her.

She finally got the point. Until this thanksgiving. I was working on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving and she needed to go buy something for our meal the next day. And for some reason could not take our daughter with her. Or drop her off with either set of grandparents.

Or a drop in day care where we have a spot. She instead decided to shake my locked door and knock until I answered. I muted my meeting opened the door and told her to leave me alone until the end of the day. She left and texted that my daughter was watching tv in the other room..

I talked to my boss and I went back to work at my workplace starting last week. I hate being away from my daughter and my wife. My wife hates being limited to using Uber on the days I'm not home. Or depending on our parents. Now she is mad at me for going back to the office.

I told her that it's her fault for not understanding that I was WORKING from home. Not just playing games in my home office. I feel like an a**hole and she says I am. But I am the sole breadwinner for our family. If I got laid off because of her we would be in financial hardship..

ADVERTISEMENT

EDIT. Why are people messaging me about a spray bottle? She's not a cat.. Edit #2 Thanks for the information about the other post that fit removed. I am not going to do that. I am going to buy a second car.

Navigating work-from-home dynamics can feel like walking a tightrope. This man’s struggle highlights a common issue: maintaining professional boundaries in a shared living space. His wife’s interruptions, even during confidential medical meetings, suggest a disconnect in understanding the gravity of his role. A four-year-old grasping the rules better than an adult? That’s a red flag.

Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, notes, “Respecting each other’s boundaries is foundational to a healthy partnership” . Here, the wife’s actions—barging in, shaking locked doors—undermined her husband’s work, risking his job and their financial stability. Her behavior may stem from feeling sidelined or entitled to unrestricted access to their home, but it clashed with his need for a distraction-free workspace.

ADVERTISEMENT

This issue reflects broader challenges in remote work. A 2023 study by Owl Labs found that 42% of remote workers struggle with family interruptions . Clear communication and agreed-upon rules, like texting instead of knocking, could have preserved this arrangement. Instead, the husband’s return to the office was a practical move to protect his livelihood.

For solutions, experts suggest setting visual cues (e.g., a “do not disturb” sign) and scheduling family check-ins to balance needs. Showing the wife community feedback, as one Redditor proposed, might spark self-reflection. Ultimately, respect for boundaries strengthens both marriage and work-life harmony.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, dishing out a spicy mix of support and shade. It’s like a virtual potluck where everyone brought their boldest opinions:

ADVERTISEMENT

Glittering_Cherry909 − NTA -- working from home is work, not just being home during work hours

Vaelin_Wolf − NTA, you explained it so clearly that a 4 YO could understand it. When there is a very real chance of legal repercussions from a privacy breach due to your wife's negligent behavior, she left you no choice. You have to protect the income for your family so I don't see how working at home was still a viable option. And it really sucks because it deprives you and your daughter of extra time together.

FunkyOrangePenguin − NTA. You can’t efficiently work from your house because she doesn’t respect the boundaries you set. As a result, your whole family loses out since you’ll be going back to the office. That’s on her. Ask her if she would prefer that you stay at home and run the risk of getting fired since she is jeopardizing your work/income by acting like this.

ADVERTISEMENT

jammy913 − NTA. Sounds like you had to go back to working in person. You were left no other option. If your 4 year old could understand the rules, but your wife couldn't...holy moly, that's insane.. SMH.

MutantsAtTableNine − INFO - is there a gigantic chocolate fountain in your office?. If not then there is zero reason for constantly barging in there. NTA.

Regular-Tell-108 − NTA. My partner works from home in the medical field and I truly cannot imagine any circumstance in which I would knock or bother them during their workday. Your wife had a good thing going and could not make the very small sacrifices needed to keep that sustainable. I'm sorry it didn't work for you.

ADVERTISEMENT

noclevernickname2021 − NTA, but you never should have told her you could help with your daughter during the day. That set an unrealistic expectation. That said, she's completely wrong for her behavior.

Sadbabytrashpanda − NTA. You did what you had to do to keep your job. Your wife couldn't respect your work so you were forced back into the office. The only person she has to blame for losing all of the benefits of you WFH is herself due to her self-centeredness.

WholeAd2742 − NTA, and she is literally jeopardizing the stability and livelihood for herself and your daughter with her immature behavior. She needs to understand the boundaries for working from home, and if not, then you will be at the office.

ADVERTISEMENT

Mandaloriana_2022 − NTA. 👉🏼Op, would it help to show your wife this thread so she can see how she is TA to you and to herself for losing the ability to have the car and the benefit of having your there in the mornings (as well as saving on gas) plus putting your source of income in jeopardy?

Your wife is not respecting your boundary and respecting boundaries is marriage 101.. Suggestion: Another person in your shoes on this thread was also working from home and she had her husband txt her when needed just as they would through the day as if she was in the office. Would this help? Can she try the txting option, instead of the barging in option?

Could you try it for a week so you don’t have to miss out on daughter-daddy time? Further, can you get the family in on this to explain and back you up on how she is TA to herself and you? I don’t usually like sending flying monkeys… but your wife sure could use some. Although as I said above, maybe showing this thread will do the job.

ADVERTISEMENT

😁Saw your edit: the spray bottle is a Reddit joke. There was a post where someone trained a kid to not to touch something with a spray bottle because the kid didn’t understand with words. It was effective, but the kid’s mom didn’t appreciate it. I don’t think your wife would either. Hehe. Good luck Op!

These Redditors rallied behind the husband, applauding his patience and roasting his wife’s boundary-blunders. From legal risks to lost daddy-daughter time, they saw her actions as the real culprit. But do these fiery takes capture the full picture, or are they just adding fuel to the drama?

This tale of a work-from-home dream turned sour shows how quickly good intentions can spiral. The husband’s choice to return to the office wasn’t just about a locked door—it was about safeguarding his family’s future. Yet, the lingering tension with his wife hints at deeper issues to resolve. Buying a second car might ease logistics, but rebuilding mutual respect will take more. What would you do if your partner’s actions jeopardized your job? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

ADVERTISEMENT
Share this post

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *