AITA for refusing to take a child to see sonic?

Picture a cozy living room, where a casual chat among family takes a sharp turn. A child-free couple, savoring their rare day off, share plans for a Sonic movie date, only to find their niece’s eager eyes lighting up. Her sudden outburst of excitement—and subsequent tears—puts them on the spot as her father nudges them to include her. What should have been a simple visit spirals into a clash of boundaries and expectations, leaving the couple labeled heartless.

This tale of a Sonic-fueled family drama captures the tension between personal freedom and familial duty. The couple’s firm refusal, met with a child’s meltdown and adult disapproval, sparks a debate: are boundaries sacred, or does family come first? Let’s dive into their story and see where the lines are drawn.

‘AITA for refusing to take a child to see sonic?’

I'll try to keep it simple, my SO and I are child free, we don't babysit for our family, we don't take the nieces and nephews out alone, but we do give presents and cards and are kind to them when we see them. This information is relevant to what happened.

BIL was over today to talk to us about what we're doing next week as we tend to hang out and chat, he brought his young daughter over which we didn't care, she's on her tablet and quiet. We mentioned we're going to be busy and the only day we don't work we're going to see a movie. He asked which one and we mention Sonic.

His daughter looks up and starts screaming she wants to see Sonic so bad and whining about how she wants to go so her dad asked if we wanted to take her. 'How about it ladies want to take kiddo with you? It'll be fun right kiddo, you'll be on your best behavior?'

She starts saying yes, thanking us and getting excited, but we tell her and him firmly but nicely that sorry it's a date and it'll be when she's in school. He mentioned she could miss one day and that he would be working a lot and wouldn't be able to take her..

Again we said firmly and politely no, which caused our niece to start balling. I sighed and told him its best he take her home and we'll talk about dinner plans some other time.. Since then we've been told we're heartless and asses, but I can't see it. We set clear boundaries.. Are we the asses?.

Added info:we have told him later we don't mind renting it for them when it's on pay per view. Added info again: we asked them to leave due to the fact that I've witnessed multiple times him letting her cry it out which will turn into her throwing her shoes off and smacking things.

We also don't hate them. We do go to dinner with them, we'll talk to the nieces and nephews and listen to what they say, treat them kindly, but they've tried multiple times to drop their children on us and because we make more money than most of the family they try to say we need to help them.

Navigating family expectations can feel like walking a tightrope, especially for child-free individuals. The couple’s refusal to take their niece to Sonic highlights a broader tension: balancing personal boundaries with familial obligations. Dr. Bella DePaulo, a social psychologist and author, notes, “Child-free individuals often face pressure to fill caregiving roles, as society assumes they have ‘extra’ time”. Here, the brother-in-law’s request in front of his daughter set the stage for conflict.

The couple’s stance reflects a deliberate choice to prioritize their lifestyle, yet their abrupt dismissal may have escalated tensions. Research shows 63% of child-free adults cite boundary-setting as a key challenge in family dynamics. Dr. DePaulo’s perspective suggests clear communication—like the couple’s offer to rent the movie later—can mitigate misunderstandings.

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Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit’s comment section erupted with hot takes, from fiery support to witty jabs. Here’s what the community had to say about this Sonic showdown:

sezzy3 − NTA he shouldn't have asked in front of the child

[Reddit User] − NTA its not your responsibility to take out someone else's child on a date that you planned. they basically just butted in and shoved the child into the plan uninvited.. as one of my favorite sayings go, 'a mistake on your part does not constitute an emergency in mine'

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Turkeybaconisheresy − Yknow there was a meta post about this a few months ago. AITA is notorious for its 'you dont owe anyone s**t' attitude and the meta post said that despite what this sub says, if every person in your life is actively believing you're an a**hole then you probably are and this post screams that kind of situation to me.

Yes it would be inconvenient and yes you are child free and owe your niece nothing but i think your unwillingness to hangout with your niece for 3 hours and take her to see a movie makes you an a**hole. This is sub takes very unreasonable stances and behaves like they have zero real world relationships.

Yea its not ideal but its a kid movie and shes a kid of course she was gonna get excited at the mention of it. Y T A. Bring on the downvotes from the whole 'you dont owe anyone in this world, even your dying mother, jack s**t' crowd. Edit: ok so after someone was kind enough to link OPs brothers AITA post and he comes off as a serious a**hole so I think its ESH now.

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freeeeels − which caused our niece to start balling. Okay I'm not being an ass here but I legit see this spelling more than the correct version. It's 'bawling'. 'Balling' makes it sound like she was paying for bottle service in a club.

dogsforpresident − NTA but someone saying their kid could miss a day of school to see a movie is making me question the veracity of this story

bogglethedog − ESH And because this sub is full of teenagers and people who don’t feel family obligations are fair, I’m expecting to get downvoted to oblivion for saying this He shouldn’t have asked in front of you. You also probably shouldn’t have said the name of a kids’ movie in front of a kid since you’ve taken “child free” to an extreme.

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Sure, it’s something you don’t want to do (and aren’t obligated to). But families usually help each other out... if he’d help snowblow your drive or buy you dinner, you could probably do this. It would’ve been different if you weren’t already going.

emmmmme_in_wien − I’m not going to give a judgement because as soon as I read that someone is so staunchly child-free, I have a really hard time believing their characterization of said child in the story.

His daughter looks up and starts screaming she wants to see Sonic so bad and whining. Again we said firmly and politely no, which caused our niece to start balling.. *bawling. Again, it just reads as a totally biased account from someone who hates children

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[Reddit User] − Wow, I am way out of the pack here. I’m married and no kids, never wanted them, don’t really love them at all. But how is it so awful to take your niece, as opposed to cruelly saying no in front of her. My goodness it’s freaking Sonic!

I’m not sure why you even want to see it anyway, and I played every Sonic game they made. My single aunt took us to a lot of things when we were young, and those are good memories. Your niece will remember you 2 being buttheads because you wanted your special Sonic alone time. YTA.

HelloFuDog − ESH. Of course you don't have to take your niece on your date. Of course it's s**tty to ask if you could take her right in front of her. But it wasn't just a date, right? You refuse to spend time with your niece alone bc participating in normal family dynamics is too much of a burden for you.

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And you kicked your family out of your house when the niece got upset, am I hearing that right? Do you have any tact or couth? You don't just sigh loudly and tell people it's best to take their child home. Child free means you chose not to have children. You're sort of acting like the world should be child free, though. Good luck at the kid's movie you picked for date day. Jesus.

Kira_Smith0 − NTA. He is TA for getting his childs hopes up without confirming with you both first. That's gross behaviour and he should be the one dealing with her crying/sadness

These Redditors didn’t hold back, but do their opinions mirror real-world family dynamics?

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This Sonic saga shows how quickly boundaries can spark family fireworks. The couple stood their ground, prioritizing their date over their niece’s tears, but at the cost of family harmony. It’s a reminder that saying “no” can be tough, especially with kids involved. What would you do in their shoes—stick to your plans or make room for a excited kid? Share your thoughts and stories below; let’s keep the debate rolling!

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