Update: AITA for threatening my wife with divorce after she quit her job to be a “tradwife”?

For those who want to read the previous part: AITA for threatening my wife with divorce after she quit her job to be a “tradwife”?

After years of stable family dynamics, a sudden shift in roles can shake the very foundation of a marriage. I’m a 34-year-old man, and my wife—33—has recently quit her job to embrace a “tradwife” lifestyle, despite our well-balanced work schedules and our kids being in school.

I earn significantly more and have managed our household finances and work-life balance just fine while we both work part-time. However, over the past two months, my wife’s increasing insistence on being a full-time housewife—bolstered by social media trends and promises of perks like a perpetually ready dinner and other intimate rewards—has put us at odds.

Our discussions have escalated into heated arguments, culminating in my threatening divorce when I felt utterly unsupported and disrespected. Now, I’m left wondering: should I swallow my pride and accept her new role, or follow through on divorce, especially when I have serious health concerns that require me to spend quality time with our kids?

‘Update: AITA for threatening my wife with divorce after she quit her job to be a “tradwife”?’

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

Dr. Laura Brown, a clinical psychologist specializing in family dynamics and financial stress, explains that a healthy marriage relies on both partners actively sharing the burdens during difficult times. “When one partner makes a major decision without mutual consent—especially one that affects the family’s financial stability—it can lead to feelings of betrayal and emotional isolation. Boundaries must be set to protect both partners’ well-being.”

Dr. Brown emphasizes that while some may find the idea of a “tradwife” lifestyle appealing in theory, it must be a joint decision that aligns with the family’s overall needs and long-term plans. In our case, my wife’s unilateral decision to quit her job has forced me into an unfair position, especially considering my genetic heart condition that limits my ability to handle extra stress.”

In situations where a partner’s actions disrupt the delicate balance of shared responsibilities, it’s understandable that one might feel compelled to threaten drastic measures, such as divorce, as a way to reassert control and demand fairness,” she adds. Furthermore, Dr. Brown advises that such conflicts should ideally be resolved through open, honest dialogue, but if repeated patterns of unilateral decision-making persist, it can irreparably erode trust—leading to a situation where divorce may indeed be the only viable solution.

See what others had to share with OP:

Reddit responses are divided, though many lean towards supporting my stance. Several commenters argue that marriage means sharing both the joys and burdens, and if my wife is unwilling to contribute financially during a crisis, it’s a significant breach of our partnership.

Many stress that my threat of divorce is a wake-up call that I cannot continue bearing the full burden alone, especially when my health is at risk. While some advise reconciliation and counseling, others firmly believe that if she insists on a traditional role without considering our current realities, then our future together is in jeopardy.

Ultimately, a successful marriage requires mutual respect and shared decision-making, especially during challenging times. My wife’s decision to quit her job unilaterally has not only upset our financial balance but has also deeply undermined my trust, particularly given my health concerns. While part of me still loves her and hopes for reconciliation, I cannot ignore the strain this has put on our family.

Would you compromise your financial and emotional well-being for a partner’s unilateral decision, or is it fair to threaten divorce to reclaim balance? How would you navigate this delicate situation? Please share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.