AITA for wearing my GF’s hoodie?

A chilly evening at a family gathering took an unexpected turn when a simple hoodie swap ignited a firestorm of drama. Picture a cozy living room, filled with the hum of relatives catching up, only for one man’s choice to borrow his girlfriend’s baggy sweater to unravel deep-seated tensions. His sister-in-law’s sharp disapproval, laced with biphobic undertones, turned a casual visit into a battleground over gender norms and personal freedom, leaving everyone on edge.

This Reddit tale, brimming with petty revenge and bold self-expression, captures a relatable clash of modern values against outdated biases. The man’s decision to double down with a bright pink hoodie at the next meet-up only fanned the flames, sparking a debate about acceptance and defiance that’s sure to hook any reader.

‘AITA for wearing my GF’s hoodie?’

My gf and I went to my parents house last week for a visit. My brother, his wife and their son were also visiting. SIL and I have never gotten along. She kept my brother from coming to my 18th birthday party because I told her she couldn't bring her baby with her (it was a place full of drunk people and loud music, not ideal for a baby).

She also has issues with my sexuality (bi guy here) and my relationship with my gf. Though she doesn't like it when I point out how stupid her logic is. Anyway, things were going good until I got a bit chilly. I'd forgotten to bring a jacket/hoodie with me as it'd been warm when we'd left.

Thankfully, my gf is almost always too warm and only wears hoodies cause she looks great in them (her words not mine though she does look great in them). She offered me the hoodie, I put it on and then all hell broke loose. SIL started lecturing me about how a 'real man' would never wear his girlfriend's clothes and, since I'm 'normal' (straight) now, then I should try and act more like a man.

I don't see her issue with it. My gf is taller than I am so her (already baggy hoodies) look slightly baggier on me cause of how short I am. My gf says she thinks it's cute and I think her hoodies are comfortable. Plus it's not like it's all the time. Anyway, SIL had her rant about how it's gross and makes me less of a man and how it makes her uncomfortable.

She made a few comments about how my nephew could be 'influenced' by my behaviour. Anyway, things were tense for a while after that and we left a bit earlier than we'd originally planned to. So fast forward to yesterday, again we were all at my parent's house and I'd decided (with my gf's approval) to wear her bright pink school hoodie.

I didn't go to the same school as my gf and SIL knows that. She recognised the hoodie and went quiet, shooting us dirty looks whenever she could and making snarky comments every now and then. I later got a text from my brother that I made SIL really uncomfortable

and that I'm an AH for wearing something I knew would upset her. I know it was petty but I'm a petty b**ch and I kinda feel like she started it. Anyway, most of my family are on my side but there are a few who think I'm an AH for being petty and that I should've just let it go.. So reddit, AITA?

Edit  Thank you so much for the comments and advice! I have made an effort to read and upvote every comment, even if I have't managed to respond. The kind words really mean a lot :). Also, to those of you who mentioned wearing a skirt or something to the next gathering, my gf actually loved this idea,

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and picked out a pair of her boots (smaller heel so I don't break my neck) and a gorgeous pink sweater for me to wear (I'm not confident enough for skirts... yet). She also suggested makeup. Long story short, if we do go through with it, I may update.

Family gatherings can expose raw nerves, especially when personal choices challenge rigid beliefs. This hoodie saga reflects a clash over gender expression, with the OP caught in a tug-of-war between authenticity and conformity. The sister-in-law’s reaction, steeped in biphobia, highlights her discomfort with fluid identities, while OP’s petty pink hoodie stunt is a cheeky pushback against her control.

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This tension mirrors broader societal debates about gender norms. A 2021 Pew Research study notes 59% of Americans believe society should accept non-traditional gender expressions (pewresearch.org). Yet, resistance persists, often rooted in fear of change. Dr. Laura McGuire, a diversity expert, observes, “Clothing choices are a powerful form of identity. When others police them, they’re asserting dominance over personal autonomy” (bustle.com).

OP’s defiance, while petty, reclaims that autonomy. To navigate such conflicts, experts suggest setting boundaries—like calmly asserting personal choices while disengaging from toxic criticism. For OP, this might mean limiting SIL’s platform at family events or leaning into supportive allies, like his girlfriend, to diffuse tension.

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Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit didn’t hold back on this one, serving up a buffet of hot takes with a side of snark. Here are the top comments:

AnchorsAviators − NTA. She sounds h**ophobic and should probably shut her mouth.

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sadsarcasticjew − NTA, honestly wearing the pink hoodie is lowkey badass. But they’re...sweatshirts? Would she be offended if ur gf wore one of your sweatshirts? Probably not. And her biphobia is shining real bright. Not gonna pressure you, but if you think you could pull off a skirt and heels with the pink hoodie.....

prurientSeraph − NTA. SIL needs to get over her issues with other peoples' sexuality. She's the AH and honestly I would insist you wear 'feminine' clothes indefinitely until she does.

JudgeJed100 − NTA - I thought this was gonna be some role reversed post about you stealing your girlfriends hoodie to wear without her permission but I was pleasantly surprised. Yeah nah, your free to wear her hoodie if you want and she is okay with it. Your SIL clearly has one issues, and is showing h**ophobic views

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daiceedoll − NTA I'm an entomologist and sometimes my work takes me to farms. There's a burly farmworker at one orchard who has a blue sweatshirt that says 'PINK' on it (Victoria's Secret). He might not know the brand. But who cares either way??

It's functional. A sweatshirt is a sweatshirt. They all work the same when you are cold. People need to get over themselves. It's 2020. If you have the time and energy to get your panties in a bunch about a SWEATSHIRT, I'd say you are having an AWESOME year.

Teacherofnothing − NTA at all. She's just showing her closed mindedness towards your lifestyle which is not cool. Also, your brother really should be standing up for you rather than leaving it to the point where the situation gets so uncomfortable.

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TwistedHoney6810 − NTA and love a good bit of petty revenge! Very well done! Also, my husband is a man's man and he has been known to wear my sweater... Like knee length, button up, full out women's sweater. Do you and ignore her saltiness.

HelenDamnnation − NTA. SIL is a raging bigot and needs to grow up.

DramaCat95 − NTA. Sure, you were petty that second time around but your clothes are still your decision and your SIL sounds like a bigoted cow.

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Clarity4me − NTA Why should you live **your** life according to **her** stupidity?

From applauding OP’s petty flair to calling SIL a “bigoted moron,” the community’s vibe is clear. But do these online roasts reflect real-world solutions, or are they just digital popcorn?

This hoodie hullabaloo is a reminder that family ties can fray when acceptance is conditional. OP’s pink-hued rebellion, backed by his girlfriend’s grin, flips the script on outdated norms with style. But it also begs the question: where’s the line between standing your ground and stirring the pot? What would you do if your wardrobe sparked a family feud? Share your thoughts below!

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