AITA for making my SIL drive five hours home to drop off her so-called service dog?

Shirley Stafford Hours
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Picture this: a sprawling house buzzing with holiday cheer, the scent of barbecue wafting through the air, and fireworks ready to light up the night sky. A family of 20 is set to gather, dodging the usual traffic chaos by arriving early—pure genius, right? But then, like a plot twist in a comedy flick, the sister-in-law (SIL) rolls up, SUV door swinging open, and out bounds her so-called “service dog,” tail wagging and ready to wreak havoc.

Our host, already dreading the drool and chaos, had laid down the law: no dogs, period. Yet here we are, tension thicker than the burger patties on the grill. The homeowner’s frustration simmers—imagine hosting a big bash only to face an uninvited, four-legged gatecrasher. Will this holiday weekend sizzle with fun or fizzle into family drama? Let’s dive into this juicy tale and find out!

‘AITA for making my SIL drive five hours home to drop off her so-called service dog?’

With the upcoming holiday weekend, my wife’s family decided to take a new approach after being stuck in traffic every year. Seeing as my wife and I live in the largest house with the most bedrooms, they would visit us again, but they’d take a couple of extra days off to come early and beat the traffic.

Over then next couple of days, we’re going to have about 20 people arriving at various times to enjoy the barbecue, fireworks, and alcohol. Now, my SIL is a huge dog lover. She takes her dog *everywhere*. She got a fake Service Dog jacket for the dog so she could take it into restaurants, shopping malls, and other places that don’t allow dogs.

On the other hand, I detest dogs. I don’t want them near me, and even less in my house. Before my SIL came, I was extremely clear: no dog. Get a dog sitter. Put a bowl of food and water on the floor and play Homeward Bound on repeat. I don’t care what you do, but **do not bring your dog to my house.

I especially hate her big dumb dog because it’s poorly trained, needs around-the-clock attention, and refuses to leave me alone. It’s the obnoxious type of dog that will jump onto the table to literally steal the food from your hand. A couple of hours ago at about 7pm, SIL rolled up, opened the passenger side door to her SUV (which she bought solely to give more space to her dog),

and out ran old Lassie, ready to run and p**s and s**t all over the place. She actually had the audacity to play it off as ignorance despite my multiple text messages to her saying not to bring her dog. When I told her she couldn’t bring her dog inside, she apologetically smiled and said “Sorry, sitter canceled!”. There was no sitter.

I just said no. The dog can stay in the car. My SIL then tried to play off the service dog sob story about how she needs an emotional support animal, to which I responded she should actually get a *real* service dog. Then she started debating about how the dog would have a panic attack in the car.

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Yeah, nothing quite screams service animal like “will flip out if left alone for two minutes.” My wife, who has spent the last 23 years of her life enabling her sister, agreed that they could stay just one night. Everyone else was agreeing and my SIL brightened up at this idea,

but I know her personality enough to know she’s going to turn one night into “I’ll do it after breakfast,” and that into “oops, had a glass of wine, can’t drive now!” I put my foot down and said no. My SIL left for a night drive back home so she could figure out the dog situation,

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and everyone is mad at me. They called me a monster for making a young woman drive home five hours in the middle of the night, and I said she wasn’t alone because she had her service dog. That made them even angrier. Now I’m alone in my den, people are furious at me, and I wonder if I’m just being an a**hole.

This family clash is a classic case of boundaries being tested—think of it as a tug-of-war between a host’s rules and a guest’s defiance. The homeowner set a clear no-dog policy, likely fueled by past chaos from this poorly trained pup. Meanwhile, the SIL’s “service dog” claim, lacking legitimacy, muddies the waters, leaving family members picking sides in a holiday standoff.

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This saga taps into a broader issue: the misuse of service dog labels. According to the American Kennel Club, true service dogs undergo rigorous training to aid specific disabilities, unlike emotional support animals, which require no formal certification. The SIL’s casual “sitter canceled” excuse hints at entitlement, gambling on forgiveness rather than respect. Dr. Stanley Coren, a renowned psychologist and dog behavior expert, notes in a 2019 Psychology Today article, “Misrepresenting pets as service animals erodes public trust and endangers those who genuinely rely on them” (psychologytoday.com).

Let’s unpack this: the homeowner’s stance protects his space, a reasonable boundary, while the SIL’s move reeks of disregard—though her late-night drive does tug at the heartstrings. For solutions, communication is key. The SIL could’ve arranged a real sitter or a pet-friendly hotel, as many chains like Marriott welcome dogs. The host might consider a calm follow-up chat to mend fences, perhaps suggesting future pet-free visits. Respecting boundaries, after all, keeps the holiday spirit alive!

See what others had to share with OP:

Here are some hot takes from the Reddit community—candid and humorous, as always! They weigh in on this doggone drama, and the verdict leans heavily one way. Check out the top reactions:

iaincaradoc − NTA.. I despise people who lie about their untrained pet being an ESA or an actual service animal.. It just makes life all that more difficult for people who have real service animals. Edit: This has blown up just a bit.

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To be clear, when I said 'untrained pet,' I meant 'not even trained to the level of being a reasonable *pet*, let alone a service animal.' As in, 'trained not to jump up on people, excrete waste in living spaces, or steal food from someone's plate while they're eating.'

idontknowyourlife_ − NTA but the line about her not being alone she has her 'service dog' 🤣🤣🤣

Kris82868 − NTA I do think the way you put it made you come across maybe sounding like an a**hole, but apparently SIL didn't understand you clearly saying no to the dog the first time.

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[Reddit User] − lmao you are NTA. I love dogs but a badly behaved dog intruding on your vacation is the worst. You didn't sign up for it, you told your SIL no, and now she's dealing with the consequences.

llama-mama-drama − NTA. Your sister is the worst type of pet owner. She is why there needs to be a national registry for real service dogs. She is why real service dogs get attacked by these poorly trained fake ass emotional service dogs (and before anyone comes at me, I have no issue with emotional service dogs AS LONG AS THEY ARE PROPERLY TRAINED).

She knew the dog was unwelcomed but was counting on bullying you into letting it stay if she just showed up with it. Good for you for standing your ground. Everyone in this situation is an AH except for you.

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highwoodshady − NTA I love, love love my dog but I wouldn't dream of bringing her to someone else's house for a long weekend even if she was invited. If I couldn't find a sitter, she gets too anxious at the kennel because I tried boarding her, I'd stay home.

Sadly people like your sister make a mockery out of service dogs and cause undue scrutiny for people who have trained dogs because they need them to function. Your sister drives lots of places all times of the day.. if she didn't want to drive back, she could have booked a hotel room at a dog friendly hotel and left in the morning. She tried to force your hand, it didn't work out.

llama-mama-drama − Info: did your wife originally agree to not having the dog stay as well? I know you told SIL no multiple times - was wife also aware of and in agreement with you?

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diskebbin − NTA. Who does this as a guest in someone else’s home? She did it to herself. All the furious people can leave too.

leroyjz − NTA. I don’t understand how your wife and family can’t grasp that you told her NO. I have a dog. I love my dog. I will never take my dog somewhere it is not wanted. I will always ask first.

Cloud_King_15 − NTA. Sometimes people just need to learn a hard lesson. Unfortunately, I do think the cost of your decision was far too high. She played the kind of hand where the only way she would lose was if you both lost. But I salute you for this on multiple levels.

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When her family gets upset, just say this 'Look I'm sorry, but she could have texted, she could have called, but she showed up with the dog knowing full well I didn't want it in my house thinking she could get away with it, and you all were about to let her.

I'm sorry she had to drive back, but that was a decision she made, not me.' Also, this is why people hate service animals, because too many people put the vest on a regular animal and try to play it off. It honestly ruins it for people that really need it.

These are popular opinions on Reddit, but do they really reflect reality? Some cheer the host’s backbone, while others chuckle at the “service dog” saga—yet family tension lingers like smoke from the grill.

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This holiday tale serves up a hearty mix of boundary battles, fake service dog drama, and a five-hour drive that left everyone barking mad. The homeowner held his ground, but at the cost of family harmony—perhaps a lesson in balancing firmness with a dash of compromise. The Reddit crew mostly backed him, yet the fallout stings. What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Would you ban the pup or roll with the chaos? Share your thoughts, experiences, and holiday hosting tips below—let’s get this discussion sizzling!

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