AITA for leaving when my mom told me to move my car so her neighbor’s daughter can park in her driveway?

The hum of a car engine fades as a family visit takes a sharp turn. This Redditor, arriving at his mom’s house after an eight-hour drive with his sons, expected a warm welcome. Instead, he was asked to move his car from her driveway for Lily, the neighbor’s daughter his mom treats like kin. The sting of favoritism—$300 checks for his sons versus an eight-week European trip for Lily—sent him packing, bags in hand.

This isn’t just about a parking spot; it’s a deep-cut wound of feeling second-best. The mom’s devotion to Lily, fluent in her Italian heritage, contrasts with the OP’s sense of being sidelined. Her calls to return ring hollow against years of perceived slights. Readers are hooked, wondering: was storming out a tantrum or a stand against unfair treatment? Reddit’s got a lot to unpack here.

‘AITA for leaving when my mom told me to move my car so her neighbor’s daughter can park in her driveway?’

my mom has always wanted a daughter. Instead she ended up with 2 sons and 6 grandsons. 16 years ago, a young woman with a 2 year old daughter (let’s call the daughter Lily) moved across the street from her.

She was a single mom and didn’t have any family in the area so my mom offered to help take care of the little girl while her mom worked/studied. Over the years, she’s become an adoptive mom/grandmother to this woman and her daughter. She was there when the woman married her husband and had 2 more girls together.

She’s very close to the whole family but especially Lily. My mom was born and raised in Italy. My dad was French. My brother and I don’t speak any French or Italian. Lily is not only fluent in French and Italian but she knows more about the culture than me or my brother and she knows all of my mom’s recipes.

My mom also helped pay for her private school tuition because she doesn’t like the public schools in the area. Lily, my son, and my nephew graduated from high school in may. My son and my nephew each got a card and a check for $300. My mom took Lily to Europe for 8 weeks over the summer. I got to my moms house with my sons last night.

We planned on staying for a few days because we live 8 hours away. I was parked in the driveway, then right before dinner my mom told me I needed to move my car so Lily could park in her driveway. I said Lily could park on the street but my mom said no, the driveway is Lily’s spot and I have to move so I told my sons to get our bags and we went home.

My mom has been calling me since last night asking me to come back and saying I overreacted to being asked to move my car. I refused and my sons and I are celebrating without her but I’m starting to wonder if I was the a**hole for leaving when my mom told me to move my car.

ADVERTISEMENT

This parking spat is a proxy for deeper family wounds. The OP’s exit wasn’t just about moving his car—it was a reaction to feeling like an outsider in his mom’s affection, overshadowed by Lily. The mom’s preference for Lily, evident in lavish gestures like funding her tuition and a European trip, stings against the modest gifts for her grandsons. “Favoritism in families can erode trust,” says Dr. Susan Forward, a family dynamics expert quoted in Psychology Today. Her work highlights how unequal treatment fuels resentment.

The mom’s bond with Lily, built on shared culture and proximity, isn’t inherently wrong but lacks balance. A study from the Journal of Family Psychology shows 70% of adult children report feeling hurt by parental favoritism, often tied to perceived emotional neglect. The OP’s mom may see Lily as filling a daughter-shaped void, but dismissing her son’s feelings—especially asking him to yield the driveway—ignites old wounds.

ADVERTISEMENT

This story taps a universal issue: navigating chosen family versus biological ties. Dr. Forward suggests open dialogue to address favoritism, advising the OP to express his hurt calmly, perhaps saying, “I feel overlooked when Lily’s needs come first.” A family meeting, as recommended by Verywell Family, could clarify boundaries and expectations. The mom might not realize her actions read as rejection, especially given the OP’s rare visits.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Reddit rolled up like a family reunion with opinions spicier than Nonna’s marinara. The crowd dished out support and shade, unpacking the driveway drama with gusto. Here’s the raw take from the community:

ADVERTISEMENT

RiversSongInTime − NTA- as we sat around here, this isn’t about the Iranian yogurt. This is a reaction to years of feeling second class to Lily because, as sons, you somehow did not fulfill some weird desire of your mom’s preferred genitalia.

I’m sorry you’ve all felt this way for so long, it’s hard to watch your mom seemingly show someone else more affection than they do to you.. Have you ever actually laid it all out for her like you have here for us?

painted_unicorn − NTA the whole '$300 vs 8 weeks in Europe' really sealed it for me. What blatant favoritism, this isn't about a parking spot, it's years of built up issues.. EDIT: so many of the Y T As here are making so many assumptions they're just making up their own stories.

Nothing in this post makes it sound like the mom is sad or feels abandoned after her sons moved out, nothing says that OP or bro make enough money to send their kids to private school so mom is doing neighbor girl a favor to equal it out, also the reach to justify her taking this girl on a 8 week \*expensive as hell\* vacation

ADVERTISEMENT

and only giving her grandkids $300. If mom wants to treat neighbor girl extra special then fine, that's on her, it doesn't mean OP can't reach his limit and take one slight too many and leave when he feels he and his family are unwanted.

CakeEatingRabbit − NTA. It is ridicoulus unnessary to make you feel like second class. Just a werid power move to ask you to move your car.

moremommapoorpoppa − NTA - Lily could easily park in the street, and you were there first. Weird, rude power move. It’s not “Lily’s spot”, it’s just your moms driveway. First come, first dibs.

ADVERTISEMENT

parislondonboston − NTA. The whole situation was about much more than moving the car. I'm so sorry your mom takes you for granted. I really hope you and your boys have a great holiday.

Rohini_rambles − INFO:. How often does your mom see your son and nephew? She's with Lily's family everyday.. Who helps her with daily stuff?. It sounds like she favours Lily for sure, but is it because she's the person who's there for her?

No judgment, atm, you need to express your feelings towards your mom. Maybe she and Lily have many deep heart to hearts! See what it is she's missing from her relationship with you guys. It may have nothing to do with the genders.

ADVERTISEMENT

Sea-Butterscotch383 − NTA. Was it extreme and not even about the spot? Absolutely. However, it sounds like you’re mom has favored some random human over you so I’d probably harbor resentment as well. OP is just as valid as every other person that comes here and gets backed for being put second to a golden cold. If not more so! This isn’t even her kid!!!

Ok_Teach_6509 − NTA - The fact that you know your mom always wanted a daughter and is upset to have received only sons tells a lot. The rest just builds it up.

az22hctac − Maybe controversial here and say YTA. You aren’t there every day, this might be a long term arrangement between them. Lily help her with things and she lets her use her drive. Reasonable to assume you can park in the drive but when your mom said you would need to move and why you got jealous.

ADVERTISEMENT

Your mother is close to Lily and there is nothing wrong with that. It doesn’t sound like it was to your detriment. She may prefer her company (they have more in common) and Lily may be more grateful to her. May not be a popular opinion and maybe I’ve got the wrong impression (did you show an interest in learning your mother’s language or her recipes and she didn’t want to share them?)

YMMV-But − YTA. You live 8 hours away. How often do you visit? How much time have you & your kids spent with your mom vs the time Lily has spent with her? Did you ask your mom to teach you or your kids Italian or tell you about her recipes?

It sounds like Lily took an interest in your mom that you didn’t. If your kid graduated from high school, I bet you’re at least 40 & your mom is in her 60’s or 70’s. You should be glad your mom is close with her neighbors.

ADVERTISEMENT

They probably keep an eye on her & will be the first people to notice if she needs help or gets sick or has an accident. Instead you’re all b**t hurt because she lets the kid park her car in her driveway. If you’re jealous, act like an adult & talk to your mother, not just run away & sulk.

These Redditors backed the OP, slamming the mom’s favoritism as blatant, with Lily’s European trip versus $300 checks as exhibit A. Some saw her request as a power move, others urged a candid talk. Do these hot takes nail the issue, or are they just revving the engine?

This driveway dispute is a roadmap to deeper family hurts. The OP’s exit wasn’t about a parking spot—it was about years of feeling less-than next to Lily. His mom’s love for her “adoptive” granddaughter is sweet, but not at the cost of her sons’ dignity. It’s a reminder that family means balancing all bonds, not picking favorites. How would you handle a parent prioritizing someone else? Share your thoughts and stories below!

ADVERTISEMENT
Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *