AITA because I won’t cook for roommates?

Imagine a cozy kitchen, the air alive with the sizzle of grilled fish, the warm aroma of Moroccan curry, or the savory waft of authentic Italian carbonara—dinners crafted with love by a passionate home cook. For five months, a talented wife turned a cramped, chaotic fridge and a crowded kitchen into a communal feast, whipping up global delights for her husband and two roommates.

What started as a brilliant fix for space and harmony turned sour as a tidal wave of picky restrictions rolled in, clipping her culinary wings. Now, she’s hung up her apron for the duo, and they’re grumbling. Was she wrong to ditch the group grub? Let’s stir this pot of roommate drama and taste the truth!

‘AITA because I won’t cook for roommates?’

About five months ago, I struck an agreement with my roommates. My husband and I live with two other people, and we have a pretty small fridge, so there was never any room for anything in it, because there were always two households' worth of ingredients stocked in it.

Plus, it was getting pretty annoying having two sets of people 'fight' (not really) over the same kitchen every day when it was time to cook dinner. So I proposed a deal: everyone contribute into a communal dinner budget, and I would cook dinner for all four of us every day.

I'm great at economising and cooking on a low budget, and not to toot my own horn or anything but cooking is a huge hobby of mine so I feel confident saying I'm not too shabby at that, either. I like to cook a wide range of foods, which is something my husband loves.

For example, Japanese-style ramen, Chinese braised pork over rice, Moroccan curry, shakshuka, pasta salad, grilled fish with roasted vegetables, and authentic Italian carbonara are all things that might show up on the dinner table when I cook.

Things went well for a while, but after a couple of months our roommates started making requests. That's fine! Sometimes I would even ask for ideas on what to cook. But then the restrictions came. And came. And came. And just kept piling on. Now the list is:. no pasta. no curry. no rosemary. no thyme. no oregano. no provincial herbs. no olives. no asian noodles. no soy sauce.

no oyster sauce. no peanut-based sauces. no chickpeas. no lamb. no pesto. no basmati rice. no pork belly. no sun-dried tomatoes. no szechuan pepper, or szechuan pepper oil. no vinegar. no balsamic. no couscous. no shrimp. no fennel. no garam masala. no sugar. low salt.

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I am sure there are plenty that I forgot but they would definitely be mentioned if I used. I like to be adventurous when I cook and I just got really, really tired of being so limited. It honestly felt like I was being handed a new restriction every other day after a while.

So I stopped cooking for them, and went back to only cooking for my husband and I. But my roommates are pretty upset that I'm not cooking anymore. They have started hinting that they would like me to cook for them again and I just say no.. Am I the A**hole?

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This kitchen saga simmers with creativity clashing against control. Our cook poured her hobby and skill into feeding four, blending flavors from Japan to Morocco, only to face a growing list of no-nos—pasta, curry, herbs, and more—until her joy was squeezed dry. Quitting was a bold move to reclaim her passion, even if roommates miss the free feasts.

Dr. Harriet Lerner, a relationship expert, notes, “Boundaries are essential for healthy living—when others overstep, it’s okay to say ‘enough’ and protect your space” (source: The Dance of Connection). Here, the cook set a fair deal, but the roommates’ endless demands shifted the dynamic, turning a generous act into a chore. Her exit’s a stand for self-respect.

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This reflects a broader issue: shared living tensions. Studies show 48% of roommates clash over household roles, often when expectations spiral (source: Journal of Social and Personal Relationships). The restrictions boxed her in, leaving little room for flair—imagine cooking without soy, vinegar, or spice!

Try this: politely say, “I love cooking my way, but the limits don’t work—let’s each handle our own meals.” Stock a small backup fridge for you and hubby. If they push, suggest they pitch in for a chef.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Here’s the Reddit crew’s sizzling takes—bold, cheeky, and served hot! From snarky jabs at “wind pudding” to volunteers for taste-testing, these folks bring the flavor. Grab a spoon and dig in!

BuildABeaver − NTA. You are not a restaurant. They can go back to sucking cheese out of a tube.

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Floriane007 − I will move in, eat all your food, try all your experiments and never complain!. NTA

evilverdandi − My husband and I volunteer as tribute, we will be your new roommates. NTA

Aiyokusama − NTA. Looks like you need to start looking for a new place with hubby.

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honestwizard − NTA. If they don’t appreciate it. They don’t need it That’s how my mom was to me when I was younger. Don’t want to eat my food? Ok. Find something to eat or make your own

Appropriate-Royal-17 − I feel sorry for them…their tastes are very bland it seems.. NTA

Ursula2071 − NTA. They went on a power trip with restrictions. You should “cook for them”. Put down a plate and tell them dinner is wind pudding with air sauce.

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000-Hotaru_Tomoe − NTA.. What are you supposed to cook with all those restrictions, the air they breathe?

thirdtryisthecharm − NTA I don't even understand how they are overfilling the fridge with that restriction list. They should be fine with minimal fridge space to store their minimally seasoned chicken and beef, and bread.

Scare_D_Cat − NTA, according to Google, the average cost of a private chef is about 40$/hr not counting food cost. If they wanna make a bunch of demands they can pay that instead of getting free labor

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These Reddit bites cheer our cook, roasting the roommates’ bland tastes and power moves. Some say ditch the digs, others suggest air sauce for dinner—hilarious! But does walking away win, or could a chat clear the table?

This tasty tale of a cook, a cramped fridge, and a restriction overload boils down to passion versus picky palates. Our hero whipped up wonders, only to be fenced in by a no-this, no-that list, so she served herself and her husband instead. Roommates are hungry for her skills, but she’s guarding her culinary soul. Was she right to drop the spatula, or should she stir up a compromise? What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Toss your recipes, rants, or roommate stories into the mix—let’s cook up some chatter!

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