AITA for telling someone not to touch my baby?

Picture a young mom, juggling errands with her infant daughter, pausing at a restaurant for takeout. A stranger coos over her baby, shares a personal struggle, then reaches to hold her. The baby shrinks back, and mom politely declines. But when another woman from the group tickles the child despite the clear no, the mom snaps, declaring her daughter’s body is her own and adults must respect that. Her own mother calls her harsh, insisting the strangers meant no harm, leaving her second-guessing her stand.

This Reddit saga is a fierce clash of instinct, autonomy, and social norms. Was her rebuke too sharp, or a vital shield for her child? It’s a story that pulses with protection, boundaries, and the weight of a mother’s gut.

‘AITA for telling someone not to touch my baby?’

This Reddit post unveils a mother’s fight to guard her daughter’s space. Here’s her story, raw and unfiltered:

Note: This argument happened pre-COVID, but it's been eating at me for a while. I was running errands with my mom and my infant daughter and we stopped at a restaurant to grab some take-out. The group ahead of us (a woman with her parents) saw my daughter and commented on how pretty she was.

While I was holding my daughter, the woman approached me to ask about her and tell me she was struggling to have a baby herself due to PCOS. I mentioned that I also had PCOS and recommended my fertility clinic. Then she asked to hold my daughter and reached out to her. My daughter shrank away and I was getting my own weird vibes, so I told her it wasn't a good idea.

When my turn came up to order, I handed my daughter to my mom. As I ordered, my daughter got squirmy, so my mom let her down on the floor. Shortly after, the woman's mom walked over to my daughter and tickled her. My daughter ran back to me and hid behind me.

I was pissed that someone would touch my daughter after I had already told them no. My mom started to apologize for my daughter, but I interrupted and said that my daughter's body is her own. And if she didn't want someone touching her, then I hoped grown-ups would respect that.

The other group finally got the hint and left my daughter alone after that. My mom scolded me, saying I was being too harsh about them touching my kid. She said they didn't mean any harm. I told her that they probably didn't, but I wasn't taking any chances.. So... AITA?.

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This encounter is a stark lesson in bodily autonomy and parental vigilance. The mother’s refusal to let a stranger hold her daughter, backed by her child’s discomfort and her own instincts, was entirely justified. The second woman’s tickling, after a clear boundary was set, violated consent, a serious breach regardless of intent. The grandmother’s dismissal risks normalizing unwanted touch, while the mother’s firm stance models respect for her daughter’s agency, crucial even at a young age.

Child psychologist Dr. Tovah Klein notes, “Teaching kids bodily autonomy early builds lifelong confidence” (Source). A 2023 study in Journal of Child and Family Studies found that 70% of parents face pressure to allow unwanted contact with their kids in social settings (Source). The strangers’ actions, though possibly well-meaning, ignored clear cues, and the mother’s response was a necessary correction.

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She should discuss boundaries with her mom to align on protecting the child, perhaps sharing resources on consent. “Education bridges gaps,” Klein advises. The strangers needed the blunt lesson, but she could practice calmer scripts for future encounters. Public spaces might benefit from signage on respecting personal space.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Reddit weighed in with takes as bold as a mother’s glare. Here’s what the crowd had to say:

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syphone − NTA. Why do people feel so entitled to touch/hold a STANGERS baby/toddler?? They don't know you and you don't know them. Yes, they are extremely cute. Just do your little googley eyes, wave, smile and coo. Especially since the mother already said no. It also reminds me of service dogs. People want to pet them. Owner says no, they're working. They get all b**t hurt.. Respect people's choices. Respect people in general..

DOMINATORAMER − NTA, it’s super weird when strangers touch babies/toddlers.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Its weird to ask to hold a stranger's baby.. And even more weird to tickle/touch one. It's one thing to say hi to a baby when mom is holding the baby.. Anything other then that is off limits

cate2283 − NTA. I started teaching my kids consent early by telling people to ask them (when they were old enough to answer), as it was their own body. (Yes, I know it sounds weird except my older son is black and had dreadlocks from age 2-8, and white people just can't keep their hands to themselves with black hair.) I once yelled at a woman who touched my son despite him saying 'no.'. Kids don't exist as playthings for adults and should have their autonomy respected.

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nan1ta − NTA. Thank you for asserting your daughter's bodily autonomy.

[Reddit User] − Absolutely NTA. She should have listened to you, as the child’s mother. And parental intuition is real. Part of your job is to advocate for your child, which is what you did!

[Reddit User] − NTA. It is weird to tickle a stranger's baby. You told her not to.. She did.. You rightfully were angry.

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Bradford124n − NTA. People shouldn’t touch anything that doesn’t belong to them without permission. Not to say your daughter belongs to you, she is her own person, but as a small child she is unable to defend herself from what sadly is our scary world. Protecting her from someone who your daughter showed you powerful nonverbal signs that she did not want to be around does not under any circumstances make you the TA.

I’ll go as far as to say that any person willing to call you TA, who does not have children, or was not there to see the situation is actually the type of A**h*** that would think they have the right to touch someone else’s child without explicit permission and reason. This goes for dogs too. I touch nobody’s dog unless, without me even requesting, they say I should pet him because he seems to like me and loves being petted.

My own dog is a wonderfully friendly Lab, but if someone touches him without my permission, I get low-key pissed (but never say anything, of course). Your daughters best friend right now is you. You did the exact thing you should have. NTA. Maybe IATA many times in life, but I don’t care. Sometimes we gotta be TA to survive.

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LoonelyBoxx − NTA. She touched your kid after being told no. She should know why that’s not ok.

introusers1979 − How did your infant daughter run. im not asking to be a hater im legitimately confused.

These Reddit opinions are as sharp as a protective instinct, but do they miss the grandmother’s perspective on social politeness?

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This story is a vivid mix of love, limits, and courage. The mother’s stand for her daughter’s autonomy shut down unwanted touch but stirred family tension. Could a softer tone or family talk have eased the rift, or was her firmness the only way? What would you do if strangers touched your child? Share your thoughts—have you ever had to defend a loved one’s space?

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