AITA for getting my dad in trouble with the police?

Picture a dimly lit gas station parking lot, the air thick with tension as a 19-year-old girl watches her dad, reeking of beer, argue with another driver after a fender-bender. She’d begged him not to drive drunk, but he broke his promise, leaving her no choice but to act. When she quietly tips off a passing cop, her world flips—her dad’s in trouble, and her mom’s fury is palpable.

This Reddit story tugs at the heart, blending betrayal, safety, and tough love. Readers can feel the daughter’s dread and defiance as she makes a split-second choice. Was she right, or did she cross a line?

‘AITA for getting my dad in trouble with the police?’

My (19f) dad has always drunk quite a lot. I'd say he's a functioning a**oholic, he works and has a 'normal' life, but he has at least 5 drinks every single day, and can't go without. he often drinks more than that. We recently went to a concert. He drove since he promised he wouldn't drink until he got home. I made him promise, he often drinks and drives.

Well, he broke his promise. He had 4 beers before we left, that I saw, it might be more. I offered to drive, since I recently got my license. He refused. I offered to look for public transport options, he got angry and told me I could either walk or get in the car. So I did. Another car hit us. It wasn't my dad's fault, but if he was sober I'm pretty sure he would have reacted in time to prevent it.

While he and the other driver were filling in the insurance forms at a gas station parking lot, a police car came by for gas and stopped by to ask what happened. I pulled one of them aside and told them *exactly* what happened. My dad was taken to the police station, I'm not sure what happened, my mom picked me up. She was furious that I'd knowingly got him in trouble.

My dad hasn't talked to me at all since then. My mom is short and angry too. I mean, I was pissed. He broke his promise, and drove drunk even though there were other options. Even though I told him I didn't want to get in the car. But it probably was the wrong move.. English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if the sentences are weird.. AITA?

This gas station showdown isn’t just about a car crash—it’s a snapshot of a family grappling with alcoholism’s grip. The daughter’s decision to report her father’s drunk driving, after he blew 0.75‰ on a breathalyzer, stems from fear for her safety and others’. Her father’s refusal to let her drive or take public transport highlights a deeper issue: denial of his addiction.

Dr. George Koob, director of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, notes, “Alcohol impairs judgment and reaction time, making drunk driving a leading cause of fatal crashes” . With 32% of fatal crashes in the U.S. involving alcohol , the daughter’s action likely prevented worse outcomes. Her mother’s anger, though, suggests enabling behavior, common in families dodging addiction’s reality.

This reflects a broader issue: the stigma of confronting addiction within families. The daughter’s choice was brave but costly, straining trust. She could seek support from groups like Al-Anon (source) to navigate family dynamics. Openly discussing her father’s alcoholism with a counselor might also help.

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Check out how the community responded:

Reddit brought the heat, dishing out raw takes with a dash of tough love. Here’s what the community had to say about this high-stakes drama.

MicIsOn - NTA. Your mom is enabling this s**t. I think you saw it as a last resort to help your dad. He was super irresponsible to drive and put everyone’s life in danger.

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Aarya_Raghaven - NTA. Drunk driving is dangerous, and this could have ended up way worse. Hopefully this will discourage him from doing it again.

ST0IC_ - NTA but be prepared for the fallout from this. You may not know it yet, but your family is in for some financial hard times. Hopefully your dad will learn something from this, but for now, there's going to be a lot of anger, resentment, and trust issues on top of the financial issues that drunk driving leads to.. Just remember, you did the right thing and that your dad now has the choice to learn from this.

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Illuminator007 - ESH Your Dad: Drinking and driving. Failure to live up to his word not to. Pressuring you to get into the car.. Your Mom: Enabling his behavior. Berating you for challenging it. You: And this is going to be the tough one to hear. You're not an a**hole for reporting your father to the cops.

You are an a**hole for getting into the car. In so doing you condoned his behavior. You're 19, and you're an adult. 'No' is a complete sentence. For any number of reasons, that 'no' is probably really hard for you right now, but you need to get used to saying it. Especially if you have an a**oholic in your life.

[Reddit User] - Woof. This is a lot to digest. I wish I had more information, but I guess I don’t need anymore because here are the facts: 1. Regardless of whether or not your dad is an a**oholic, YOU are uncomfortable with the level of drinking he’s been doing.. 2. He promised you he wouldn’t drink and broke that promise..

3. You offered to drive, he refused 4. You wound up in an accident. The other car hit you and it’s impossible to say whether or not it could have been avoided if he were sober (I know you said he could have), but you were at risk.. This is all the information needed. NTA. You did what you get was right.

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[Reddit User] - NTA. You were not the ass when you told the police what happened. Your dad has a drinking problem and that clouds your judgement and your ability to react and that is probably what contributed to the accident. It might not have been his fault, but not reacting in time was likely as a result of the alcohol.

That being said however driving drunk is a serious offense and your dad could lose his license. If that happens you might not have heard the end of this situation from your mom who might keep harping on you about it even though the only one who should be harped upon is your dad for driving drunk.

All of that being said I do think that you should learn a little personal responsibility. Never get in a car with someone who has been drinking it could cost you your life. Even though your dad was upset and wanting you to get in the car you could have resisted and gone back in the house.

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He was not going to lift you up and physically put you in the car. I think the reason you got in the car is because you really wanted to go to a concert which shows you value the concert more than your own life. Hopefully you grow out of that in time.

Just_the_doctor1988 - NTA he was putting himself,you and other drivers at risk.Maybe this will hot home that he has a problem.

[Reddit User] - NTA You could have died and so could he. I hope this makes him realize that he has a problem and I hope he takes steps to correct that problem. I'm so sorry you had to get in the accident but good for you for not lying for him.

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cloudyeonies - NTA. First of all, I'm glad you're safe. I grew up in a very similar situation to you, and without going into too much detail, let's just say I understand to an extent. You did the right thing because this might make him realize how much danger he's been putting you and your family in due to his a**oholism.

This could be his wake up call and the first step for him to seek help. They're angry at you now but I hope they later remember this as the night your father realized he needed to get treatment for his addiction.. You did absolutely nothing wrong, and I wish both you and your father the best.

Special-Attitude-242 - NTA. Your dad could have killed someone! If he got back on the road and had another accident you may have been killed. Drinking and driving is so dangerous. It sounds like he needs a wakeup call. And soon, before he actually does kill someone.

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From calling out the dad’s recklessness to urging the daughter to stand firm, these opinions pack a punch. But are they practical, or just Reddit’s armchair wisdom at play?

This tale of a broken promise and a bold choice lays bare the messy intersection of loyalty and safety. The daughter’s stand against her dad’s drunk driving was a cry for change, but it cost her family harmony. What would you do in her shoes—stay silent or speak up, knowing the fallout? Share your thoughts and experiences below. How do you handle tough calls when love and danger collide?

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