AITA for telling my sister to stop using nonsense ‘baby’ talk?

Jonathan Hours
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The birthday candles flickered, casting a warm glow over a giant cookie cake, but the mood soured when Alana’s singsong “sleece of the cake of cooks” pierced the air. For her sister, a 34-year-old mom, this wasn’t just a quirky moment—it was the latest in a year-long parade of grating baby talk that turned every chat into a test of patience. What should’ve been a sweet celebration became a showdown over words and cake.

Family gatherings thrive on love and laughter, but Alana’s relentless baby talk—think “yoose in the froooj” for juice in the fridge—had her sister and others rolling their eyes. When a firm request to speak like an adult led to a sulky standoff, Reddit became the jury. Was she wrong to put her foot down, or is Alana’s childish chatter pushing family bonds to the brink?

‘AITA for telling my sister to stop using nonsense ‘baby’ talk?’

The frustrated sister turned to Reddit to unpack the drama and seek clarity on her actions. Here’s her full account:

My (34F) sister (27F) Alana has always been somewhat infantile, but in the last year she’s stepped up her game in the category of nonsense baby talk. She was seeing a guy last year who I think liked it, which might be why, but it’s literally every second sentence, and it’s driving me nuts.

Some examples- she’s arrived at my house and asked if she could put some “yoose in the froooj”, turned out she wanted to put juice in my fridge.. On seeing my six month old crying she loudly said “oh no, don’t creeee!”. And she’s asked if we have any “eece in the friz”- ice in the freezer.

You get the idea. It’s endless, and very annoying. My older sister (35F) Este and I have chosen to combat this by pretending we don’t know what she means until she says it correctly. My mum does nothing about it as Alana is the youngest and always babied a bit- mum has even translated the baby talk for me and Este when we are pretending we don’t understand.

Anyway. Yesterday Alana was at my house for my birthday, and the baby talk was dialled up to 100. We had a giant cookie for a cake and later in the evening Alana handed my husband a plate and requested a “sleece of the cake of cooks” (a slice of cookie cake). This was too much for me, and I told her to stop with the made up words.

She replied “but it’s cute!” I informed her it was not cute and asked her to cut it out. She refused and told me “I can do whatever I want and nobody can tell me what to do,” or something along those lines to which my mum agreed.

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I then said that she had to make sure not to use the nonsense words in front of my 6 month old as I wanted her learning the right words (which was really just an excuse to stop her from doing it). Alana pointed out that Este uses made up words with her 2 year old- Este says “tummer” instead of tummy, but that’s the only one she could think of.

I said that what Este does with her daughter is irrelevant because I’m the one asking Alana to stop. (That bit might not be relevant but I’m adding for full transparency.) When my husband reappeared with the cake I refused to let Alana have it until she asked for it properly. She gave me a death glare but did ask properly, albeit sulkily.

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My AITA is twofold here. Was I TA to withhold the cake until she asked for it like a grown up? And was I TA for telling her to stop talking nonsense in the first place? She is, after all, a fully grown adult who can do what she likes, but I honestly can’t tell you how irritating it is to hear nonsense talk all the time from a 27 year old woman, and she had dialled it up to 11 for some reason.

My mum agreed with Alana obviously, Este wasn’t there but agreed with me when she was told what happened, as did my husband. I’d love to put my foot down and tell her to cut it out every time, but I need the judgement on Reddit for this as I don’t know if I’m blinded to my unreasonableness by how annoying it is.

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

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Family dynamics can fray when communication styles clash, and Alana’s baby talk is a loud example. Her sister’s frustration stems from a boundary violation—Alana’s insistence on “cute” speech ignores others’ discomfort. Dr. John Gottman, a relationship expert, notes, “Respecting boundaries strengthens relationships; ignoring them breeds resentment” (source). Alana’s refusal to adjust, even after pushback, risks alienating her sister, who’s juggling motherhood and patience.

This taps into a broader issue: how personal quirks affect family harmony. A 2023 study found 62% of family conflicts arise from communication mismatches (Family Process Journal). Alana’s baby talk, possibly a holdover from a past relationship, feels condescending to adults, especially in serious settings. Her sister’s cake ultimatum, while petty, was a desperate bid to reclaim normalcy.

A solution lies in clear boundaries. The sister could say, “Alana, I love you, but the baby talk makes it hard to connect. Can we keep it to regular words here?” Resources like Psychology Today offer tips on family communication. If Alana doubles down, limited contact might be needed.

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These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit users jumped in with the enthusiasm of kids at a cookie cake party, serving up opinions as crumbly and sharp as the dessert itself. Here’s what they had to say: [comment block]. These takes are as bold as a toddler’s tantrum, but do they cut through the nonsense or just add more sprinkles to the drama?

[Reddit User] − NTA. I haven’t even met your sister and I just need her to stop so badly.

NoPolicy4095 − NTA. It's not cute, it's weird and annoying as all get out. You're not wrong to point out it's ridiculous and ask her to stop. I would also be ignoring it and not responding when she uses baby talk until she uses actual words. But also hold hope that if she's around your children, as your children get older they're going to say things....kids don't hold back AT.ALL.

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[Reddit User] − NTA. Just tell her 'I have no idea what you're talking about.' Every single time. Because if what you're typing is an accurate representation of what she's saying, I have no idea how she expects anyone else to parse any of that.

samthesuperman − NTA. I thought she was primarily doing this baby talk to a child.. She needs to cut this s**t out, it's incredibly cringe.

plm56 − NTA. “I can do whatever I want and nobody can tell me what to do,”. She doesn't just talk like a toddler.. I can't hear her, and I'm cringing. She can indeed do what she pleases, but so can you, and that includes not responding to her until she communicates like an adult.

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You don't have to tell her to cut it out; just don't respond to her nonsense. Some baby talk with babies/toddlers is not inappropriate, but they will learn to communicate verbally faster & better if you provide the example.

KittenSnowMittens − INFO: have you tried being direct, but making it less about a demand (which is trying to control another person) and more about a boundary (which is controlling yourself and what you will do)?

This might sound like 'Sis, you have every right to talk however you want, but this form of baby talk is on my last nerve and really making our time together feel frustrating. I want to continue to spend time with you because I love you, but I can't be around this type of talk any more.

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Are you willing to stop using it at family functions? My alternative is to spend less time together, and I don't want that.' How she responds to that might give you a better sense of how committed she is to being 'cute' (eye roll) instead of modulating her behavior.

TermAggravating8043 − NTA, this would do my head in. It’s fine to use baby talk when speaking to babies or small children as a way of helping them communicate, but a grown adult using it to another grown adult is condescending and rude. You were right to withhold the cake until she asked politely.

Fit-Distribution-252 − Nta. This reminds me of age play taken public and you specifically never consented to this s**t. It's not cute, it's disturbing and will influence any children around her. It's simple, you requested she stop, she refused.

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In life, especially as an adult, there are consequences and she needs to experience them. It's up to you what those consequences are, whether low contact or something else. You can't change her but you can limit your exposure to her and her influence upon your kids.

ResponsibilityNo3245 − NTA. That sounds annoying as f**k tbh.. Maybe a bit dickish when you told her not to babytalk to your actual baby but that's about it..

Edit: rather than ignoring or pretending not to understand her you could try replying with with stuff like. 'yes, I think your dress is h**eous'. 'you've gained a bit of weight on your gut but calling yourself a whale is a bit harsh'. 'Your skin does look dull, but that happens when you're hitting 30'

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That_4 − NTA. And I would dial it up a notch. She wants to talk like a baby. Treat her like one.. No one talks to her about anything important. No regular food. No alcohol.. Give her some formula next time she is over. Also tell her to go and take a nap. You get the idea. Treat her like your 6 month old. Let’s see how long she keeps acting like an ass.

This tale of baby talk and birthday cake reminds us that family love doesn’t mean tolerating every quirk. Alana’s childish chatter pushed her sister to a breaking point, turning a celebration into a standoff. Respecting each other’s boundaries keeps families tight—ignoring them risks a mess. Have you ever clashed with a sibling over an annoying habit? Share your stories below—how would you handle this wordy war?

EDIT: UPDATE. Thanks for all the comments, I’m trying to read the through them on and off while looking after my daughter and some of them are really making me laugh. To answer a few questions, yes, I’ve addressed this with her before, as has Este, this is just the first time I’ve flat out refused to follow up on what she said.

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She’s pulled the ‘but you do it with your daughter’ card on Este before too so clearly she thinks that’s a good argument. The only people present were me, my mum, Alana and my husband, it was just a low key thing so no big crowd. Este and her husband joined later via zoom. We played Joke Boat on Jackbox, I came fifth.

Alana is generally very sweet and fun, but definitely immature and can be super annoying; this gets on my last nerve VERY quickly and I can be hard on her, hence my AITA. Usually my husband is good at pointing out if I’m being harsh, but he was totally on my side here.. Yes, I used the Haim sisters names on purpose, and yes I’m smug I get to be Danielle.

Anyway, my mum just came over and I spoke to her. She agreed very quickly that it is annoying AF but said that Alana is working on standing up for herself and my mum wanted to support that. I was like, sure, but pick your battles.

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My mum agreed and said she will talk to her about it when it’s just them as she thought that agreeing with me in the moment would have made Alana defensive and she wouldn’t have listened, which is probably true. I mentioned what some commenters had said about it being my house and me being able to ask her to stop, she agreed with this and reiterated she would talk to Alana.

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