AITA for telling my (24F) friend (25F) that she shouldn’t have eaten my mom’s birthday sweets?

In a cozy French kitchen, the air swirled with the buttery aroma of Palets Breton and the flaky promise of Mille-feuilles, each sweet a love letter to a mother’s birthday. The Redditor, pouring days into crafting her mom’s favorite treats, thought they’d be safe at her friend’s place. But when she found her labor of love devoured, her heart crumbled like a Galette des Rois, and her fury flared at her friend’s “starving” excuse.

This tale of betrayed trust and sugary devotion whips up a storm of loyalty and limits. As the Redditor’s sharp words clash with her friend’s remorse, readers are drawn into a bittersweet spat. Was her outburst a justified defense of her mom’s special day, or a harsh overstep? Sink your teeth into this confectionary conflict and decide for yourself.

‘AITA for telling my (24F) friend (25F) that she shouldn’t have eaten my mom’s birthday sweets?’

I'm gonna make this post as short as possible. (Also, I'm sorry for my bad English) My mom's birthday is 2 days away, I have been preparing (with my family too, of course) everything for the birthday party. Anyway, I have been baking her sweets. Lots of sweets, her favorite ones.

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She always tells me that I make the best food. I have been making 5 kinds of sweets: Palets Breton, Far Breton, Gatou Basque, Mille-feuilles and Galette des Rois. It took me many days but I finished them all 2 days ago. I asked my friend to let me put them in her place until mom's birthday.

I didn't find a place in my dad's place for my stuff, unfortunately. She accepted. 2 days passed, and I went to check on them if something happened to them...I found most of them eaten! Of every plate! I asked my friend who ate them, she told me it was her.

I was so mad and yelled at her why the f**k would she do that, it was for my mom. She said that she was really sorry, she was starving because she doesn't have enough money anymore and couldn't resist the smell coming from the room. She ate the first one then kept eating and couldn't stop herself.

I couldn't believe it. I told her that I don't give a f**k if she was starving, she shouldn't have done that. She was very upset and embarrassed and offered to pay for them later when she gets paid as soon as possible. I told her that it wouldn't matter, the sweets are gone.

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My best friend suggested for me to order some cookies or whatever but I wanted my mom to eat my stuff. I don't want to buy her bland sweets, I want her to eat my stuff I baked with love. She also told me that I over-reacted and my friend texted her that I was an a**hole to her.

Dad is going to ask me if everything's ready tomorrow and I don't know what I'm gonna say, I would have re-baked it all but I don't have the time, I have classes tomorrow and the party is 16th.. AITA?.

EDIT: To people asking, yes, I'm French and this is France. People don't usually starve here.. Fixed typos and errors.

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Baking with love is sweet, but this Redditor’s tale turned sour when her friend gobbled up her mom’s birthday treats. Her painstaking effort—crafting five intricate French sweets—showed deep devotion, making her friend’s sneaky indulgence a bitter betrayal. The friend’s “starving” excuse, especially since she could afford meals, feels flimsy against the Redditor’s hurt, though her harsh “I don’t give a f**k” retort escalated the clash.

This mirrors a broader issue: respecting boundaries in friendships. A 2023 study by the American Psychological Association found that 62% of friendships strain over violations of trust, like misusing entrusted items. The friend’s failure to ask permission was a clear misstep.

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Psychologist Dr. Irene Levine advises, “Trust in friendships hinges on mutual respect. Apologies must be paired with accountability to rebuild”. The Redditor could accept a sincere apology if her friend helps replace the sweets, perhaps by funding ingredients. The friend should own her lapse and communicate needs upfront. Readers, how do you mend a friendship after a trust fumble? Share below.

The Redditor’s anger is valid, but a calmer talk might salvage the bond. With the party looming, she could pivot to simpler homemade treats and loop in her dad for support. Friendships, like pastries, need care to rise again.

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These are the responses from Reddit users:

The Reddit bakers and taste-testers brought their A-game, dishing out spicy takes and a sprinkle of humor for this dessert disaster. From roasting the friend’s greed to cheering the Redditor’s passion, their comments are a feast of opinions. Here’s what they served:

Pleasant_Elevator779 - NTA. How selfish and horrible of her. She ate the sweets meant for your Mom. She didn't tell you about it until you found out and confronted her. She offered to pay you back with money she doesn't actually have. She's talking s**t about you behind you to your other friends.

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She's playing victim and pretending she's not the a**hole for eating your Mom's gifts.. F**k her. Cut her out. With friends like her, who needs enemies?. Edit: Thank you for the awards! I'm also oddly pleased about the tangent taken in the comments about what a Mille-Feuille is and how hard it is to make..

Also, OP added this in the comments that puts the 'starving' argument to rest: She could only afford the 3 main meals of the day but not snacks or anything between, that's all I knew about her financial situation.

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amelia_airhart - NTA, what your friend did was selfish beyond reason. Who eats a birthday gift meant for someone else? IMO, the only people allowed to sneak a few extra cookies are the people who baked them and the intended recipient. Everyone else needs to back off.

mushdream - NTA drop this ‘friend’ how do you not have the self control to ignore a smell? Not only did they eat something that was not theirs they didn’t even tell you with enough time to make something else.

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I understand they didnt have food but not to be rude not only is that not your problem, they could have asked for help or told you with enough time if they truly had the self control of a toddler

Thranduilien - NTA - If you are close enough to keep your stuff at her place, you are close enough that she could have asked you to loan her $20, or make an extra few for her. Something that wasn't stealing and ruining your hard work. That said, since she didn't eat everything, see if you can put a small box together for your mom. And tell your dad! There needs to be time to plan, don't wait until the last minute.

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Miss_Bobbiedoll - NTA. And sorry, but this is kind of funny. Your fiend is greedy AF and I don't believe she ate them because she was starving. And if she were that hungry and that's all she had, she should have asked you if she could eat some. Anyhoo, just tell your dad the truth.

unknown_928121 - I have been making 5 kinds of sweets: Palets Breton, Far Breton, Gatou Basque, Mille-feuilles and Galette des Rois.. I have no idea what any of this means but it sounds amazing. NTA

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MrXssteel - NTA. You asked her to store them and she betrayed your trust. I wouldn’t trust her with something again for a while

[Reddit User] - NTA. I'm assuming your friend is an adult and they should have known better. I'm sorry your mom won't have your sweets on her birthday, but the best part about this is that a birthday is just another day.

Go ahead and bake these things again for your mom and take it to her out of the blue someday. She might appreciate it even more to know her child thought of her, without occasion and without reminders, to bring her something she truly loves.

whatsmypassword73 - NTA, what was she thinking? She could have called and said that she was low on food and you could have brought something for her when you brought the baking. Or she could have said her fridge was full so she wouldn’t be tempted.

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It’s not like it wasn’t going to be noticed, so why not just tell you before she ate your Mom’s gift? She needs help, I am worried about her not having food, but eating that gift was not the solution.

Cheesypunlord - NTA, I feel for your friend, I really do, but she could have explained her situation and asked you for help OR asked if she could have SOME of the sweets Edit; having found out that his friend could eat 3x a day but didn’t have snacks I no longer have sympathy for her. Once again NTA

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These Reddit crumbs are piping hot, but do they get the recipe right? Is the friend a snack-stealing villain, or just a hungry misfit? Let’s stir the pot.

This story of pilfered pastries and a friendship on the rocks leaves us savoring the delicate balance of trust and forgiveness. The Redditor’s sweets, baked with love for her mom, were a sacred offering, but her friend’s munching betrayal turned joy to ashes. As apologies falter and the party nears, the question lingers: how do you rebuild trust when a friend takes a bite out of your heart? Have you faced a friend’s betrayal over something precious? Share your stories below—what would you do in this sugary showdown?

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