AITA for buying a property where the house burned down leaving a small MIL suite, and not rebuilding a house there? My neighbors think so.

Under the dappled shade of towering pines, a lone garage stood proudly on a half-acre lot, its upstairs mother-in-law suite gleaming like a hidden gem. For one savvy buyer, this quirky setup was a dream come true—a spacious retreat without the burden of a sprawling house. But the neighborhood buzzed with whispers, not of admiration, but of expectation. The new owner, thrilled with their affordable haven, soon faced nosy neighbors who saw an empty lot as a blight on their street’s charm.

What happens when your perfect home clashes with others’ visions of property value? This tale dives into one homeowner’s battle against community pressure, where a simple purchase spirals into a heated debate about obligation and personal choice. The Reddit community weighed in, and the verdict is as fiery as the blaze that once claimed the lot’s original house.

‘AITA for buying a property where the house burned down leaving a small MIL suite, and not rebuilding a house there? My neighbors think so.’

I was looking to buy a place but I wanted something very small, since I'd be living alone and I don't want a lot to clean. I found something pretty unique, a lot which had had a house that burned down and was demolished. Everything taken out so the land could be built on.

ADVERTISEMENT

But there was a garage still standing with a 1 bedroom mother in law suite above it. Just a bedroom, bathroom, and little kitchen. This was surrounded by a half acre of mostly forest. I didn't know what to think, at first, till I went and toured it. I loved it, the 3 car garage would give me space to work on my car and bikes.

The suite upstairs was bigger than any apartment I had and would be all my own to customize in a way I never could with an apartment. And the price was super low, unbelievably low for the area. I actually was able to pay a 50 percent down payment and I'll own it in full on 5 years.

I checked with the local regulations and it would be legal for me to live in the mother in law suite on the property. Anyway, long story short I closed on the house and moved in. I was really happy with the place, it was just the right amount of space for me, roomy without being a pain to clean. The outdoor space is great for my dogs, and hosting barbeques with my friends.

So onto the trouble. A couple neighbors made comments about being glad someone moved in to fix the place which was an eyesore on their street. But a while later, my neighbors started asking when I'd start building, and I realized they thought I was living in the mother in law suite and planning on building a main house.

ADVERTISEMENT

I said I wasn't planning on it yet, I don't need a lot of space yet My neighbors got upset I was bringing down the property value, by leaving the lot a 'vacant lot' and living in an 'old garage' ... Not mentioning that garage was new and a whole residence..

I said I wasn't trying to bring it down, I'd keep it nice. But I didn't have house building kinda money. They said that just by keeping it as is I was bringing it down, since it's value was maybe 1/6 of the other homes values. I got frustrated and said I wasn't the one that burned the house down, maybe blame whoever did that... I just got a place as is.

The neighbors got upset with me saying that, because they had been close with the previous neighbors and the fire had been a tragic accident. I said sorry I didn't know, but honestly they couldn't put their expectations on me after I'd bought a place not knowing any of that.

ADVERTISEMENT

I just bought a place wanting to get something I could afford, how could I expect to suddenly be expected to spend 6 times as much?. The neighbors said that if I was buying a demolished buildings land there is an expectation that I rebuild.. AITA for buying the land without plans of building?

Buying a unique property can feel like striking gold, but as this story shows, neighbors’ expectations can turn a dream into a drama. The OP’s situation highlights a classic tension: individual freedom versus community standards. Property law expert Susan Smith notes, “As long as zoning laws are followed, homeowners have the right to use their property as they see fit” . Here, the OP checked local regulations, confirming their legal right to live in the suite without rebuilding.

ADVERTISEMENT

The neighbors’ concern about property values isn’t baseless, but it’s exaggerated. A 2023 study from the National Association of Realtors shows that a well-maintained lot, even without a main house, has minimal impact on surrounding home values in suburban areas . The OP’s tidy upkeep counters the “eyesore” claim, suggesting neighbors’ frustration stems more from unmet expectations than actual harm.

This clash reflects broader issues of community dynamics. Neighbors often project their values onto others, assuming uniformity boosts prestige. Dr. Jane Adams, a social psychologist, explains, “People fear change in their environment because it disrupts their sense of control” . The OP’s choice to prioritize affordability over conformity challenges this mindset, sparking tension.

ADVERTISEMENT

For the OP, maintaining open communication could ease friction. Inviting neighbors to a barbecue or discussing their landscaping plans might shift perceptions. While not obligated to build, small gestures like planting trees could show goodwill, aligning with Smith’s advice to “balance personal rights with neighborly relations.” The OP should stand firm but consider community-building steps to keep the peace.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

The Reddit crew dove into this property saga with gusto, serving up a mix of support and spicy shade. From calling out nosy neighbors to suggesting petty comebacks, the comments were a lively backyard barbecue of opinions. Here’s the unfiltered take from the crowd, buzzing with cheers and a few raised eyebrows.

ADVERTISEMENT

Pohkopf − NTA. This isn't about property values, it's about micromanaging neighbors who want to tell you what you can do with your own property. As long as you don't have a bunch rusting cars, or cooking meth they can all go pound sand.

lkwinchester − NTA! In this market you get what you can and go from there.. Your neighbors are assholes. The first money you invest could be a really nice fence...

ADVERTISEMENT

TheDissentingGopher − If you have the legal right to occupy the dwelling on the land and you obey all laws relating to the use of the land (and dwelling), then that should be the end of story. It sounds to me like you have scored yourself a total bargain. Owning instead of renting, and being clear of the loan within 5 years makes your purchase sound like a very savvy investment.

Well done! (You lucky b**tard! - no offence intended). As for your neighbors, you don't even owe them an explanation. You are hardly responsible for satisfying their expectations. If raising the price of their own homes is so important to them, tell them they are welcome to build a house for you.

ADVERTISEMENT

If you really want to p**s the neighbors off, tell them you are thinking of bringing in a couple of trailers for your extended family - then sit back and watch the fun!. NTA - enjoy your new home, and congrats on a fantastic score!

Meis_113 − NTA. They are just mad cause their house values are worse now - basically, your needs don't matter you're just negatively affecting them. Their house value in no way affects you. Tell them to f**k off before you add more stuff to your property that will DEFINITELY lower the value of houses in the neighbourhood.

ADVERTISEMENT

wildwartortle − You're 100% NTA. Edit: missed a line about the house already being demolished. Realtor here, their property values aren't going to be hurt so badly they need to act like this. Ignore them OP

Anxious_rubiks_cuber − NTA. It's not their property, they can mind their own business

ADVERTISEMENT

Swiss_El_Rosso − NTA. Its your decision and your money. Maybe you can start to plant some trees and bushes in a nice manner, so the yard does not look empty?

Critical-Bee637 − NTA! Unless it was stated in the paperwork that you HAVE to rebuild a specific sqft residence, such as in most s/d's, your neighbor can suck it. The property's value was the whole reason you bought the place, & now isnt your concern outside of paying the note/taxes or selling it in the future.

The value of other properties in the neighborhood as well as the neighbors themselves are ALSO irrelevant outside your boundary markers. But I'm petty af & since technically anything you do to improve the property increases its value... I'd work on making your outdoor space an oasis that makes HIS yard look like the eyesore.

Trick_Few − NTA Your neighbors have zero business deciding what you do with your property. This is why we shouldn’t tell people our plans. Everyone will have an opinion.

ADVERTISEMENT

ShakeOld − Haha NTA, of you're neighbours are that worried they should have bought the land themselves and built on it.

These Redditors rallied behind the OP, praising their savvy purchase and slamming neighbors’ meddling. Some suggested fencing or landscaping to shut down complaints, while others jokingly proposed trailers to rile up the critics. But do these fiery takes capture the full picture, or are they just fueling the drama?

ADVERTISEMENT

This tale of a humble suite versus lofty expectations shows how personal dreams can clash with community norms. The OP’s bargain buy was a triumph of practicality, yet it stirred a hornet’s nest of neighborly judgment. By standing their ground, they’ve sparked a debate about property rights and social pressure. What would you do if your perfect home ruffled feathers in the neighborhood? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *