WIBTA for sending neighbor a cease and desist letter?

In a tranquil suburban neighborhood, where new homeowners dream of peace, one Redditor finds themselves in a brewing battle over their property line. Just weeks after moving in with a newborn, they noticed their neighbor’s kids treating their driveway like an art studio and their garage door like a crash pad. The neighbor himself added insult to injury, parking his trailer on their land and dragging garbage cans through their gravel, leaving chaos behind.

Despite marking their property with rocks and politely asking the neighbor to stop, the intrusions continued, met with dismissive claims that “no one cared before.” The Redditor’s patience frays as the neighbor’s entitlement grows, pushing them to consider a cease and desist letter. With a blend of frustration and suburban drama, this tale unfolds as Reddit weighs in on a classic clash of boundaries.

‘WIBTA for sending neighbor a cease and desist letter?’

Last fall we moved into a new house and less than two weeks later, had a baby. We were pretty focused on the whole parenting thing and failed to notice how often the neighbor on one side was using our property for several things without any kind of permission or discussion.

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It started with his kids spending their days in our driveway drawing with sidewalk chalk. We had to ask them to stop because we seriously feared running them over when backing out of the garage as they have absolutely no supervision or regard for cars.

They stopped drawing and started using our garage door as a bumper stop while riding their scooters and bikes. They physically bashed into the garage door and dented it. I asked them to stop. After a dozen or so instances, they finally stopped.

In the spring, we noticed that the dad was parking his trailer on our side of the property between our two driveways. The property line is very clear with fences and different types of landscaping. In addition, he was pulling his garbage cans through our gravel and making huge tracks.

As we're in the middle of a pandemic and we have a baby, we decided to write a note and leave it with our information while also lining the property line with large rocks. Never heard from them but they had moved the rocks into a pile and the front of our side of the property.

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We moved the rocks back again and thought we had made our position very clear. At the beginning of June the dad/husband came and rang our door. He proceeded to tell us that because he's parked his trailer like that since he moved in and no one has cared before so we can't care either

At no point did he ask if he could park on our side or use our property, he said 'It's never been a problem and I should be able to do it.' We politely said we did not give him permission to do so and explained that we intended to landscape the area and his trailer and use of our property would ruin the landscaping we had planned.

The entire conversation was difficult because he spoke over me the entire time and talked to me like a child. At the end of the confrontation, he said we were 'rude neighbors' and stormed off. Since then, he parks further over, moves our landscaping rocks constantly

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and aggressively moves his garbage cans through the gravel leaving marks like he was zig zagging back and forth. This weekend I started taking photos as proof of his parking and the way he's ruining our gravel with his garbage cans.

He came out and glared at me. I, very nicely, again, asked him to stop. He replied 'Why?' and when I said because it's my property and we've asked him not to he replied 'Whatever.' and walked away. Now we come to today. I'm done.

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I am so frustrated that this guy feels like he is entitled to unquestioned use of property that is not his. TLDR Neighbor with free range children uses, parks, and ruins my property without permission and will not stop even when asked. WIBTA for sending a cease and desist?

This neighborly feud highlights a universal issue: the importance of respecting property boundaries. The OP’s frustration stems from their neighbor’s blatant trespassing—parking a trailer, damaging gravel, and allowing kids to dent their garage door—despite clear requests to stop. The neighbor’s insistence that prior leniency justifies his actions reveals an entitled mindset that dismisses the OP’s rights.

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Property disputes often arise from unclear expectations or poor communication. Real estate expert Barbara Corcoran notes, “Clear boundaries, both physical and verbal, are essential for neighborly harmony.” The OP’s efforts to set boundaries with rocks and conversations were reasonable, yet ignored, escalating the conflict.

Studies show that over 30% of homeowners face boundary disputes, often due to assumptions about shared spaces. The neighbor’s refusal to respect the OP’s property risks legal consequences, as trespassing can lead to liability for damages, like the dented garage door.

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A cease and desist letter could formalize the OP’s stance, but practical steps like installing cameras or permanent barriers, such as cemented posts, might deter further intrusions. Consulting a lawyer to document violations ensures the OP protects their property while maintaining a civil approach, avoiding unnecessary escalation.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

The Reddit community firmly supported the OP, condemning the neighbor’s disregard for property boundaries as disrespectful and entitled. They viewed the neighbor’s actions—moving landscaping rocks, parking on the OP’s property, and ignoring requests to stop—as a deliberate power play, not a misunderstanding, warranting stronger measures.

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Redditors recommended practical solutions like setting up cameras, posting no-parking signs, or involving a tow company to enforce boundaries. They saw the OP’s consideration of a cease and desist letter as a justified response after repeated attempts at civility failed, emphasizing that property rights must be upheld to maintain neighborhood peace.

TheCookie_Momster − NTA sounds like you’ve exhausted your options up until this point. But what will the cease and desist letter accomplish? Will you have it notarized and mail it with a signature required to prove he received it? What will the consequence be if he persists? aside from pictures you should put up a camera.

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If he causes any real damage then you’re going to want it on film of him doing it.. Can you put in a more permanent solution like cemented in posts instead of the rocks?. short of them moving I’m not sure you’ll ever be at peace as long as they are your neighbors.

MagicalGlitterBitch − NTA. Time for cameras, and a lawyer letter.

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_LadyRainicorn − NTA. He sounds as though he has no respect or regard for you or your property and hasn’t listened when you have approached him about it several times. Sounds like it has gone on far too long and you have every right to begin to take further action.

LetsD01t − NTA. Get some legal advice and do everything by the book. He's a d**k, he's trespassing, his kids trespass, they're going to destroy your property (landscaping etc).

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You said people have called you petty for this. Nooope petty would be getting some tyre spikes and putting them on the property, but hidden so he always gets flat tyres when he trespasses.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Get legal consult and enforce your rights over your property!

pedestrian_tony − NTA, i’d crosspost this to r/legaladvice

Smudgikins − NTA we had a similar neighbor problem. He started with half a small trailer, and we didn't say anything. The workmen I hired were Amish and hired him to haul wood for my shed base. He left his 20 foot trailer behind.

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I offered to paint it pink and use it for a planter. He said he'd move it and didn't. At the 3 week mark, he added a third trailer in the driveway, so that if my 92 year old mother had an emergency, the ambulance could not get in.

starfishy99 − NTA that’s so annoying! they think that just because the old neighbors didn’t say anything that you also wouldn’t say anything. if the letter you send doesn’t work then seriously i would glue the rocks down to the sidewalk or wherever they are because there’s no need for them to park their trailer on your yard.

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not to mention, if they had simply asked to then maybe you would be nice and allow them to. i would also ask your other neighbors how they feel about your neighbor(not in a gossipy way) just to get a feel for the rest of the neighborhood

Redpacmanbuddy − Here’s what you do. Establish contact with a tow company. I’m assuming you are in US, idk about how this works in other countries. The tow company will give you a sign that says no parking, put it up where the neighbor has been leaving the trailer. Next time he does it, have it towed at his expense and I bet you he won’t do it again

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jen4k2 − NTA -- as long as you try and keep the note very civil, very kind, and very short. It sounds like he's acting like a child, so you *cannot* give him any excuses to behave badly.

Make a bullet-point list of behaviors you'd like him to stop, and a time-frame you expect compliance. Invite them to give you feedback if any of your behaviors are rude.. Kill 'em with kindness, but take no sh\*t.

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This suburban showdown serves up a reminder that clear boundaries make for good neighbors. The OP’s struggle to protect their property from an entitled intruder underscores the need for firm yet civil action. Have you ever faced a neighbor overstepping your space? Share your experiences and strategies below—how do you keep the peace while guarding your turf?

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