AITA for telling my daughter she will struggle to get a boyfriend if she doesn’t lose weight?
A father’s attempt to offer advice during a family dinner spiraled into conflict when he suggested his overweight daughter lose weight to improve her chances of finding a boyfriend. Now, he’s left wondering if his good intentions crossed a hurtful line.
This Reddit tale weaves through body image, parental guidance, and emotional boundaries. Was his advice a helpful nudge, or a misstep that stung too deep? Let’s unpack this dinner table drama.
‘AITA for telling my daughter she will struggle to get a boyfriend if she doesn’t lose weight?’
Parental advice on weight can be a tightrope, especially when tied to social acceptance like dating. The father’s intent to boost his daughter’s confidence and health was reasonable, but linking it to male attention risked reinforcing shallow standards, potentially exacerbating her insecurities. Her reaction suggests a deeper sensitivity, possibly from past unaddressed struggles.
Dr. Susan Albers, a psychologist specializing in eating issues, notes, “Weight comments from parents can backfire—focus on health, not appearance, to avoid shame.” A 2023 American Psychological Association study found 55% of young adults with weight concerns cite family pressure as a trigger for self-esteem issues. His past encouragement (runs, healthy food) shows care, but timing and framing were off.
This reflects broader body image dynamics. Dr. Albers advises, “Offer support, not solutions—listen first.” The split verdict (NTA vs. YTA) hinges on delivery—intent alone doesn’t erase impact.
Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:
Reddit’s family advisors dished out a mix of support and critique. Here’s what they had to say:
![[Reddit User] - NTA, but your daughter's clearly not looking for advice, let alone to make lifestyle changes. If you're tired of the venting, just make some noncommittal sympathetic noises and change the subject, or ask her what *her* plan is for improving the situation. Don't bring up an issue she's already made a conscious choice to dismiss.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/218010cm-05.png)
From praising his heart to slamming his timing, these takes stir the debate. Do they settle the score, or is there more to this family feast?
This dinner table dilemma highlights the fine line between helpful advice and hurtful critique. The father’s suggestion, though well-intended, landed poorly, fueling his daughter’s pain rather than her progress. Should he have stayed silent, or tried a different angle? How would you handle guiding a family member on sensitive issues like weight? Share your thoughts below!
