AITA for having a vegetarian menu at my wedding?

Picture a wedding feast bursting with vibrant dishes—crisp salads, fragrant curries, and creamy pastas—but not a sliver of meat in sight. For one 30-year-old bride-to-be and her vegetarian partner, this dream menu reflects their lifestyle and love. Yet, her family’s outrage over a meatless wedding has turned their planning into a battlefield, with cries of “think about the guests!” ringing loud.

This Reddit AITA post serves up a spicy clash of personal values and family expectations. The OP stands firm, insisting her wedding should reflect her vegetarian ethos, while her family demands meat on the table. Reddit’s rallying behind her, but is she right to prioritize her vision? Let’s dig into this flavorful drama, where food choices become a recipe for conflict.

‘AITA for having a vegetarian menu at my wedding?’

As wedding bells loom, the OP and her partner crafted a vegetarian menu to celebrate their shared values—only to face a family showdown. Here’s the Reddit user’s story in their own words:

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Me (30f) and my partner (30M) are getting married next September and are in the early stages of planning. We have been vegetarian for a while now and would like to incorporate this into our day so we can eat everything on offer. We met with the caterers yesterday and created a menu that includes loads of delicious food that we love and will enjoy (nothing unusual and have two choices for each course).

My family especially seem outraged at the prospect of no meat being included and are arguing that we need to think about what our guests want. I feel like I have lived on sides at restaurants many times, and I should be allowed to have ONE day where I can eat food I enjoy and others can too!

I've said that people can have a bacon sarnie before the wedding if its that big of a deal and it won't harm anyone to go for one meal without meat. I feel like I'm going to be arguing about this with my family for the next 12 months. AITA?

This wedding menu spat reveals the tension between personal values and societal expectations. The OP’s choice to serve vegetarian food reflects her identity, but her family’s pushback highlights a common clash over catering to guests. Both sides have valid points: the couple wants authenticity, while the family fears guest discomfort.

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Dr. Melanie Joy, a social psychologist and author of Why We Love Dogs, Eat Pigs, and Wear Cows, notes, “Food choices are deeply tied to identity, and challenging them can feel like a personal attack” (Source). The OP’s family may see meat as a cultural norm, making her vegetarian menu feel like a rejection of their traditions. A 2023 Food Research International study found that 70% of omnivores feel uneasy at meat-free events due to unfamiliarity (Source).

This issue ties to broader debates about dietary inclusivity. The OP’s menu is inclusive for vegetarians, unlike many events where they’re sidelined. Advice: The OP could communicate her vision clearly, perhaps adding a note in invitations: “Join us for a vegetarian feast celebrating our values!” Labeling allergens, as Reddit suggests, ensures safety. Couples therapy might help navigate family tensions.

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit didn’t mince words, dishing out zesty takes on this meatless wedding drama. Here’s what the community had to say about the OP’s vegetarian vision:

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J4zz_h4nds − NTA. If you had a 100% meat-only menu: that might exclude folks from being able to eat. This is not that. Meat eaters won't die if they have one meal without meat in it. I'm speaking from experience: I once ate a salad for lunch and didn't die, so I know it'll be okay...

RiverTam86 − I swear do people never have an apple or a salad for lunch? I'm a complete carnivore and I've totally just had a meatless salad or a big bowl of garlic broccoli for a meal many times (I worked from home don't come for me about broccoli on lunch). NTA.

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BlondeinShanghai − NTA. That being said, the only vegetarian wedding I've ever been to had the most fart filled dance floor ever. Your wedding. Vegetarian offers just as many delicious options and as much sustenance as meat meals. Your family will get over it.

C_Majuscula − NTA. As long as you're taking common allergens into account (nuts, soy, maybe corn) everything else is up to you.

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MultiFazed − NTA. As an omnivore myself, I don't understand how people can get so butthurt over not having meat for a single meal. Not being a vegetarian doesn't make you contractually-obligated to eat meat with every meal!

Have they never had grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch? Or pasta aglio e olio with a side salad for dinner? A dish of beans and rice? Something Indian with paneer instead of meat? Tofu? A friggin' Impossible burger?

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[Reddit User] − NTA. Besides, as a meat eater myself, I have found that I can enjoy lots of meat-free entrees. I'm sure your carnivorous friends can go without meat for one meal.

Blkcdngaybro − NTA. Anyone who is attending for meat is an AH. They can forgo it for one meal. They’ll live.

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BracedRhombus − NTA. This is your day, not theirs. It's only one meal, I don't attend weddings for a meal. It might broaden their food horizons, too.

Trifecta_life − NTA and stop discussing the menu. The one caveat I’d add though is who is paying? If it’s them, they may need to get a say. But I’d also point out if there’s a cost-benefit to them - where I am the vegetarian options are usually cheaper.

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bitchy_badger − NTA. vegetarian meals can be awesome and I love weddings as it’s a chance to try food I might not get elsewhere. As was mentioned earlier just make sure anything with a common allergen ie nuts is labeled so people know.

These Reddit bites are full of flavor, but do they capture the whole dish? Is a meat-free wedding a bold move or a recipe for guest grumbles?

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This vegetarian wedding saga tosses up a hearty mix of personal choice and family pressure. The OP’s dream of a meat-free celebration reflects her values, but her family’s meat-craving outcry shows how food can spark fiery debates. Reddit’s cheering her on, but what’s your take? Have you ever faced pushback over a personal choice at a big event? What would you serve at your dream wedding? Spill your thoughts below and keep the convo cooking!

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