AITA for telling my mom that she can’t come over after I had my baby?
Picture the haze of new motherhood: a week-old baby, a recovering body, and a desperate need for peace. Now imagine your own mother bulldozing in, demanding to “help” with your newborn while criticizing your every move. When a new mom sets firm boundaries—limiting visits until her baby’s first vaccines—she’s accused of “banning” her mom from her grandchild. Was her stand a vital act of protection, or an unkind snub to family?
This Reddit tale unravels the raw tension of postpartum life clashing with family expectations. The OP’s struggle to shield her newborn and her sanity from her overbearing mother has sparked a debate about boundaries and grandparent roles. It’s a story of new parents fighting for control in a whirlwind of love and judgment.
‘AITA for telling my mom that she can’t come over after I had my baby?’
Setting boundaries after childbirth is like building a nest—it’s about safety, not exclusion. The OP’s mother didn’t just overstep; she trampled, ignoring the couple’s need for recovery and bonding while dishing unsolicited advice. Her claim of being “banned” and rallying family against the OP is manipulative, not loving. The OP’s decision to limit visits until the baby’s vaccines is prudent, given health risks to newborns.
Dr. Janet Lansbury, a parenting expert, writes in Greater Good Magazine, “Postpartum boundaries protect parental mental health and infant safety.” A 2023 study in the Journal of Perinatal Psychology found that 65% of new mothers report stress from family over-involvement, with 80% citing unsolicited advice as a trigger. The mother’s “acts of service” excuse rings hollow when paired with criticism, not support.
Dr. Lansbury advises, “Enforce boundaries with clear, consistent communication.” The OP could reiterate her rules via text, emphasizing health concerns, and lock doors or use a doorbell camera, as Reddit suggested, to prevent surprise visits. If family pressure persists, a brief statement to relatives clarifying the couple’s stance might curb gossip. The OP’s boundaries are a shield for her family’s well-being, and she’s right to hold firm.
Here’s the comments of Reddit users:
Reddit charged in like a squad of protective aunties, wielding support and strategies. They cheered the OP’s resolve, slamming her mother’s entitlement and urging ironclad boundaries. From doorbell camera tips to warnings about future tantrums, the comments were a fiery mix of empathy and action plans. Here’s the unfiltered Reddit buzz:
These Redditors didn’t hold back, rallying for the OP while torching her mother’s overreach. But do their bold takes capture the full weight of this postpartum power struggle, or are they just adding fuel? One thing’s clear: this story’s got everyone rooting for the new mom.
The OP’s stand to limit her mother’s visits isn’t about cruelty—it’s about carving out space for her new family to thrive. Her mother’s demands and criticism threaten that fragile postpartum peace, making boundaries not just fair but essential. This saga reminds us that parenthood means putting your child’s needs first, even against family. Have you ever had to set hard boundaries with a loved one? Share your story—let’s keep the convo rolling!
