I 22F and my bf 35M, he said he will only be with me if he can get my inheritance m. What will I do?

In a sprawling seven-bedroom mansion, where creaky floors whisper family secrets, a 22-year-old woman stands at a crossroads. Her on-again, off-again boyfriend, a 35-year-old father with little to his name, has laid down a chilling ultimatum: secure the entire house from her ailing father’s inheritance, cutting out her sister, or lose him. What should be a sanctuary of care for her father has become a battleground for greed and control.

This isn’t just a story of a shaky romance; it’s a raw clash of loyalty, ambition, and self-worth. Her sharp retort—calling out his lack of achievements—hints at her fire, but the pressure to choose between family and a manipulative partner weighs heavy. Readers may feel her turmoil, wondering how to escape a love that demands such a steep price.

‘I 22F and my bf 35M, he said he will only be with me if he can get my inheritance m. What will I do?’

I and my ex have been on and off for a year, recently we have been back on good terms and was working towards a healthy relationship. I recently moved back in with my elderly father (who is a night mare to live with) since he wasn’t doing to well. So I brought my ex over a couple times to see where I was staying.

I live in a seven bedroom, three story house and ever since seeing the house my ex has been giving me an ultimatum. He said the only way we could be together is if I secure the house since my father split it between me and my 50F sister. My ex wants me to inherit the entire thing and to ensure my sister gets nothing.

He has become so insufferable he said it’s either I inherit the house because I should provide somewhere secure for our future. I told him that’s he’s 35 years old with nothing and a whole daughter and he has nothing to show for it. Did I go to far, let me know.

Ultimatums in relationships are rarely about love—they’re about power. “When a partner demands control over your assets, it’s a red flag for financial abuse,” says Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a clinical psychologist specializing in toxic relationships (DoctorRamani.com). The boyfriend’s insistence that this young woman monopolize her father’s house, sidelining her sister, reveals a motive more tied to greed than partnership.

The age gap and his lack of stability amplify the imbalance. Dr. Ramani notes, “Older partners targeting younger ones for financial gain exploit their inexperience.” His focus on the house, post-visit, suggests opportunism, not affection. The woman’s clapback—highlighting his lack of accomplishments—was a spark of self-defense, though it risks escalating his manipulation. A 2023 study in Journal of Family Violence found 48% of financial abuse cases involve demands for inheritance control, often paired with emotional ultimatums.

This situation reflects broader issues of autonomy in relationships. She could protect herself by firmly rejecting his demand, saying, “My family’s inheritance is not up for negotiation.” Consulting a lawyer to understand her rights and therapy to rebuild confidence could fortify her stance. Blocking him, as Reddit urges, might be her safest exit.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

The Reddit posse charged in like a cavalry, waving red flags and shouting “run!” It’s like a group therapy session with zero chill. Here’s the unfiltered scoop:

Piilootus − Imo, you didn't go far enough. Cut all contact with him and forget he even exists. He's a f**king creep and an a**hole.

bbipain − Girl, he's even trying to get you to turn on your sister. Nah run from that

grumpyyoshi − What a parasite, just run.

DplusLplusKplusM − OP, you're 22, this guy was a teenager the day you were born. Even if he weren't obviously trying to steal your family's assets (since it's not like he's going to live happily ever after with you once he gets the cash), he's way too old and you could do way, way, way better. Don't fritter your ancestors' hard work away on this scammer.

GameboyPATH − I'm not going to tell you my opinion, but instead ask you: What do YOU make of your ex's expectation? Do you believe he's entitled to your family's inheritance? If so, then why?

EntertainingTuesday − Off your post history, seems you've had some tough experiences the last 3 years. I'd recommend not adding/maintaining more. That means taking this bf/ex, who is 13 years your elder, and keeping them your ex. What a horrible, entitled ultimatum to give someone.

He has made breaking up easy, simply say I take you up on your ultimatum, we are broken up now. For your sake, block them and work towards zero contact as there is no reason to continue being on/off with this guy.

NorthernLitUp − What facet of your brain has made you think that being with a guy like this is a good idea?

Savings-Ad-3607 − First ask yourself why a 35 year old wants to be with a 22 year old. It’s never a good thing. He has shown you his true self believe it. Don’t get back with him

gaby_ramos − You did not go too far, you just started! Make his life miserable block him and just end things because he just wants to take what’s yours. Even if he gets his way, he’s going to be horrible towards you. There is no happy ending with him. You are too young.

RandomReddit9791 − I'm so sick of seeing these age differences between the males and females. It's always the older male doing some b.s. Please have the common sense to leave this man and go 100% no contact forever.

Redditors didn’t hold back, branding the boyfriend a “parasite” and “creep” for his blatant gold-digging. They cheered her sharp comeback but urged her to cut ties completely, warning of his predatory motives given the age gap and his daughter’s existence. But do these fiery takes fully address her emotional tie to this on-off relationship, or are they too quick to judge? One thing’s certain: this drama’s got Reddit on edge.

This young woman’s story is a stark reminder that love should lift you up, not demand your legacy. Her boyfriend’s ultimatum isn’t just about a house—it’s a bid to control her future. By standing her ground, she’s already showing the spark of independence, but walking away might be her ultimate power move. What would you do if a partner tried to claim your family’s legacy? Share your thoughts below—let’s keep this fiery convo burning.

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