Am I wrong for reading a hurtful journal entry about my sister-in-law after my brother and his wife read my private journals?

Shirley Stafford Hours
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In a dusty attic filled with childhood relics, a man’s heart sank as he caught his brother and sister-in-law giggling over his teenage journals—private pages brimming with raw, unfiltered emotions. The air grew thick with betrayal as the 32-year-old Redditor stood frozen, the sting of their mockery sharper than the musty scent of old cardboard boxes. What began as a nostalgic trip to help his parents pack turned into a family showdown, where personal boundaries were trampled, and old wounds were ripped open with a smirk.

The discovery wasn’t just about invaded privacy; it was a gut-punch of humiliation as his brother read aloud his adolescent musings, his sister-in-law’s laughter echoing like a sitcom laugh track. Furious and cornered, he flipped the script, unearthing a scathing journal entry about her. This tale of family, privacy, and revenge has Reddit buzzing with opinions, a story that hits close to home for anyone who’s ever guarded a secret.

‘Am I wrong for reading a hurtful journal entry about my sister-in-law after my brother and his wife read my private journals?’

Growing up, I (32M) used to journal. To my knowledge, no one knew about it or read the heartfelt thoughts I recorded, and if they did, they never disclosed that my privacy had been breached. Journaling became a source of comfort, so I continued well into my teenage years.As a male, I felt a bit self-conscious about it, so I used to hide this fact.

My parents are moving, and since they’ve had this house since my childhood, there's a lot of packing, organizing, and decluttering to do. As they're older, they need some help, so my brother (39M) and I came over to assist. While helping them, I found my brother and his wife (38F) huddled together, snickering as they read through a journal.

It was just a regular composition book, but instinctively I knew it was one of my “special” journals by their stupid giggles. so I asked, 'isn’t that mine?' As I walked over. I didn’t know exactly what they were reading, but I knew it was obviously personal and none of their business.

I told my brother to give it back, and when I reached for it, he told me to chill and snatched it back. We ended up wrestling over the book, causing enough commotion for my parents to come and see/ask what was going on. He says something like, “You guys HAVE to hear this,” and starts reading the entry out loud.

His wife is outright laughing, and he’s struggling to read full sentences without breaking into laughter. The memory of what they’re reading comes flooding back, and I feel a wave of huge embarrassment. I was fifteen at the time, and my twenty two year old brother had just started dating a girl (his now wife) who I thought was hot and way out of his league.

That journal, without exaggeration, is nearly two decades old and yet they were getting a real kick out of themselves, exchanging comments to my detriment & wanting to take pictures of the page. My annoyance turned to irritation. Yes, she was attractive, but within two years of their relationship, I realized she was ugly inside.

I still feel the same way today. I vividly remember writing something harsh about her in one of my journals when I was 18. It stands out because it happened right after my grandmother passed away, and her behavior during our time of mourning felt selfish and insensitive. She’s still that kind of person.

So, I retrieved the journal that contained that particular passage & read it aloud, too. I’ll admit what I wrote was mean and about how negatively I perceived her character. I told them everything written was my most up to date view of her, as nothing has changed about them. I truly find them insufferable and unpleasant people.

Things went quiet, and then my brother acted like he wanted to fight me. They eventually left. Now, days later, my brother is blaming me for triggering her depression, which I didn’t even know she struggled with. He says she’s been questioning her character, and my words are really getting to her.

I reminded him of the passage I wrote when I was 15, the one they read aloud and found so amusing, and suggested he refer back to that if he wants to cheer her up. He’s telling anyone who will listen that I unnecessarily hurt his wife’s feelings and that I’m a d**k. Was I wrong?

Family secrets spilling out can feel like a soap opera, but this journal saga cuts deeper than drama. According to Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, “Trust is built in the smallest moments, and betrayals, even unintentional ones, can fracture it”. Here, the Redditor’s trust was shattered when his private thoughts were mocked, pushing him to retaliate with a brutal truth about his sister-in-law. It’s a classic case of hurt people hurting people.

The Redditor’s brother and sister-in-law crossed a sacred line by reading his journals, a violation of autonomy that stings worse because it’s family. Their laughter turned his vulnerability into a punchline, so his counterattack—reading a harsh entry about her—was less about cruelty and more about reclaiming power. Yet, his sister-in-law’s emotional fallout shows how words, even true ones, can wound deeply, especially if she’s battling depression.

This story mirrors broader issues of privacy in families. A 2019 Pew Research study found 59% of adults feel they’ve lost control over their personal data. When family breaches that trust, it’s not just personal—it’s a betrayal of the unspoken pact to protect each other. The Redditor’s reaction, while harsh, reflects a universal urge to defend one’s dignity when it’s under fire.

Dr. Gottman’s advice emphasizes repairing rifts with honest communication, not escalation. The Redditor could acknowledge the pain caused while setting firm boundaries. For readers, it’s a reminder: respect privacy, or risk a fallout that no one wins.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit’s reactions were fiery, with users overwhelmingly siding with the Redditor, calling out his brother and sister-in-law for their blatant disrespect. Many saw their mockery as a cheap shot, arguing that reading private journals deserved the harsh clapback.

Opinions painted the couple as hypocritical, quick to dish out humiliation but crumbling when faced with criticism. These candid takes highlight a shared disdain for boundary violations, though some wonder if the Redditor’s retaliation went too far.

ersentenza − He says she’s been questioning her character. I say: about time!

Lurker_the_Pip − They are actually garbage human beings.. They think they are the stars of every show don’t they?. It’s best you get them out of your life early.. They can’t be trusted and turn themselves into victims when they did the crimes.. Not wrong.

AlwaysGreen2 − No you were not.. But your brother's wife and your brother are.

_Ravyn_ − Nope.. Your not wrong .. They FAFO!

grumpy__g − Not wrong.. If she is hurt, then she should apologise and change to become a better person.

BornToSingTheBlues − I'm sorry they thought your private thoughts as a teenager were so funny. It appears to me that you're way more insightful than they'll ever be even at a young age. You owned up to it and were truthful. YNW.

Mr_BigglesworthIII − Wow NTA f**k them they can dish it out but not take it

keepthecrazyquiet − They found out after they fucked around. Don’t read people private thoughts if you don’t actually want to know them. It’s an unfortunate situation but if they didn’t want to know all of your private thoughts they shouldn’t have read any of your journals.

groovymama98 − Nw Why wouldn't you use your own words to make a clear statement as to how you feel about them and their behavior? They chose to use your words as their entertainment. As for sil's depression. Maybe it's time to make the deep dive into what is wrong with her character. Maybe she should ask herself why your words are bothering her conscience.

latefortheskyagain − Some older siblings think it is ok to bully the younger kids. It sure hurts when the tables are turned. Good on ya!!

This journal joust leaves us pondering the line between privacy and family openness. The Redditor’s tale is a rollercoaster of loyalty, betrayal, and raw honesty that sparks reflection on our own family dynamics. Share your thoughts below—what would you do if your private words were turned into someone else’s entertainment?

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