AITA for yelling at a couple because of their kids at the airport?

Travel fatigue is a cruel beast—especially when illness is already stalking your family. Imagine trudging off a sixteen‑hour transatlantic flight, your body rattling with exhaustion and worry, only to be met by two hyperactive children sprinting through the customs line. Blood pounding in his mother’s temples, a 16‑year‑old son felt every bump and bump‑into‑ankle as if it were his own pain.

With her vision dimming from fever and ribs aching from inflammation, the mother could barely muster a whisper. Yet the children’s laughter felt like a hammer to her skull. When polite glances and small requests went unanswered by the parents chatting in their own language, the teen realized he had to choose: let his mom suffer in silence or break the fragile calm with a firm voice demanding respect.

‘AITA for yelling at a couple because of their kids at the airport?’

Last year I 16M went backpacking across Europe with my mom 44 for three weeks. We hit a few countries and it was a lot of fun but towards the end of our trip we got sick. I barely had a rash but my mom was hit bad with headaches fever nausea and patches of puffy red rashes/inflammation on her neck.

We were a day from our return flight and our medical options in Rome weren’t great so we decided she’d see a doctor first thing when we got back. She was extremely exhausted after such a long trip and worsening so by the time we got off our sixteen hour flight back to Cali she was practically a zombie.

We were waiting in the line at customs for American citizens and right behind us was a couple with two kids. It was a long line so we were stuck with them for at least twenty minutes and their kids were going wild. The two little boys looked to be around four and seven.

They were screaming and running in and out of the line bumping into people and stepping over feet. The parents were unbothered and speaking casually with each other in Italian. This was really upsetting my mom as they ran into us the most and the screaming only exacerbated her headache.

Now I’m not very confrontational unlike my mother I would rather bite my tongue but seeing as she couldn’t say much it really bothered me. I kept telling myself I’d say something after one more time and one more time and eventually I boiled over, I whipped around looked them dead in the eyes and said “you speak English right?!” “Keep your kids in line!” I didn’t yell but I was loud and firm.

The mom just looked shocked, picked up her kids and that was the end of it. My mom tried to say stop right beforehand but didn’t say much after. It wasn’t until I told this story to my coworkers back at work that my boss said I sounded like a Karen and overreacted. I think I held it together remarkably well but what do you think?

For a little more context we later found out my mom had a staph infection and almost went septic, plus she has multiple preexisting conditions like cluster headaches, hyperthyroidism (her thyroid was removed) and sleep apnea. Added (I forgot) brain lesions from micro strokes and heart problems.

Addressing disruptive behavior—especially in high‑stress, public settings—requires a balance of calm assertiveness and empathy. Dr. John Gottman of the Gottman Institute explains that “repair attempts” are critical moments when one person can defuse tension by acknowledging distress and offering a solution (https://gottman.com/blog/the-art-of-the-repair-attempt/).

In the airport scenario, the teen’s final, loud intervention served as an unorthodox repair attempt: it halted the children’s chaos and protected his mother’s fragile health. Yet experts caution that escalating to a firm command should follow a gentle request. According to clinical psychologist Dr. Laura Markham, “Children thrive when they understand clear expectations and consequences, but they respond best when guidance is delivered with warmth” (Aha! Parenting, https://www.ahaparenting.com/blog/boundaries).

In practice, a sequence of steps—first a polite plea, then a calm explanation of impact, and only then a firm boundary—creates a respectful dynamic. Because the teen’s mother was medically vulnerable—with a recent staph infection and complications like cluster headaches and heart problems—time was of the essence; prolonged pleading would have risked her safety.

In circumstances where someone’s health is at stake, the priority must be immediate cessation of harmful stimuli, even at the cost of social discomfort. Moving forward, families traveling with young children can preempt similar conflicts by introducing simple pre‑flight guidelines: quiet games, assigned waiting‑in‑line roles, or small reminders about others’ comfort. These proactive “repair attempts” shift responsibility onto all caregivers and reduce the need for dramatic interventions at the last second.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Here are some hot takes from the Reddit community—straight‑shooting and unfiltered:

Aggressive_Cattle320 − ESH You went on that flight in spite of being very ill. Your symptoms, including rashes, were indicative of some type of virus or infection, and you should have seen a doctor BEFORE getting on that flight. When traveling in foreign countries, you could have picked up anything along the way.

If it was a communicable disease, you could have sickened the entire plane full. Very irresponsible on your parts. Parents are supposed to pay attention to what their kids are doing and keep them from disturbing other people around.. I'm glad I wasn't there because I would have had issues with all of your behaviors.

[Reddit User] − ESH.. 1 -Your Mom flew while sick. That makes her an AH.. 2 - The parents behind you were letting their kids be obnoxious. They are AHs. 3 - You massively over reacted. Did you even try to ask nicely? I mean, I know there are a lot of AHs in the world but there are also a lot of people who will do their best to solve a situation if they know people are bothered. Next time try kindness before being an AH.

Tanuki0 − YTA your medical options weren't great in the capital city of Italy ? Come on now

wanderer0075 − So, you all admittedly just got off of a sixteen hour flight during which, presumably, these children were probably forced to be on their best behavior and not disturb other passengers. For sixteen hours. Children. They were letting off their own steam, just being kids.

Yes, customs lines are tedious and boring and the chaos that the kids bring to the mix probably isn’t ideal, especially considering that y’all were both literally sick and tired, but they were just being kids. Add to that mix the fact that your mom had a contagious infection and did not seek immediate medical care (which is mostly free or low cost in Italy) prior to traveling home.

If you were unsure where to seek medical care you could have contacted the US Consulate in Rome (a conveniently large city that is very familiar with tourists and foreigners), but really any publicly available hospital would have helped your mom.

I can see things from your perspective but as a former world traveler, I say you took your frustrations out on a tired parent who was probably just letting their kids be kids for a bit. Frustrations that were understandable but ultimately unwarranted as you made your own situation untenable for no reason. YTA

deadmencantcatcall3 − YTA you sound entitled and privileged. And throwing in your mom’s other non life threatening conditions there at the end doesn’t help your case for why in the hell you both got on a plane when you were sick. It’s disgusting and ableist.

They know how to treat staph in Europe. She probably wouldn’t have been “almost septic” if she’d gone to a doc right away and started antibiotics. Your mom looked shocked and got quiet because she doesn’t think you handled the situation with the kids well. Your boss also thinks you overreacted. Read the room.

RosieDays456 − First neither you or your mother should have been on that plane - Extremely irresponsible of you both, especially your mother, she should have known better. She risked you both spreading something to those sitting near you, gate and flight attendants or entire plane because you didn't know what was wrong with either of you. total assholes for doing that.

You should have gotten medical care before getting on a plane for a 16 hr flight Never travel without travel health insurance and travel insurance for your transportation and when traveling you should always allow 3-4 days extra in case you miss a flight, or like you two - were very ill and should have gotten treatment and stayed put for a few days.

 `“you speak English right?!” “Keep your kids in line!” I didn’t yell but I was loud and firm` YTA - you think you were being a cool guy by doing this - you just looked like an ass, kindness goes a long way, you could have simply turned around and asked the parents to please keep their children with them as they were running into people.

After a 16 hr flight everyone is cranky as hell and your being LOUD and FIRM was totally unnecessary without first trying kindness - you acted like a spoiled a**hole TRY KINDESS NEXT TIME

forwardnote48 − Medical options in Rome were not great? My guy it is the capital city lol.. Also, what’s with the “You speak English, right?” Did the three weeks of backpacking Europe but you just absolutely *had* to fulfill the stereotype of the entitled American didn’t you. I hope the both of you at least wore a mask on the flight YTA massively

AffectionateWafer482 −  Edit: I can’t deny flying sick was not very considerate, but we did not have the funds to continue to stay abroad for the duration medical treatment would take and we had to get back to our pets. Sorry no. Part of travelling abroad responsibly includes researching whether you need travel health insurance in the countries you're visiting, and if so,

purchasing that before you travel so you can access healthcare in the countries you're visiting without worry. If you can't afford that, you can't afford to travel. Also, part of travelling responsibly is having contingency plans in place for your pets in case of anything out of your control delaying your return home. .

There should have been no reason not to see a doctor in the country you got sick in. . And anyway:.  For a little more context we later found out my mom had a staph infection and almost went septic Pretty sure you couldn't afford for her to die on the plane home, which absolutely could have happened, and sounds like it nearly *did* happen. Get travel health insurance next time and see a doctor **when** you're sick, not days and a long haul plane ride later. 

As for telling off the parents. Kids were being kids, parents were probably exhausted. Which doesn't excuse letting kids run into others. But you yourself admit you held your frustration in until it boiled over, rather than addressing the parents calmly the first time the kids bothered you. So that part of the story is ESH, but given the irresponsible attitude to travelling sick, that tips you (and your mother) firmly into YTA. 

Ogolble − If you and your mother weren't sick, would it have bothered you as much? I have a feeling you both were annoyed more because you weren't at full capacity. But what the f were you both thinking getting in a flight in that condition? You could literally kill people spreading germs like that

canningjars − I am surprised they let you on the plane. You have zero respect for seniors, immunocompromised individuals and the public in genersl. I am surprised that the mother did not turn you into the ticket agent for being rude and ill. You had no business doing either thing. You could've spoken quietly to mom You have no idea what she's been through and if the kids run around outside the plane more than likely they'll sleep on the plane so I truly think YTA. .

These reactions capture the chaos—but do they account for the mother’s serious condition and the teen’s protective urgency?

Public confrontations often hinge on tiny choices: when to speak up, how firmly to press, and whether empathy can coexist with authority. In this airport crisis, a teen’s loud plea became the only way to safeguard his mother’s health. What would you do if a loved one were suffering in plain sight? Would you risk social awkwardness to insist on basic respect? Share your experiences and thoughts below.

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