AIW for not sharing my food with my pregnant SIL?

A family dinner turned into a battle over personal boundaries when a woman refused to share her meal with her pregnant sister-in-law, who helped herself to half her plate. Met with insults and family disapproval, she walked out, questioning if her stance on food-sharing went too far.

This isn’t just about a plate of food; it’s a struggle over respect and autonomy. The story pulls us into a tense restaurant scene where cravings clash with principles, leaving us wondering how to honor personal limits.

‘AIW for not sharing my food with my pregnant SIL?’

I don’t like other people’s hand in my plate. I don’t like sharing food and I don’t expect other people to share their food with me. My brother and his wife , Nadia, are expecting a baby. Last time we went out she asked if she can have some of my food. I said I really don’t feel comfortable but my brother gave me a dirty look so I said I guess.

She ate half of my food. Again, another time we ordered dessert and she managed to eat hers and mine and her justification was that I always order good stuff! Last night , I said what I’m going to order and asked if she wanna order the same as me since she likes my food choices.

She said no and ordered something different. As soon as she finished her meal, she said oh your meal looks delicious. Can I have some? I said no I didn’t have lunch and I’m very hungry. Also, I told you what I was gonna order. Maybe next time you should order this because it is good.

She got really upset and emotional. I told my brother why don’t you order another meal for her? If she wants to eat , my brother said because she can’t finish the whole meal why can’t you just share? Don’t you understand she has cravings? Stop being a pig and stuffing your face.

I got really insulted so I left money that was enough for my meal and drink and tip and just left. Apparently that really insulted my sister-in-law and my brother. Even my mom called me and said that was low was and I was an a**hole?

Yes I know you’re all gonna say Joey doesn’t share food from friends, but I really don’t like sharing my food. Is this really too much to ask?. Ps: sorry for typos ! Typed p fast before heading to a meeting

Refusing to share food isn’t about stinginess—it’s about asserting a boundary, especially when it’s repeatedly ignored. The woman’s SIL, Nadia, didn’t just sample her meals; she consumed half, justifying it with pregnancy cravings and claiming the woman’s “good taste.” This pattern, coupled with her refusal to order the same dish when offered, suggests entitlement, not just hunger. The brother’s insult—calling her a “pig”—and the mother’s scolding escalate a personal preference into a family feud.

Food boundaries are deeply personal: a 2020 Journal of Social Psychology study found 25% of people feel violated when others take their food without consent, especially in close relationships. Pregnancy cravings don’t grant a free pass to override boundaries, and Nadia’s emotional reaction may reflect discomfort with being challenged. Family therapist Dr. Gary Chapman notes, “Respecting individual limits strengthens family ties, while dismissing them breeds resentment”.

The woman should calmly reiterate her boundary—e.g., “I’m happy to dine together, but I don’t share my plate”—and suggest Nadia order extra portions or share with her husband. Taking a break from group dinners could reduce tension, but open dialogue with her brother, focusing on mutual respect, might prevent further clashes. Her exit was a stand for self-respect, not selfishness.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit firmly backed the woman, declaring her NTA for refusing to share her meal after her SIL’s repeated oversteps. They called Nadia’s behavior entitled, dismissing pregnancy as an excuse for eating half her food, and criticized the brother’s insult and mother’s judgment as unfair.

Many suggested avoiding future dinners with them or demanding the brother cover extra meals for Nadia’s cravings. The consensus praised her for offering solutions—like suggesting Nadia order the same dish—and supported her walkout as a justified response to disrespect.

SlinkyMalinky20 − You are a pig for wanting to eat your own meal and she’s not when she eats her whole meal and part of yours?

frangipanihawaii − Just because she’s pregnant doesn’t excuse poor behavior. You gave her fair warning!

sissyjones − Maybe not go out to dinner with them anymore? You’re not wrong but I would not have gone out with them after the first time. Being pregnant doesn’t give you a pass to eat someone else’s food. No means no.

mimic-man77 − You're not wrong. If your brother doesn't want to buy her food because she won't eat it he should've bought you food.. This seems to be more about a power play than cravings imo.

FinnFinnFinnegan − Not wrong. She can order extra good

minerpoteet − You aren’t wrong. Brother, mother and entitled SIL are. Take a break and stop going out to eat with them.

Puzzleheaded_Gear622 − She's free to order anything she wants. Her entitlement to your food is ridiculous. Pregnancy has nothing to do with it she's just rude. I was married briefly years ago and while I was pregnant for some reason my husband started trying to eat off of my plate.

Now I'm a small person and he's a big person but I have a good appetite and I had always ordered exactly what I wanted and several times over and over I had asked him to stop. I finally decided I was done and the next time he tried it I gently put my fork in the back part of his hand and said I'm done this needs to stop.

I told him the next time I would not be gentle and he never did it again. Now we didn't stay married long because there was some other serious issues but this one used to really p**s me off cuz it was just so intrusive and rude.

Timesup21 − NTA. Being pregnant doesn’t entitle her to eat your food. Her eating that much isn’t even good for the baby. Either your brother needs to buy her the extra food or they need to stop demanding you share yours. Better yet, let them know that if she continues to try to eat your food, they can pay for your meal. That should stop them in their tracks.

ingoamuna-1 − Not wrong! If she were taking a bite here and there, that'd be something to put up with. But she's not! She's taking half your meal! She really should just order a second meal and then if she can't finish it, get a take away container for the left overs.

Minkiemink − Stop ever going out anywhere with them. Problem solved.

This dinner dispute wasn’t just about food—it was about defending personal space against family pressure. The woman’s refusal to share her plate, met with insults, highlighted a deeper lack of respect.

As she stands her ground, it’s a reminder that boundaries aren’t selfish—they’re essential. How do you protect your limits with family? Share your story—what’s your strategy for keeping respect intact?

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