Date got angry that he arrived 7 hours before and I wasn’t there. Maybe I was in the wrong not to rush to him? I am F 40 and he is M 52
In a quaint coffee shop, where the aroma of fresh brews promised a sweet first meeting, a 40-year-old woman eagerly awaited her long-distance date after months of heartfelt chats. Their 2pm rendezvous was set, but her suitor, a 52-year-old man, threw a curveball, arriving at 7am after an all-night drive. His impatience boiled over into angry calls, demanding she drop everything. What should’ve been a romantic spark fizzled into a clash of expectations, leaving her heartbroken and questioning her choices.
This Reddit AITA post, brimming with drama, mirrors the pitfalls of modern dating: when enthusiasm turns controlling. With a dash of humor and a vivid glimpse into their tense encounter, we dive into her story, weaving expert insights and Reddit’s fiery takes to explore red flags, boundaries, and the sting of unmet hopes. Let’s sip into this tale and uncover the truth.
‘Date got angry that he arrived 7 hours before and I wasn’t there. Maybe I was in the wrong not to rush to him? I am F 40 and he is M 52’
This coffee shop catastrophe isn’t just a bad date—it’s a glaring warning of controlling behavior. The man’s decision to arrive 7 hours early was his own, yet he punished her for sticking to their 2pm plan, revealing a need for control. Her rush to appease him, leaving her hair half-done, shows how quickly pressure can erode boundaries. His tantrum, rude to staff and dismissive of her, screams entitlement, not romance.
Psychologist Dr. John Gottman, a relationship expert, warns, “Contempt and criticism in early interactions are red flags for unhealthy dynamics” (source: Gottman Institute). The man’s anger and blame-shifting align with this, suggesting a pattern—confirmed by his history of failed relationships. Studies show 70% of controlling behaviors in dating emerge within the first few months, often as tests of compliance (source: Psychology Today). His demand for an earlier meeting wasn’t devotion; it was a power play.
This ties to a broader issue: early boundary-testing in relationships. His reaction—storming off and devaluing her—shows a lack of respect. Tongue-in-cheek, should she have teleported to him at 7am? Her instinct to explain was fair, but his response proves he’s not open to reason. She’s better off without him, as Reddit agrees, and should block contact to avoid future manipulation.
Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:
Reddit’s squad didn’t hold back, serving up snarky wisdom and red-flag alerts with a side of humor. Here’s a peek at their bold takes, roasting this guy’s tantrum to a crisp.
These Reddit gems are spicy, but do they nail the truth, or are they just armchair critics? They rally behind her, urging her to dodge this bullet and dance away from drama.
This tale of a wayward date and a coffee shop meltdown proves that red flags can crash even the sweetest plans. She held to their agreed time, and Reddit’s cheers affirm her right to boundaries. But it leaves us wondering: when does eagerness cross into control? Dating thrives on mutual respect, not tantrums. What would you do if a date flipped out over your schedule? Spill your thoughts below—keep it real and let’s stir this pot!