AITA I threw away a hamper full of clothes and my mom got mad?

Shirley Stafford Hours
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In a home where clutter has slowly become part of the scenery, what you toss away can sometimes spark unexpected conflict. A routine cleaning session turned into a household battle when an old hamper filled with forgotten clothes—some carrying the unmistakable scent of cat mishaps—caught the eye. For one individual, it was clear that those items had long exceeded their usefulness and belonged in the trash.

Yet, while one person saw an opportunity for a fresh start, another viewed the act as carelessly destroying memories and valuable possessions. The following day, emotions ran high as a beloved parent protested the disposal, arguing that throwing things away wasn’t cleaning but a loss of items that might still be useful someday. This episode highlights the tensions that can arise when personal definitions of “clean” and “valuable” collide within a family.

‘AITA I threw away a hamper full of clothes and my mom got mad?’

I was cleaning. Our house isn't the cleanest, and it's mostly clutter.. So I was cleaning the bathroom and looked at an old hamper full of clothes. It was originally in our washroom but moved to our bathroom. It's full of old dirty clothes that have been sitting in there for maybe a couple years now.

They've been collecting dust, and some items even smelled like cat p**s. It smelled awful and like I said, has been sitting untouched for years. So I threw it away. The next day my mom was upset. Saying that I threw away perfectly good clothes. And how I always throw away things when I clean.

And she brought up how I'm always throwing away sauce packets. Which we by the way also NEVER use. She told me,

Managing household clutter is not just about tidying up—it’s a delicate balance between practicality and sentimentality. Home organization experts agree that periodically decluttering is essential for a healthier, more efficient living space. Items that no longer serve a functional purpose, especially those that are dirty or emit unpleasant odors, can indeed be classified as trash rather than treasures.

Psychologists suggest that overattachment to material items can sometimes be a sign of deeper emotional issues, particularly in households where hoarding tendencies may have developed over the years. Allowing a space to be cleared of nonessential items can create room for positive change and reduce stress. The decision to discard long-forgotten, deteriorated belongings is often a step toward reclaiming a healthier home environment.

From a practical standpoint, professional organizers advise that a systematic approach to cleaning is crucial. When you come across items that are clearly past their prime—such as clothes with lingering odors from pets—it is typically best to let them go. Streamlining possessions not only improves the physical space but also promotes mental clarity and reduces clutter-induced anxiety.

Furthermore, mental health professionals stress that open communication about sentimental value versus practical use is key within families. They recommend discussing and agreeing on what qualifies as necessary or valuable before beginning a major clean-out. This proactive dialogue can prevent hurt feelings and establish a mutual understanding, ensuring that each family member’s perspective is respected while still moving toward a cleaner, more orderly home.

Check out how the community responded:

Here are some candid takes from the Reddit community—insightful, humorous, and reflective of the common frustrations found in modern cleaning dilemmas. Many users agree that if items have been neglected, collect dust, and develop offensive odors, they are more likely trash than treasure.

Multiple respondents noted that holding on to unused sauce packets and outdated clothing is counterproductive, even comparing it to classic hoarding behavior. The general consensus is that cleaning effectively means knowing when to let go, even if that decision is met with resistance from those who cling to the past.

Over-Marionberry-686 − So your mom is a hoarder? NTA

Helpful-Tell-43 − NTA. Cat p**s. I do have a drawer in the kitchen with an array of packets. I also have several packets in the fridge. No cat p**s though.

StAlvis − INFO. Um.. Why the heck did you guys just **stop** doing laundry one day?

BluebirdAny3077 − NTA and when stuff is destroyed by cats its now garbage. No one wants pissed on clothing. Part of cleaning is getting rid of garbage. Tell her if you could have saved it and washed it you would have but in this case, nope.

And if things like packets of things aren't used, they too are garbage, as you can't donate them. Maybe leave a few but d**p the rest. Check out r/hoarding if you need specific help with getting rid of things with someone who tends to hoard things they never/can't use.. Bets of luck in keeping things clean.

Objective_Attempt_14 − NTA, Op you mom is clearly a hoarder, the key it to start small, a little everyday, a packet here or there, take it with you to work or school and toss along the way. The clothing 1-2 items over time. Hamper is empty, move it out of sight then toss it...

The packet build up, but my guess if she thinks your using things, it will be less of an issue. Maybe thats an old jar bottle of something in the fridge. Pour out a little at a time here or there, Rinse sink, when empty then toss.

melsa_alm − NAH You’re definitely not wrong for wanting to throw away ruined clothes that may be a potential health hazard, and that are taking up space and no one is utilizing. But your mom is also NTA here if she has hoarding disorder. Hoarding disorder is a mental illness.

Many sufferers have extreme anxiety and place far more importance and value on their personal possessions than the average person would. They also tend to overestimate the usefulness of personal possessions. So while you threw away something that has little to no value to you, it may have felt to your mom more like you threw away a treasured possession.

Hoarders typically feel intense anxiety and lash out in anger when others around them disrupt their physical space (organize or purge) and the possessions within it. It’s not right that your mom got angry with you for cleaning up, but she really can’t help having hoarding disorder if she has it. She will likely need professional help for it.

Then-Chocolate-5191 − NTA once a cat pees on something, they’ll do it again and again, and it’s impossible to get the smell out, that hamper needed to go in the trash. Sauce packets should be tossed when you finish the food they came with, they’re more likely to get squished and make a mess in a drawer than to be used. Has your mom considered getting counseling for her hoarding issues?

Aware_Welcome_8866 − Ask her to name/describe 3 items in the hamper of clothes you threw out. Then you’ll have your answer.

bananadickpin − NTA. As an adult: Throwing things away that are ruined or unused is absolutely cleaning. It sounds like you're in a situation where things need to be tossed to properly clean so keep doing what you can

RaineMist − NTA Yea, it was full of clothes but clothes being that old to where there's dust and cat p**s on them, most likely aren't exactly

In conclusion, this domestic drama serves as a reminder that perspectives on cleaning and saving possessions can vary widely within a family. The act of discarding old, unusable items, while seen as a necessary step toward tidiness by some, can be a source of conflict for others who value every retained item as a memory.

What are your thoughts on balancing sentimental value with the need for a clean, clutter-free home? Would you agree that some things are best left behind, or do you think every item deserves a second chance? Join the discussion and share your perspective.

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